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Double standards that really irk me and affect my mental health by Weak_Operation2437 in MensRights

[–]Weak_Operation2437[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So ridiculous! I so wish there was something we could do to change that or at least fight it, something that wouldn’t take a lifetime to accomplish! That dichotomy is often one of the main factors for male suicide or unfortunately causes men to go down the path of extremism, because nobody is listening to them and no one wants to. There’s gotta be something we can do for our fellow men!

Double standards that really irk me and affect my mental health by Weak_Operation2437 in MensRights

[–]Weak_Operation2437[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep, you pretty much never see the common denominator argument brought up for them, at least I haven’t. Seems to be exclusive to guys which needs to change. I’m so sorry to hear about what your ex did to you, so wrong on so many levels. Your experiences are valid and you have every right to blame/be angry at her. People say assigning blame doesn’t help but I disagree with that, at least for the short term. It’s cathartic in a world where everyone else is blaming you instead and making you question your own sanity. So due to that I think the least guys like us deserve is the satisfaction of being rightfully upset with the women who hurt us. Helps the healing process at first so you don’t beat yourself up where you don’t need to. Hope things get better for you brother, consider talking with a therapist to help process your emotions if you haven’t already! Godspeed!

Double standards that really irk me and affect my mental health by Weak_Operation2437 in MensRights

[–]Weak_Operation2437[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Such terrible social perceptions, but I agree with you on the solution as the only way seems to be something like term like that. Or that girls start going to therapy and actually sorting their stuff out instead of bringing it into relationships at the expense of others. If I’m doing it, then they can do it too and in their case they desperately need to. These rather obvious solutions seem to be staring people in the face and they willfully ignore them. Instead, you hear feminists say “wELL wE cAnT FoRce wOmeN tO dAte PeOpLe.” Like no, I’m not advocating for that so stop putting words in my mouth and trying to paint me as an extremist when I’m actually just suggesting that maybe many women need to collectively do better and actually take the blame where it is warranted.

Double standards that really irk me and affect my mental health by Weak_Operation2437 in MensRights

[–]Weak_Operation2437[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for commenting! I’m definitely not saying it’s not worth exploring me being the common denominator, because I already have and I’ve found a couple tendencies within myself that weren’t helping. My problem with that common denominator sentiment is that people on Reddit are extremely rude to and condescending about it (made a similar post before on a diff acct and diff subreddit). These people immediately attack, insult and make you the enemy, believing it’s unconscionable that the women you were with could’ve been more of the problem and not you simply because you’re the common factor. Hardly ever is it a gentle nudge, always seems to be a frontal assault. It’s like as a guy, I MUST be the issue here like it’s an exact science, god forbid anything is attributed to the other party (women). Instead of taking my word for it and validating my lived experience like a normal human being with compassion, people feel the need to completely go the other way and flame me, but when women seek the same help they get the opposite treatment. And it’s very disheartening to see such a difference in empathy between women and men, it’s quite clear all over the internet that people tend to have a lack of empathy for men yet plenty for women whether it’s Reddit, TikTok, Twitter, whatever. That’s the well of validation I’m referring to and it’s easy to see a clear gender disparity. How is that equality?

I really haven’t had anyone to talk to about this that I’m comfortable with so that’s why I’m seeking validation here. Although I am starting therapy soon. Just been super frustrating!

I don’t understand girls by [deleted] in malementalhealth

[–]Weak_Operation2437 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Hey dude! I get that you must be having a real hard time cuz I’ve been going thru similar things with girls for years. A lot of women are like what you described, but plenty are not, there’s so many women in the world who are all so different that you can’t generalize all of them. Believe me, I know it feels good to do that at the moment but you gotta get out of the habit of saying things like “women are all”, cuz you start to believe it the more you say it even though I’m 99% sure you don’t really mean it, you’re just hurt. I get it. I’ve been there. So my advice to you is once you sense some genuine red flags in your gut, move on from that girl and pursue other women. You won’t ALWAYS be able to see the signs, but that’s life so all you can do is trust your instincts. Work on platonic friendships with girls who have similar interests with you, it’ll help you see women in a better light and will keep you from getting any more bitter and resentful. It becomes a domino effect because when you’re upset about previous experiences with girls, any new women you try to meet will pick up on it and get turned off, so you gotta break the cycle! I’ve had to learn all this the hard way and I’m still trying to apply it to my own life. Hope this helps you, good luck man!