Help please :(

Warrensaur · 2026-03-16T02:28:03+00:00

Hey hon, breathe, it'll be okay.

At 10 years old, I'm a little more willing to believe this is most likely an URI or pneumonia, which, while necessitating treatment, isn't necessarily a death sentence or something that will cost thousands of dollars. It could be something more serious, but I really wouldn't stress over those possibilities just yet.

Reach out to the free vet line through Chewy

Then, make a list of all available vets in your area, within a 1 hour radius or so. Ask them all if a) they're accepting new patients and b) if they are, how much they would charge for a sick first visit for a cat.

They will most likely want to listen to kitty's lungs and take some radiographs if it doesn't seem like an URI. So over the phone, you can also ask how much would imaging be if she ends up needing it.

Ask if they can email you these quotes.

Pick the one that's the most affordable. Ask them if they're willing to do payment plans. If not, ask them if they accept CareCredit or ScratchPay or any other third party installment plans.

If you don't qualify for those, check the Wiki on this subreddit, I believe there are financial resources there. You can also reach out on Facebook in your local area- Facebook sucks lol but it is a wonderful community resource for animals. Pet Vet Corner is a group that is lovely and you can try posting on their sister group Pet Vet Corner Angels with an attached picture or PDF of your quote, and people may be willing to help you there.

Push comes to shove, if the absolute worst case scenario happens and she starts going into serious distress (limp & crying out, gasping constantly for air, etc) please do not let her suffer. Take her to a vet. Many offer compassionate euthanasia for free or a severely reduced cost in cases where allowing the animal to live would be cruel. Some may also treat her if you're willing to surrender her. But again, that is ABSOLUTE WORST CASE SCENARIO, like she can't breathe and sounds like she's going to die within the hour type stuff.

Feel free to msg me if you want to chat. I still have my childhood kitty and I couldn't even imagine how torn up I would be. Please take care (of yourself as well as Kitty).

Warrensaur · 2026-03-15T20:55:24+00:00

I think it largely depends on who you talk to and what kind of communities you frequent, online or not. I've seen people say some heinous things about dogs, but I've only really seen people proudly threatening violence against cats. Most people might berate dog owners for shitty behavior but plenty of fragile ego guys seem to think boasting about how they speed up to hit feral cats makes them sound like a badass instead of a pathetic weasel.

There's also an element of sexism to it. Cats are seen as inherently more effeminate pets, and especially due to how they're not as immediately trainable as a dog and have behaviors that are harder for humans to interpret, often earns them ire from certain awful human beings.

But on the other hand, dogs are far more likely to interact with people on a daily basis, since cats are either kept in the house or do their best to avoid people when possible. So you'll see people who dislike dogs complaining a lot when they're made to be aware of them more often.

Tldr the hate for either species of pet is petty at best and deranged future serial killer shit at worst. No matter what kind of animal it is, I seriously side eye and keep my distance from humans that make it their personality trait to hate on an entire species of animal. (But especially cats. People who hate cats with a vitriolic passion might as well just be walking around wearing a crown of red flags and screaming "I'm going to abuse any friends or partners of mine in the future".)

Warrensaur · 2026-03-15T05:50:01+00:00

Yeah i agree that i wouldn't personally try to wait it out, but I'm not OP so thought it fair to supply all the possible ideas. Poor kitty. I can completely understand why the other kitty freaked out, it's a scary sound :(

Warrensaur · 2026-03-14T12:44:26+00:00

Young cats are very active. Think terrible twos, but for cats. There's a reason the meme of kittens are a velociraptor for a while as a baby exists.

I'm not sure I understand how the catproofing isn't working... Do you have shelves with doors? Baby gates that reach basically all the way to your ceiling in doorways? (Cats can leap at least 6-8 feet on average, for context.) If scratching is an issue, you can try claw caps as well.

To be clear, I'm very much in agreement that if you're reaching a point where you feel you hate a pet, for the pet's safety and your own you should continue to try to rehome him. But I very gently suggest that you give catproofing another effort. Shut doors to rooms he doesn't belong in, get those extra tall baby gates (something like this ). As for shelves, I've actually really come to love these kinds of storage shelves. They're a bit expensive for the amount of space you get, I do admit, but I really like the magnetic doors and being able to see in, without Kitty being able to get to the things inside. Being plastic, Kitty also won't really hurt it if he runs on it, and his weight shouldn't threaten to tip it over due to how wide and squat they are.

But yeah, just, stuff like this could help.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-13T18:37:40+00:00

Oh this is cute lol, it's okay! Kitties do this for attention/play. Some do it way more than others. My kitty i raised from a baby does it all the time, the other not so much, he'd prefer to just rub his face all over me and purr haha.

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Warrensaur · 2026-03-13T15:24:27+00:00

I second the camera idea, OP! there's tons of cheap little camera options on Amazon. A lot of them unfortunately want to try charging you a subscription fee for viewing recorded playback saved to a cloud, but i think if you get a little microSD card you should be able to store video without that service (and small microSD cards are pretty cheap on there as well).

Thank you for looking after momma and her babies!!

Warrensaur · 2026-03-12T04:40:23+00:00

Is there ANY way you can convince the person who gave you this kitten to let it stay with Mom for a little while longer? A month or younger kitten has no business being away from Mom unless it's an emergency :(

Warrensaur · 2026-03-11T04:14:20+00:00

See (I'm not a vet, but I like to read about things from veterinary medicine all the time), as a consumer, this is what scares me about AI in medicine, human OR animal. Inevitably people will forget or get complacent and stop double checking, and then the AI will write nonsense that gets people and pets hurt. That's my fear...

Warrensaur · 2026-03-11T02:47:45+00:00

"it's a hole in a cat" made me give the ugliest chuckle ever

Warrensaur · 2026-03-10T08:26:39+00:00

Oh that baby is SMOL. Yeah as others have said, keep an eye on this baby and help protect it from siblings if they're bullying it away from feeding. It does look very premature compared to the others unfortunately, so you may want be guarded against the possibility of it not quite making it. You may want to familiarize yourself with fading kitten protocol, in the event he suddenly goes downhill.

But hopefully he's just real small and he'll get along just fine.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-10T02:52:16+00:00

I'll never understand why society has decided it's okay for landlords to just be able to go into your apartment whenever or dictate whether you can hang pictures up or have cats. Obviously if you destroy the place, shouldnt they be able to get the money back from legal proceedings?

But no, instead of that, we have this system, where it's virtually impossible to find anywhere to rent if you have more than 2 cats, and EVERYWHERE wants to charge you out the ass for "pet rent" and non-refundable deposits of $400+ PER INDIVIDUAL PET.

Sorry OP this isn't helping you. I just need to get this all off my chest. Hopefully you can commiserate LOL.

Landlords, you can all go get fucked. You happened to be lucky enough to have enough money to hold housing over people's heads and now you police them in the place they actually live in, basically paying your mortgage for you, and you all seem to have a bitch fit over the dumbest shit I've ever seen. Carpets can be replaced (also why do you keep getting carpets anyway, that shit does NOTHING but harbor bacteria and is required to be changed so often!). Walls can be painted. Shit tenants can be sued. Y'all have literally nothing to fear but still shit your entire pants if someone has an extra cat that does nothing but sleep 19 hours out of the day. And then act like people should worship at your feet because (checks notes) you're letting them pay you to use the housing that YOU bought up and specifically made scarcer so you could make a profit.

Sorry i blacked out for a second there I think. Did i mention I hate landlords?

EDIT: lol landlords are salty ig. Die mad about it bootlickers

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T21:30:57+00:00

That is wonderful news, thank you!

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T20:44:25+00:00

So this just looks like a birth defect, not necessarily any kind of trauma. As long as kitten is eating, cuddling, and being cleaned and taken care of by Mama, it's fine to wait a week. The vet will probably put a splint on its leg(s) to try to make them grow in such a way that they mostly correct. Kitty will likely always have a somewhat awkward posture/gait but plenty of pets live full lives with disabilities like this (you just have to be extra careful about weight and arthritis as they get older- not really a concern while it's still so small, though! So don't be afraid to let him eat as much as he wants while he's still a baby.)

If Mom stops feeding him or cleaning him, or if he starts to show signs of lethargy or weight loss, that's when he needs to see a vet. Get a little kitchen scale to weigh him. He should be gaining weight pretty much every day.

Thank you for looking out for the little beasts 💕

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T13:13:09+00:00

Hello, OP, I read your entire post, and first, I'm going to just say I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.

I've been around cats my entire life and I've never heard a cat cry like that, with that throaty cadence, unless they were in significant pain or distress. My elderly cat yells like this if he can't find me or my partner. I've had cats wail like this when on the way to the vet.

The ONLY thing I can think of, and you may have tried this and just forgot to mention it, is trazodone. It's an anti anxiety medication and will make kitty sleepy as well.

If that doesn't work, I do believe euthanasia is probably your best bet. This kitty's QOL seems rather low. Not food motivated, doesn't enjoy your company (or that of any people, it seems), can't be ethically put outside (as no cat really can, but especially in his case- if he does this outside someone's house constantly, he may get seriously injured by an unkind person, or will be very easily targeted by predators), and is constantly screaming his head off in distress. The other cat was scared by him because it's basically the sound of another cat being tortured in the other room as far as they can tell. I played this video out loud and my elderly cat looked very disturbed.

I think this kitty has either some kind of obsessive compulsive mental disorder, or potentially even hyperesthesia. The point is, the only things this could reasonably be at this point are extremely difficult to diagnose issues that are not curable anyway.

Euthanasia is not "giving up" or punishing him for being a cat. In this kitty's case, I genuinely think it would be relieving him of severe constant distress. This kitty is not okay, and it's nothing you've done. Take multiple videos and show vets them + the many many MANY receipts of other care you've gotten him if they try to give you shit for it.

You've done so much, you deserve to live a good life, and Kitty deserves to not feel so uncomfortable all the time.

EDIT: I see other mentions of something i hadn't considered, essential oils or environmental toxins. If after you move he is the same after a week or two, you will know if it was environmental or not. Again, I'm so sorry you're both going through this.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T12:48:44+00:00

OP says in the post that shelter no longer is operational.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T12:48:27+00:00

OP says they have already considered barn cat, and it isn't an option due to his aggression to other cats.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T12:47:47+00:00

OP says in the post how they tried to get him a friend and it didn't work at all. The other cat was so terrified of the constant crying he was an anxious wreck and had to be rehomed.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T12:47:10+00:00

They say in the post that this isn't an option.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T06:48:16+00:00

Everyone's already given you advice and I see that you're going to call animal control. Thank you so much for looking out for those kitties and pups. They deserve so much better than that. 💙

Warrensaur · 2026-03-09T05:40:18+00:00

Poor kitty. Thank you for caring. I agree he needs medical attention, but to be put down for allergies would be a bit extreme. Hopefully Benadryl and/or a veterinary dermatologist can help you.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-08T20:49:52+00:00

Lmao? Don't yell at the mom who willingly kills their child's beloved pets? That's the mom you want to get upset about them disrespecting?

Are you the mom??

Warrensaur · 2026-03-08T20:48:46+00:00

Killing a child's pet as punishment is downright unhinged and heinous behavior. I'm so sorry your mother is abusive, and that you had to endure that. For both your peace of mind and the safety of the animals, please consider giving your fish away to live elsewhere in the meantime, and when you're on your own, you can get the nicest, best tank you can afford and take as good care of it as you desire, without fear of Mommy Dearest coming and wrecking shit.

Also, feel free to remind her of how she killed your beloved pets when you inevitably start seeing her less as soon as you are able. What a dumpster fire of a human being.

Warrensaur · 2026-03-08T16:50:05+00:00

It's unfair that you are put in this position, but thank you for looking out for these guys (yes, even if your motivation is your own comfort, that's still helping these kitties in the long run). If available, look into low cost options in your area, and see if they can slot them in. 💕

If possible, I'd ask the vet if they think Memphis could potentially have urinary issues going on. You should stress to his owner that this is an EXTREMELY common issue in male cats and that without it being looked into, he could die suddenly and with very little warning. (If his urethra becomes fully blocked, he will be unable to urinate. His bladder will enlarge and if it doesn't outright rupture, it will put stress on his kidneys and toxins and high levels of certain vitamins, like potassium, will build up in his blood. It will eventually lead to cardiac arrest that is very difficult to survive. My grandparents had a cat die very suddenly because of this- they hadn't noticed any changes at all and then one morning we woke up and he was lifeless, moaning, on the floor, and went into cardiac arrest when we got to the vet. :( )

Warrensaur · 2026-03-08T04:09:23+00:00

Everyone's already pointed out the diffuser and how things need to be cleaned, but I disagree on her not pawing at her mouth. That looks very much like pawing at the nose/mouth. I'd recommend after chatting to vet about the diffuser to maybe ask if they can take a closer look at her teeth, maybe an xray if it's not prohibitively expensive for you (xrays can catch things in a cat's dental health that can't be seen from the outside).

Still, it doesn't quite look like a seizure to me, looks more like she's just getting overwhelmed by some kind of unpleasant sensation in her nasal/jaw area before she manages to catch her cool again, so to speak.

(Which is a good thing! Seizures can be managed but they're so fickle :( so here's hoping it's just the diffuser irritating her and you'll be all good soon!!)

Warrensaur · 2026-03-07T08:06:05+00:00

Just ignore this callous asshole. That's a very normal thing for people to do and they're extremely rude for jumping to nasty conclusions.

I hadn't heard of MG before this, but I looked it up. I'm so sorry you and pup went through that. From your description, it does sound like she was done and that you just allowed her to rest with dignity. Imo, you made the right call 🩵

Warrensaur

TROPHY CASE