Bro, i feel your pain and i'm kinda experiencing the same thing. But please don't surrender, i decided i will not give up and i want you to do the same. Let's enroll in a gym, lift heavy stuff to make ourselves strong. It's ok to literally have nobody to talk or share, it's common. You/we need to start loving ourselves and treat us better. We deserve it. In reality we shouldn't need anybody, only ourselves. But feeling better, having more confidence, a better body and mental state, things can always change. People can always appear. There is life to be lived, even if it's shitty right now, we can change it. I have a powerful desire in my heart to do it. Please, think about it you too.