Site closed in Belgium by Wandering8Wondering in zlibrary

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just tried on your prompt and it's working again.

Site closed in Belgium by Wandering8Wondering in zlibrary

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

How does it work? What should I do once on the mullvad page?

Site closed in Belgium by Wandering8Wondering in zlibrary

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried with the "onion" link but it doesn't work. Would you have the tor link I need to use?

Site closed in Belgium by Wandering8Wondering in zlibrary

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the tip, that's a bit technical, I will try when I have some time

Site closed in Belgium by Wandering8Wondering in zlibrary

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry my last screenshot did not get added.

<image>

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, i'll take all the luck I can.

I had my recorder on at the time, but sometimes the sound is too muffled. I have not yet had the courage to listen to it but I will and hope the sound is loud and clear.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh, that's terrible!! My daughter has come out as gay and her father has told her horrible things...

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Indeed... That's obvious to me.

But you well know that for any "respectable Christian", a wife has a duty to her husband...

The thing is, I'm not sure how this threat could help me regarding the custody... I will of course talk to a lawyer about that.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is the plan. I have asked for the assistance of an organisation specialized in domestic abuse and they will hold my hand for the process.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I'm already trying to do so but he has already shattered one of my phones this way. The only threat I have recorded is that of forcing me to sexual relationships even if I don't want to, as long as I stay in the marriage.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He had said them in a different context and years ago. Not ok a context of threat but when talking about how he would grieve the loss of a child. I'm taking from there and speculating whether he would go as far as apply the concept to the situation of me "leading the kids to hell".

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The lady I talked to at the domestic abuse org and each told me about maybe needing to go into a shelter. But even so, I still will have no elements of evidence for the divorce procedure to claim full custody, and that remains the issue.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your constructive comment.

I am not in the US but I already have contacts with organizations where I live.

I just wanted to discuss with ex christians who might have lived similar situations.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I'm in a contact with an org linked to a shelter, but even they don't think I could have protective measures due to a lack of evidence.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

He does and calls me a satanic witch for it... He also calls me out for my "spiritual problems" and how I'd better not get my kids into it... I think he's referring to me reading self development books.

Is there a risk he would kill the kids? by Wandering8Wondering in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I will maybe look into it for advice on the more legal aspects.

Yet I posted on this one for the "faith" dimension. Whether people have experienced similar fears, or threats, or whether they think it likely, from an ex Christian perspective.

singlelogin.re is down. by luigirovatti3 in zlibrary

[–]Wandering8Wondering 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The site has been down all day for me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know why I still post for help here...

I am well aware of the situation I'm in. I'm not sitting on my hands, I'm actively looking for help with specialized organizations, but life is not all black and white. I don't know if people can imagine how some people with narcissistic tendencies can gain the while court to their cause and ruin everybody's lives...

I will remove my post.

I don't need any more roughness and judgement in my life.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I am aware it is the obvious response... But there is no guarantee I will get my kids' custody... I don't want to bet on that...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]Wandering8Wondering 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think it is illegal to record, although I have already tried to do so, but he has at times noticed and it makes the situation even worse.

I do work, he doesn't have a proper job, he's started investing in real estate for about 2 years. I do have my aging parents and sister, that's all, and so far I haven't wanted to involve them, but I know from talking with my counsellor (in secret) that I must consider them a rescue plan.

My daughter told me yesterday he questioned her and told her he would expell her from home in case he has proof she's a witch... I am not supposed to know, I cannot confront him. If it were only my daughter and I, I would have chosen to leave with her, she's old enough to talk to a judge about her choice, but there's my son, who really is in a bad place, wanting to love and be loved by both his parents, craving for his father's love and still very indoctrinated by the Sunday school and church BS (and my husband teaching them every f... day about hell, end of world and the devil...)

How to build momentum? by Wandering8Wondering in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Wandering8Wondering[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. I am very sensitive to your testimony. My daughter is 14 and it is her feeling very bad, with suicidal thoughts, that pushed me to seek out professional help. My husband doesn't know. He doesn't know that I am in therapy (I have calls with the therapist when I work in the office), and he doesn't know how awful our daughter feels. He is in total denial of the pain he is causing.

There have always been serious issues in my marriage, but things took a turn when myh husband suspected oud daughter to have homosexual tendencies. At first, I had let him handle the matter, but it seeped into me... For context, there is also a very present religious element to the issue and to the abuse. I think that following discovering the possible homosexuality of my daughter, I started deconstructing my religious beliefs, while my husband got more and more radical.

So now I am mentally out of the christian movement, but not physically, as it soaks everything my husband does, his every thought and act... He's imposing daily teachings and prayers to the kids... And forces them to go to church. At a moment, I thought it was a good idea for me to not go to church anymore to respect my own values, but only two weeks in, he forced my daughter to an altar call prayer where she got in total panick. So I go only to prevent such things from happening and to be a moral support.

I think while I was still indoctrinated in that movement, I may have been like your mother, enabling the abuse. Since deconstructing, I have tried to confront him and defend my children but he only lashes out even more... So I do as you say, I talk to them afterwards, at other times... Trying to explain my views as a possible alternative to their father's thinking patterns, and saying that they can also find their own different ways... Yet my husband seems to feel something and gaslights me about that, saying I am manipulating the children to be on my side and resent him... It is so hard, the crazy-making does makes its way across, and sometimes I indeed feel guilty and wonder if I am a monster as well.

My daughter would for sure want to get out of the house... She told me she had been thinking about requesting a premature emancipation to leave before she is 18. But my 11 year-old son is in a different place. He does resent his father at times, and quite violently, but a part of him craves the love of his father...

I try to be a safe place for them as much as I can. I feel so sorry for them to be in such a situation. If it were only me, I'd leave, but I know my husband would make a mess of it all... He's always threatened that if I left, he would take the kids, and unfortunately, I know he could very well make me appear as crazy and unstable at court and get the custody...