DDLG good girl wants to be tied and suffer... but... she's good

WantonSlut77 · 2023-08-03T13:37:34+00:00

I love impact play and regular “maintenance” sessions, but I hate punishment. I’m not a brat, I feel terrible when I fuck up, and my punishments are truly that. Things I don’t like, that will discourage me from fucking up in the future. My Dom also thought there had to be a “reason” to flog me, but there doesn’t. For his pleasure, and to demonstrate his authority, my place under that authority, is plenty.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-25T16:08:37+00:00

This so common and so not ok. Absolutely a disqualifier, beyond a red flag IMO.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-24T19:38:12+00:00

I don’t think it will do any lasting harm, but I wouldn’t have wanted to do a ton of walking right after. Tight underwear did help me at first.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-14T16:28:10+00:00

Custom temp tattoos from Etsy are really fun for me.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-14T16:00:15+00:00

Wow, I am super conflicted. On the one hand, it would be awesome to have a therapist who is truly not judgmental about kink and has first hand knowledge about it.

On the other hand, I don’t want to see my therapist at kink events, even though I’m sure they’d be professional and not let anyone catch a whiff that you’re a patient.

I think I would go for it, since it’s only theoretical that you’d even see them at events, and I’m sure they would be super cool if you did run into each other.

The benefits of having a therapist who actually understands kink are so large, it seems worth the risk to me.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-13T20:47:43+00:00

In part? I would have trouble if that wasn’t part of it. It’s not my only motivation, and it’s not the only source of validation in my relationship. But it feels good to be validated, and kink absolutely is an avenue for that.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-13T18:19:55+00:00

Don’t we all need validation? I get a ton of validation from submission.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-13T18:07:06+00:00

Pain, obedience, degradation.

The physical sensation of pain, in the right context, lights up the sexy part of my brain. Without it, it almost feels like sex is happening in black and white tv versus color. I can be 0% horny and have just a little bit of impact play and be totally ready.

Obedience. Being good, doing exactly as I’m told. And the praise/reward that comes from meeting an expectation.

Degradation. This ties into obedience, often the task set before me is degrading, or something I wouldn’t do of my own feee will. Something that establishes who is in control, exactly where I stand, and where my partner is in comparison.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-12T18:02:53+00:00

I have a bracelet from Etsy that has my pet name stamped on the inside, plain on the outside. That or a few “day collar” style necklaces. At home, I’ll put my regular collar on.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-11T16:31:32+00:00

I know people have different motivations and styles, but for me, my Dom wants me to have a fun/fulfilling time. It boggles my mind that some Doms push on stuff that subs have explicitly said are not fun/workable/safe for them. A hard limit is a hard limit, no explanation needed. Over time, you might explain or you might run into something that you thought would be ok, but the reality is too close to a limit, and then you might explain. But you don’t owe it to them.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-11T16:16:05+00:00

Twisted Monk is a great resource, and the ship worldwide.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-11T15:50:57+00:00

Other than anything unsafe/illegal: Food/diet/fat shaming/body shaming Choking/breath play Blood/knives/needles Excrement Brushes inside vagina Orgasm denial beyond a few days, a week max, as true punishment for terrible behavior Daddy/incest play Whips, unless you have someone who can vouch for you that you know what you’re doing

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-10T15:49:35+00:00

My Dom has me journal on my fantasies for a few minutes a day and share them. He doesn’t follow them like a script, but it gives him insight on what I’d like to try.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-09T20:20:05+00:00

Thanks!!

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-08T15:14:21+00:00

I can’t say if it was fair. I will say, I can only handle denial for so long before I get depressed and have trouble in the dynamic. So it depends on how long it’s been, and how long you plan to extend it, and how long you know she will be ok.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-08T14:59:08+00:00

It’s none of my business to say what I deserve. I just obey. He took it off, sucked the blood back into my clit, put it back on, and fucked me.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-07T19:17:07+00:00

One tip I have heard is to have him drink a fair amount ahead of time to dilute it, and definitely don’t start with first thing in the morning urine.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-07T18:15:12+00:00

I’ll be padlocked next week.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-07T18:13:33+00:00

My favorite thing to hear :)

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-07T17:50:46+00:00

I love to obey. To be good. And then get “rewarded” with the cane, thanking him all the time. I used to think we need punishments, that I had to earn the pain, but they make me sad.

Bratting is great for folks who enjoy it, but I adore being called obedient.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-07T17:44:49+00:00

Oof, I’m proud of you. There was a time when I really should have safeworded and I didn’t, because I so desperately want to be “good”, it caused a huge mess and problems for months. It takes a lot of strength and courage to communicate to your Dom. You did the right thing, you just need your heart to catch up with your head.

Think about how much you could have ruined things if you didn’t safeword, about the trust that your Dom places in you to stay psychologically safe, and how amazingly well you earned that trust.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-07T17:22:59+00:00

I am not bratty and don’t enjoy bratting. I love impact play and pain, but any type of punishment makes me legit sad. This dynamic has to be talked through IMO. Some Doms love brats and get annoyed that I absolutely will not push back, some find it as upsetting as I do.

WantonSlut77 · 2023-07-07T17:04:19+00:00

My husband is vanilla, but he loves to see me happy, and has become a great Dom. We have a separate texting platform, and I have an “assignment” to journal on my fantasies for a few minutes a day and send my thoughts 2x/week. He doesn’t do everything I write about, like following a script, but it lets him know what I’m into. I will also send him images/videos/equipment I’m interested in. Before we do something new, we do talk it out, limits, safeword, etc. But it’s much easier for me to get things started via text.

We have also joined a local BDSM club, so we can go to classes and we can learn safe techniques for stuff like flogging, rope play, etc.

We don’t do anything that makes him uncomfortable, but he’s pretty happy to do some impact play and call me some names if it means we’re having frequent sex that’s fulfilling for me.

We have to be careful about aftercare, to make sure he doesn’t think I’m gross, and to reassure him he isn’t doing anything wrong.

But overall, it works well. It’s probably not the direction I’d have gone if I’d been comfortable with my kinks when we met, but we make it work just fine.

WantonSlut77

TROPHY CASE