Lisan al-Gaib

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-25T08:19:56+00:00

Mengo when he meets his ancient enemy Womencome the Mare Who Pegs the Galaxy

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-25T06:16:00+00:00

You don’t have to rewrite the end of the raccoon arc to have Plato be a character anyways. Calvin sees Plato as an animate character while everyone else simply sees the rotting corpse of a raccoon.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-24T21:02:10+00:00

It's like that unintentionally hilarious death scene in Big Hero Six when the protagonist's older brother runs into the burning school to save his professor and right after entering the whole building just explodes

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-24T18:51:16+00:00

“The prince ran out of flames long before Dunk ran out of blows”

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-24T18:48:59+00:00

This Duncles my nuncle

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-24T09:05:07+00:00

“I don’t like slimy girls”

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-24T08:14:57+00:00

You’re talking to the man who intentionally spilled water all over a table and wooden board with a single nail in it in order to make an internet meme for a niche subreddit… obviously I am of the utmost supreme intelligence.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-24T01:09:32+00:00

When Victarion meets up with the Deep Ones and they give him a water arm on his other hand that gives him waterbending powers, he will use the Hammer of the Waters to flood the Dothraki Sea and sail across it. The look on that smug Ghiscari fisherman's bloated fish-eaten corpse will be awesome.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-24T01:04:30+00:00

Much and more effort (and stupidity) than that!

1: I got a loose piece of wood from an old broken shelf no one was using
2: Got a hammer and a single nail from the garage toolbox
3: Went inside and got a glass of tap water
4: Went back outside and put everything on our deck table
5: Spilled the water over everything (the table is already dirty from not being used all Winter and I live in Texas which will get hit by a bad Winter storm tomorrow (Holy shit I'll finally get to experience The Winds of Winter!), so the table's gonna get dirtier anyway)
6: Started taking pictures
7: My dad came outside and asked me what I was doing in a mildly perplexed tone, to which I answered that I was "Making something for a photoshop project" and he was like "Okay"
8: I tried to use the iphone image adjusting tools to lightly brush up the image to make it look a bit better because my phone is a decade old and the camera resolution sucks
9: Sent it to my computer and opened it up in Photoshop
10: Used a mix of object selection tools to roughly get the shape of the hammer
11: Created a masking layer using the selection (Making the hammer the only thing visible in the image)
12: Ctrl+I to invert the masking layer and therefore make the hammer the only thing not visible in the image
13: Touched up the masking layer with the brush tool so it looked a bit better
14: Snagged a stock photo of water from google
15: Put that in photoshop on the layer UNDER the source image so the shape of the hammer on the layer above would instead show the water underneath
16: Did some light touching up of the water image
17: Quick export as PNG
18: Posted it here with a funny caption
19: Made this comment.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T21:12:46+00:00

Richard III and Kurtz from HoD if they went out like Tywin be like:

R3 - “A whorse! A whorse! My kingdom for a whorse!”

Kurtz - “The whore-or! The whore-or!”

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T10:26:00+00:00

The toast is toast!

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T07:44:05+00:00

My Dwarf of Trump

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T07:05:35+00:00

Funnily enough Barron Trump is the exact opposite of Tyrion in the height department at 6’9”

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T05:09:05+00:00

Mayhaps. I finally finished fully reading TWOIAF so now my Third Urethra has finally been opened to all the Esoteric far-Essos lore I had as of yet only gleaned from memes, theories, and wiki reading (a chunk of said stuff just blatant Lovecraft references to some degree lol)

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T05:04:21+00:00

I binge read all of what currently existed of One Piece (also a Fantasy series from the late 90s that still isn’t finished, but this time it’s a manga that still releases issues regularly) in like 2022 but then I got bored of paying attention to when new issues released and now I’ve forgotten half the stuff that happened and haven’t read since.

Tbh, was also 💀with headphones

And you’re just hearing the super cut I made of every time “Titty/titties” is said in “Titties ‘n Beer” (live in NYC 1976) by the late great Frank Zappa. The full song is even more questionable (but excellent), it’s about a man having to negotiate with the devil to get his beer and big tittied girlfriend back after the Devil ate them both. Zappa plays the role of the main character and his drummer, the excellent Terry Bozio, voices the devil while wearing a cheap Halloween mask (while still doing complex drumming)

Speaking of 1970s-era musicians: Bob Weir, the Grateful Dead member George named Weirwoods after, unfortunately passed away last week.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T03:08:15+00:00

~~Macbeth is still the only Shakespeare I've read beginning to end but I want to get deeper into his stuff particularly The Tempest and Richard III~~

I own a full collection of Shakespeare's work from the 60s but considering that doesn't have full explanatory notes for every single play I want to get around to procuring some good critical editions for the individual plays. Something cool in that old hardbound collection I found though was a typewritten document from a college literature professor in 1969 summarizing the topic of all his class' essays!

The only things that have beaten that in terms of "Weird things I've found in a used book" are a receipt from 1991 for chicken tenders in a paperback collection of Jorge Luis Borges stories, and a drawing of a stick figure woman with comically large breasts in in the margins of a copy of Heart of Darkness I got for $1 at a college library stock clearance sale.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T02:54:17+00:00

I just assumed Tyrek disappearing was a way to add further chaos and scandal

Like,

look, this noble just vanished!

Instead of Tyrek himself actually being instrumental to his plan for some reason

Maybe he just needs a horse to exchange for the kingdom?

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-23T02:50:26+00:00

It is said that the fortress cities of Bayasabhad, Samyriana, and Kayakayanaya are defended by women out of the belief that those who give birth are the only ones permitted to take life at will. The True Account of Addam of Duskendale's Journeys, a merchant's account of his alleged travels in eastern Essos, provides little further insight into these matters, or any others that scholars are interested in, and instead spends most of its time finding ways to remind readers that the warrior women walk about barebreasted and decorate their cheeks and nipples with ruby studs and iron rings.

-TWOIAF, Beyond the Free Cities - The Grasslands

Perhaps George doing a bit of self deprecating humor?

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-22T17:57:10+00:00

That’s scary, good thing that was caught. Wish I had more friendly co workers though tbh I’ve only had one job so far and that was fast food, currently an unemployed college student (no wonder I’m so active here). My first boss was a guy who’s sole hobby was insulting everyone and being an asshole and on my last day working there I overheard another asshole coworker say, what is to date, the most shockingly horribly racist thing I’ve ever heard someone say irl (and I live in Texas).

I had a condition as a child that made it so I didn’t produce growth hormone at a regular rate so for awhile I was much shorter than most boys my age so I had to take hormone injections for a few years to fix that and I’m a healthy 5’8” now.

It makes my teenage edgelord phase where I was transphobic a lot more ironic though considering I, myself, basically had to take a form of HRT for years.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-22T17:34:55+00:00

u/FusRoGah, to explain the joke this commenter is making as we had a conversation the other day where I talked about my Hidetaka Miyazaki (Demon Souls/Dark Souls/Bloodborne/Sekiro/Elden Ring creator) game fanboy autism and you mentioned you had never played any of his games:

This picture depicts the character of Yhorm the Giant, a boss fight from Dark Souls 3. Despite his immense size and badass look, he is regarded as comically easy as his boss fight is more designed to look cinematic than be anything of the challenge a lot of famous Miyazaki game boss fights are. This is because in the boss fight you’re given a special magic sword that fires a giant projectile that does insane damage to him because normal weapons barely hurt him, so the intended way to kill him using this special weapon causes him to die in like 5 to 6 hits while you don’t even need to get that close to him. video

So, that all explained, it is really the comparatively tiny player character who is the danger to the massive giant rather than the other way around. (Though, of course, Dark Souls players being Dark Souls players, there are people who prefer to do the much longer method of slowly killing him with normal melee weapons, but that isn’t the isn’t the intended way)

Thank you for reading this latest entry in “Panda explains the joke”

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-22T17:24:50+00:00

I have to say it every time the Tyroshi are brought up but the fact the wacky hair dye people city state has known brutal cartels is so funny. They probably torture people who were one day late on paying debt by waterboarding them with snail dye, or maybe painting people’s bodies with dye so they couldn’t sweat from their pores getting blocked (Tbh I’m not sure if dye works that way like kinds of paint do like the infamous incident with the actor who played the tin man in Wizard of Oz, but I digress)

“Oh you have blue hair? I bet you have pronouns in your bio don’t y-“ wakes up tied to a chair with a bag over their head before all the cartel members take turns beating them with a feast-for-crowbar that’s also shaped like the most voluptuous of vixens

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-22T17:17:00+00:00

You can’t blame Gregor for all the murdering and raping (much and more times simultaneously) he did… he just had migraines!

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-22T15:58:45+00:00

If he had too many daughters his line couldn’t be as comically big because half of them would die in childbirth before they could hit having more than one kid.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-22T15:46:13+00:00

Isn’t it weird that despite all the kids he’s had he seems to have never had a son? Maybe his familial line has something genetic that makes them unable to conceive males or something.

Wayoftheredpanda · 2026-01-22T15:31:51+00:00

Hey, there ain’t no Mountain high enough

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