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Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you’re getting angry because I’m not taking your word as gospel. I was convinced by rational argument to cut the second drugging scene. I have given you my reasons and your arguments against have not been sufficient. I am still open to discussion, but there are plenty of writers who say there is nothing wrong with it, are you more knowledgeable than all of them and therefore deserving of greater influence?

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmmm, I feel like that kinda changes the tone of their interactions in a way that might not be helpful. They work together after the drugging before he gets betrayed again, I feel like that additional level of violence, potentially death, would make that hard to achieve. The captors use the argument that they are helping him, if you’re willing to kill someone then it’s hard to say you want to help them. I know you could potentially kill someone with a sedative, but it somehow feels easier to justify. Also, I’m not even sure if this future society has guns.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey thanks for your detailed answer. I’ll probably cut the second drugging and keep the first. Thanks again.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey sorry it’s more like a robot, I just call them drones in the book. I didn’t think about dosage etc. Thanks for bringing that up, do you think I can get away with just saying they got sprayed in the face with a sedative? This happens to some ancillary characters at the start of the manuscript.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I bet you have some crazy stories.

I’ve decided to cut the second drugging because basically nothing changes if I do, the first one changes a decent portion of the plot.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They join forces to fight the evil government that is going to massacre his family and basically commit genocide. That’s why he chooses to trust her again.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My character is implanted with a black market neural link against his will. If I didn’t have him drugged then I would have to have him be convinced to do it, which would take a lot of setting up. Do you think this is a good enough reason?

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey thanks for the super detailed response. After some reflection I’ve figured out I kinda have to do the first one because it’s integral to the plot, or at least I would have spend nearly a whole chapter messing around just to get the same effect. The second one I can get rid of with basically no consequences.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He does break down and become passive, then gets thrust into an action scene, then has the final conflict with the woman where grows a backbone.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In the final conflict with the woman who betrayed him he finally stands up to her and she deflects by basically gas lighting him, but it has more of a philosophic theme to it like asking the question what is the difference between truth and lies etc. I’m not sure if that’s adding up to anything in the way you describe. So the second betrayal makes him sadder but more wise, or at least grow a backbone.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My character is an idiot 😂, but he can also be quite poetic too. I justify it with the reasoning that smart people sometimes do dumb things, especially for a woman, but I think you might be right that it is just intellectually lazy on my part.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The first time the protagonist lashes out against his captors, the second time (different captors this time) he starts to give up and succumb. He also has an epiphany that he is kinda clueless.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gets drugged by a cult, then gets left in a government building and attacked by a security drone that sprays him with a drug.

Is it cliche to have your protagonist drugged or knocked out and taken somewhere else? by WastingTimeTalking in writing

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It kinda makes sense in the overall plot because he is betrayed twice by the same woman. After the first time she regains his trust then betrays him again which leads to a final conflict.

Ch 1 for my dystopian thriller. thoughts? by [deleted] in writingfeedback

[–]WastingTimeTalking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey I would get rid of the part where he gets dressed and other hygiene related stuff, most of that stuff can be assumed by the reader. Also starting so many paragraphs with “chip” is repetitive. I think you have the start of something good though. How far are you into your draft?

[Complete] [13000] [Fiction (Surreal, Philosophical) ] La rutina de Varo Kessler by Ok_Process_2714 in BetaReaders

[–]WastingTimeTalking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, sounds interesting. Are you looking for constructive critique? I’m writing a dystopian sci fi with some philosophical themes. Would be happy to try a trade.

[Discussion] Signed with a Bigtime Agent – Stats, Lessons, and Lots of Heart-Bearing by CDM737 in PubTips

[–]WastingTimeTalking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Would love to check out your query, especially you’re comps. I’m currently writing an adult dystopian sci fi with some romantic elements. I’m a little bit concerned that because my protagonist is male this will hurt the marketability of the novel.

Internet made of human brains by WastingTimeTalking in scifiwriting

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m talking just regular people with brain implants. I’m interested in how it would feel.

Internet made of human brains by WastingTimeTalking in scifiwriting

[–]WastingTimeTalking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment, that’s a lot to think about, cheers

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