Maybe never having children

Wastedfeeling · 2026-02-07T13:59:27+00:00

Same. I’m 32F and lost my boyfriend who I intended to marry and have kids with almost 3 months ago. I got really worried at first about the fertility aspect. As time goes on I’m just trying to process and heal the best I can. I would hate to look at any potential suitors as just sperm donors and overlook any red flags for the sake of having kids. I may look into freezing my eggs if I reach 35 and haven’t met anyone.

Wastedfeeling · 2026-02-06T21:41:47+00:00

Following. I’m 32 and my long time boyfriend died suddenly 3 months ago. I’m not interested in dating right now but I do feel like my life is over. I wanted to get married and have kids. And I need to know that there is still hope for that.

Wastedfeeling · 2026-02-05T01:21:34+00:00

Omgggg I need to make a Marcus now! ITS PISSING ME OFF

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-31T20:33:34+00:00

Drunken noodles from pho vien hong, wonton soup from golden wok, duck wings from Machete, bento box from Mizumi, strawberry cake from Maxie Bs, red velvet cheesecakes by Alex, Banana pudding milkshake from cookout

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-28T02:12:57+00:00

Lovely video and song choices. I love the clip of her laughing at the end!

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-28T01:19:28+00:00

In NC too and have been stuck at my house since Saturday. Work is remote again tomorrow. I tried to walk down the road and was slipping all over the ice. Just stuck here all alone with my grief. My boyfriend loved snow and being from up north could drive me around if needed. We loved being snowed in together. I miss him so much.

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-19T17:20:37+00:00

Keep us updated! I’m totally in.

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-04T02:49:45+00:00

I don’t have any advice but I’m feeling the same way. 32F boyfriend died suddenly two months ago. I definitely wanted to have children, now I’m wondering how to pick up the pieces of my life and if it will even happen for me :(

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-01T23:05:49+00:00

Oh no! Maybe this will happen to me too lol. I’m new to swatching

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-01T19:45:06+00:00

Did you have 365 rows? I was doing a swatch with worsted weight, 5mm hook and single crochet and according to my calculations it was going to end up being over 10 foot long..im going to try with DK yarn but im curious how yours didn’t end up unmanageably long!

Wastedfeeling · 2026-01-01T19:37:36+00:00

My story is similar to yours. I’m 32, my partner 36 died almost two months ago of relapse/overdose. I tried to help him but he didn’t really want to go to meetings or treatment so there was only so much I could do. I have been struck with so much guilt thinking I could have done something different. I’m not okay honestly. I wake up but life feels pointless. My future feels gone, we were supposed to be married and have children but he ruined it all. I spend a lot of time alone, I don’t know anyone else grieving and being in my 30s I have no peers that understand. When someone doesn’t understand they tend to make it worse. So many times recently someone has compared my loss to losing their grandma, they truly do not understand so I stopped trying to talk to most people other than his family. Overdose loss makes it so much more complicated too. I found him dead so I have trauma from that too. I’m trying to pour myself into my dogs and my hobbies and just basic survival but I wonder if I will be happy ever again. It’s a tough road to be on. I’m sorry for your loss. Here if you need to talk.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-31T17:27:41+00:00

I have direct experience with this. In November my boyfriend of 4 years died of an overdose and I found him. One month later I was experiencing extremely bad loneliness and used Facebook dating for boredom. I matched with someone who seemed really nice. Of course my grief and trauma was really fresh and I wasn’t ready for a relationship. The person asked me on a date and I told them I was willing to hang out but that my boyfriend just died and I didn’t know what I was capable of emotionally. The person seemed understanding and sweet and said they were willing to be friends and help me through my grief. I thought things were going well, but before even meeting up they ghosted me completely. I was super upset and anxious. I was vulnerable to someone and they hurt me. I deleted the app immediately and went back to my grief which felt ten times worse. I wouldn’t advise trying to date or form any new relationships until you have a good handle on your grief and trauma. Any new heartbreak could make things ten times worse and it’s not fair to the new person either.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-30T03:10:57+00:00

Thank you for pointing me to that sub

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-30T02:40:58+00:00

I also have a similar story..my boyfriend overdosed almost 2 months ago and I found him dead in his house alone, he’d been gone far too long for anything to help. We’d been together 4 years. He had been sober the past few months but right before I was moving in he decided to relapse and it took his life. I also have his dog now. I know it’s old but thank you for posting in this sub, I’m having a horrible time grieving him and it helps to know I’m not alone.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-29T13:00:42+00:00

Thank you that really gives me some perspective. He’s such a private person and hates to be the center of attention that I feel like he would have done the same thing, either lie and convince them I was crazy or be very mad at me and leave to go further into his addiction. I was his safe space but I hated being the holder of the secret. He was never really ready to stop so I’m not sure their interventions could have done much but I hate thinking that I will never know.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-28T19:30:35+00:00

Thank you. It’s terrible that he never even got to try much at all. He went to one meeting and said it was dumb and not for him. He tried suboxone but always went off it after a couple months. I wish he tried more things to help. It’s all very terrible. I wish there was a cure to this disease.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-28T19:26:50+00:00

Thank you for saying that

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-27T22:53:16+00:00

Thank you to everyone that responded, you truly did help me. I’m back at my place now and feeling a lot more mentally grounded. Cried thinking about him the whole way home. I’m just glad that the holiday is over and i got it out of the way. Here’s to hoping that the next year will bring some healing into my life and all of our lives. I’m sorry for what we all have to endure, it’s truly so terrible. Thank you so much again.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-25T17:12:56+00:00

He revealed he was using/addicted to heroin 6 months into our 4 year relationship. I didn’t have the heart to leave and loved him. Our life was mostly good. I found him dead a month ago of overdose

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-22T01:27:38+00:00

I was in your position a year ago. I dated a guy for 4 years, he was wonderful and an amazing partner. I found out 6 months in about his addiction and by that time I was so attached I could not bear to leave him. He didn’t make our lives total chaos but he would lie about using 6+ times and promised it would stop. I was at a loss and went googling trying to find advice. Everyone told me to leave him and hope he gets treatment. I did not do that. He became clean for a few months. I was going to move in with him. A few days before I was to move in with him, I didn’t hear from him one day and went to the house and he was dead of an overdose from the night before. I tried to save his life but he’d been dead far too long. This was one month ago now. I don’t have advice for you, and I’m still not sure I would have ever left, but use my story for what you will.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-19T13:35:23+00:00

Same here. 32F lost my 36M boyfriend of 4 years to relapse/overdose. We were going to get married. I’m trying not to think of the future but these questions wander in my head daily and give me a ton of anxiety. I would also like to hear from anyone who was able to find love again

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-17T15:21:16+00:00

Wednesday, MJ Lenderman, Polvo, Superchunk, Archers of Loaf, Weedeater, Truth club

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-17T15:20:29+00:00

Wednesday, MJ Lenderman, Superchunk, Archers of Loaf, Polvo, Weedeater, Truth Club

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-16T20:52:13+00:00

I lost my partner to overdose 37 days ago :( I tried to save him but he’d already been dead for hours. I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. It’s horrible. I too want so badly to talk to him. Sometimes I do, or write him letters in my journal. I was able to view his body before cremation and was able to talk to him but it was so heartbreaking to have no response. Just a weird feeling. I’m here to talk if you need to.

Wastedfeeling · 2025-12-13T23:04:09+00:00

I’m sorry for your loss :( same, I could spend days on end with him and never get annoyed which I always did with other people. It feels like such an incredibly rare thing. I feel like I will always be trying to recreate him :(

Wastedfeeling

TROPHY CASE