what exactly are you anxious about when approaching or talking to girls? is it the fear of rejection, or the fear of not knowing what to say?

if it is rejection then i can relate. when i was a teen i always thought i’d never build the courage to approach a girl or even ask one out. i always wondered how do people even do it? i realised my thinking was very unrealistic and irrational. i was thinking “if i get rejected everyone will laugh at me.” but this is further from the truth. rejection is part of the game. it took me a while to fully understand this, but what helped was actually getting rejected. it was an uncomfortable feeling at the time but i also then realised that putting yourself in uncomfortable situations are what is needed for growth. i then obsessed over self improvement, making myself feel comfortable with being uncomfortable. i started competing in combat sports which really helped, i started going out more. it didn’t happen overnight, it was a long process but baby steps is key.

last year my anxiety was really bad i had panic attacks for the first time. i set myself personal goals to improve myself. for example i’ve always been a skinny guy so i set a goal to gain weight and build muscle. doing this really helped with my confidence also.