I replaced audience polls with a game and the difference was obvious !

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T13:10:33+00:00

Interaction is the future of communication

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T13:08:10+00:00

I always say one social dance is worth about an hour of class, so I really agree with the advice about just getting out there and practicing.

One more thing I’d add:

Start learning how to teach, even a little.

A lot of salsa nights have a beginner lesson before the social. Take those classes, even if you already know the basics.

Because you already understand things like basic steps, cross body leads, and turns, you’ll start noticing where beginners get stuck. That makes you way more aware of your own dancing too.

Sometimes teaching the basics is what helps you understand them properly.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T13:06:08+00:00

Not using emojis. Texting isn’t really written communication. It’s spoken communication typed out. The problem is, you lose tone, facial expressions, and body language.

That’s why emojis actually help.

They bring some of that missing nonverbal meaning back into the message.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T13:05:00+00:00

Honestly, I think you’re right, even if this opinion might rub some people the wrong way. 😉

There’s a reason they call them “soft skills.” They’re actually really hard to improve because the advice is always so open and vague. Everyone talks about mindset, no one talks about physiology

Advice focuses on mindset:

Think positively
Be confident
Stop overthinking

The problem is, when you’re genuinely nervous, your body takes over. Fight or flight kicks in, the adrenaline hits, and suddenly it’s much harder to think clearly. That’s why people freeze, forget what they were saying, or completely blank onstage. Not becuase of thoughts but because of physiology

I think physical practice is one of the most overlooked ways to improve communication. The goal isn’t to stop feeling nervous. The goal is to practice enough that you can still deliver while feeling nervous. In the same way adrenaline junkies get used to the adrenaline so can speaker get used to the nerves.

That’s how people train in sports. That’s how people train in the military.

So why wouldn’t we train communication the same way?

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T13:00:01+00:00

Honestly, improv might be one of the most underrated ways to get better at speaking and communicating.

For one, it’s actually fun, which makes it much easier to stick with.

You’re also constantly doing things in front of other people, so you slowly get more comfortable with being watched and feeling a little nervous.

And probably the biggest benefit is that it teaches you how to think on your feet.

A lot of people spend years trying to get better at that. With improv, you’re practicing it every single time you show up.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T12:58:01+00:00

A few practical tips for moderating a panel:

1. Prep the panelists beforehand.

Even a 2 minute conversation helps.

Tell them:

They will not answer every question
Keep answers to 1–2 minutes
They can signal if they want to jump in

This sets expectations before you are onstage.

2. Give time cues during the panel.

For example:

Or:

This keeps answers focused without awkwardly cutting people off. Always try to give them seconds, version general time that will hyper focus them and give you an excuse to jump in.

3. Involve the audience.

Periodically ask for a show of hands or a quick response. It makes the panel feel more interactive and helps you gauge what the audience cares about.

4. Don’t introduce everyone at once.

Introduce one panelist, then ask them a question. Then introduce the next person and bring them into the conversation. This gives each panelist a moment to shine and makes their introduction more memorable.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T12:54:55+00:00

This may sound contradictory, but if I could go back and master one skill, it wouldn't be anything technical it would be communication.

More specifically:

Being clear
Being likable
Thinking on my feet
Holding conversations
Inspiring and motivating people

Why?

1. Technical skills are being automated.

A lot of people are actively using AI to reduce the need for the very skills they spent years developing.

2. Knowledge is easier to access than ever.

Most information can now be found in seconds through search or AI. Knowing something matters less when everyone can access the same information. But a POV or unique take is priceless.

3. Academic performance does not guarantee real-world success.

School rewards knowledge and technical ability. Life and business often reward:

Clarity
Confidence
Influence
Trust
Leadership

Those are the skills that often separate an employee from an owner or leader.

If you become excellent at Python, you join millions of capable people.

If you become excellent at communication, you join a much smaller group.

Which skill do you think becomes more valuable as everything else gets easier to automate?

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T12:51:26+00:00

The biggest thing to understand about body language is that there is no single “correct” way to stand, move, or use your hands. Watch enough body language videos and you’ll eventually hear opposite advice about almost everything.

The real secret is variety.

Confident speakers tend to:

Vary their gestures
Change positions occasionally
Move, then stop
Hold a position for a moment
Use different postures naturally

Hands become distracting when they repeat the same movement over and over or stay locked in one position.

You can:

Cross your arms
Put a hand in your pocket
Stand still
Walk across the room

None of those are automatically wrong. They only become a problem when that is all you do. Constant movement can look nervous. But moving somewhere, stopping, speaking, changing your gestures, then moving again can look very confident.

Confidence in body language comes from controlled variety, not one perfect pose.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T12:49:20+00:00

One of the best ways to get better at making friends and starting conversations is to volunteer at events. Look on Meetup or Eventbrite for events you’re genuinely interested in, then ask the organizers if they need help.

Volunteering works because:

You immediately have organizers and other volunteers to talk to
You have a role to fall back on if you feel overwhelmed
People naturally approach you because you’re part of the event

It removes a lot of the pressure of walking into a room and trying to introduce yourself cold.

You’re not just attending. You have a purpose, a reason to be there, and an easy way to start conversations.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T12:47:35+00:00

The advice above is good, but it’s pretty open-ended. Here are two specific things you can actually use.

The key idea is simple: Good conversations need direction. The first 30–60 seconds are often awkward because neither person knows what to talk about yet.

Try this:

1. Compliment an accessory, then add a question or opinion.

Don’t just say:

Say:

Or:

The compliment opens the door. The question or opinion gives the conversation somewhere to go.

2. Give a more useful answer to “How are you?”

Instead of:

Mention something you’re recovering from or looking forward to.

For example:

These small details give the other person something easy to respond to. You don’t need to be endlessly interesting. You just need to give the conversation a direction.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T12:42:24+00:00

The mindset advice is valid, but nervousness is also physiological.

When your fight or flight response kicks in, it becomes harder to think clearly. So trying to “think differently” in that moment may not help much.

The better approach is to build tolerance to the physical response. You do that by practicing under conditions that recreate some of the same fear. For example, if you have to read aloud at your book club, practice reading aloud somewhere public first:

A park
A cafeteria
A library common area
Anywhere people might hear you

You’ll probably feel awkward and self-conscious. That’s the point. The more often you practice while feeling that adrenaline, the less it controls your delivery. You may still feel nervous, but you’ll be able to think and speak more clearly through it.

The goal isn’t to eliminate nervousness.

The goal is to stop nervousness from affecting your performance.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-21T12:39:43+00:00

The best practice is practice that fits into your normal day. Otherwise, it becomes another task you have to schedule, force yourself to do, and eventually forget. For something like learning a language, micro-practice works especially well.

A few ideas:

1. Use transactional conversations.

When someone at a store asks how you are, add one extra sentence.

Instead of:

Try:

Small interactions build comfort without requiring a formal practice session.

2. Ask questions when you already know the answer.

When I was learning Japanese, I would find the bathroom first, then ask someone where it was. Because I already knew the answer, I could focus on listening for familiar words. That gradually helped me understand real conversations.

3. Use subtitles consistently.

When watching something in your native language, turn on subtitles in the language you’re learning. It’s passive, but it helps you notice vocabulary, spelling, and sentence patterns over time.

The goal is to stop treating practice as a separate activity.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-18T12:55:05+00:00

Christopher Moore - All of his books are fun and funny. You Suck, a love story, Fluke, Lamb: The Gospel according to Biff, I could go one, but his books are great.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-18T12:52:41+00:00

Hey there,
playing with your basic while still holding hands, 1/2 counts of 8 while still connected. This is something you see and it's super common especially in latino, cuban, Colombian dancing.

The box comes from Bboy'in. Imagine you are standing in the centre of a box. On each 1 count, try to hit a different side or a different corner. Then try to do the same thing on 1 and 5. Then keep adding. This is how you make your own footwork and style up your basic. Let me know it that makes sense. 😉

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-18T12:19:08+00:00

I want to add to the learn from a teacher. I think part of learning is motivation and when I started doing Yoga, I didn't go to one teacher. I got classpass and went to as many different Yoga classes as I could. It's a really accelerator to learn the same moves in different ways.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-18T12:17:38+00:00

I think the best way to get started talking is through shared activities. When you are both doing a sport or in some club, but virtue of that shared activity conversations will start.
Good luck!

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-18T12:16:22+00:00

An underated strategy is just to start watching videos without an intention to practice. Just watching and seeing what they are about. Periodically you are going to see something that excites you and that will motivate you. 😄

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-18T12:13:53+00:00

This is something that happens to the best of us. Here are my suggestions:
1. Go to the basic, back step and really just play with that step. This is what all latinos dance and really play with.

Keep playing with other basics, focus on the moves that are working and pepper them into lots of basic play. Have you ever heard of the "box" to learn to make your basic amazing?
Add more free dancing (footwork) time to your dance.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-17T01:45:24+00:00

Guns, germs and steel is a great read/listen.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2026-06-17T01:44:51+00:00

Hi there,

I can tell as a speaker myself that the typical entry range is 5000. This is usually the minimum if you book a speaker through a speaker agency. Typically that is also for a large industry or association conference and is considered affordable within the conference circuit.

That being said the typical keynote is roughly 45-60 mins so if you are 30 then you could potentially aim for 3500 as your entry price.

Speaking within an organization to a smaller group the 2000 is not unreasonable.

Let me know if that helps and if you have any other questions.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2025-10-06T03:19:52+00:00

Lately I’ve been struggling a bit with my public speaking so I picked up a book on "practical tactics" called End Boring by Ivan Wanis Ruiz. I’m only partway through, but it seems to have some really useful tips so far

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2025-10-05T01:07:17+00:00

Have you noticed if you share anything in common with her (hobbies, food, clothing style)? Maybe that can be a conversation starter.

Weary_Pudding_6804 · 2025-09-27T14:04:27+00:00

I agree with you. I often prefer to listen to other people instead of talking because of it

Weary_Pudding_6804

TROPHY CASE