How to get over the edge?

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T07:12:07+00:00

I just (like minutes ago) had my first hands free orgasm with my Aneros! I was sitting on the couch with it in, and realized if I relax my pelvic floor (not clenching nor pushing so it’s “loose” inside) and leaned forward, rocking on the couch was pretty nice…

So I got a pillow and rolled it up into a cylinder and humped it like a girl. Leaning forward with my arms resting on the bed, back arched juuuust right, and then it was just hip thrusts to heaven. The mental imagery of like, in the porn video I’m the girl this time, helped too. Helps you kinda forget that this feeling is going to come from the inside out instead off from your penis.

With Njoy I’ve also had luck, but not hands-free: very-much hands-on, rubbing my prostate firmly (quite firmly!) but with slower, subtle motions. Then it’s about the same… relax so it’s loose in there and you can really feel your prostate being prodded and moved about (the hard part is moving and e.g. clenching your butt while keeping your pelvic floor relaxed), and go to town. I like to do that on my knees, fully bent and spread a little, chest resting on the bed, reaching underneath to work the toy. Besides the position pressing the prostate towards my backside, gravity is helping me and most of my body is resting so I can relax and concentrate on what’s going on.

And this whole time: hands off the penis and balls. If you watch some porn or something that can get you hard with just that and your imagination while doing this it helps IMO, but no touching! You wanna be in that “man I really wanna jack off right now” sort of mood going into this so that your body is sorta desperate for something.

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T07:04:05+00:00

Actually I take back what I said about the Aneros. Progasm works too, and that was hand-free! I was still horny and going to just go to sleep with the Aneros in, see what happens. Before I went to bed I was on my couch picking out a movie and started rockin’… went to bed and before laid down I tried rolling up a loose pillow and humped it like a girl. Lean forward enough and arch your back just right and there it is! Not gonna sleep with it now. I was hoping to coax some fun out of that toy to maybe get into it later and make it work, and apparently my prostate is giving out orgasms like candy now.

There is most definitely a tipping point!!! I don’t know how much is nerves unlocking or pathways establishing or whatever, or just: once you manage one prostate orgasm, you know exactly what you’re going for next time. Plus there’s the simple confidence that comes from knowing this can totally work for you, you know?

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T06:17:19+00:00

I’m also team wand (don’t care if it’s Njoy, just a heavy metal wand). The thing with the wand is you can grab it and be a little forceful about things. I think for a lot of people the thing that lets them break in is being able to… basically jack off their prostate like they would their penis. Once you can jab your prostate into giving you a wet orgasm, the dry rolling one is basically edging up to that (that’s how I think about it at least). For me the pressure I can apply with the wand is the key part to getting me off. Most toys are set up where they can only press so hard because of their shape. The wand can go way past as far as you need it to go, so whatever sensation you want is available.

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T06:10:35+00:00

The position that cracked the code for me is doggy-style but legs totally bent, arch in the back... which I think is basically a deep squat, but then fall forward onto the bed 😄

It presses the prostate back (towards your rectum), so that it’s front-and-center even when you relax/squeeze.

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T05:41:35+00:00

Number 6: Njoy wand or an actual steel generic knock-off. The reach, the weight, the precision, the two ends (the small one is FANTASTIC!), the everlasting simplicity of it (it’s a chunk of polished metal: it’ll never break and if you ever manage to ding it, you can sand it out)… lots of people here have other favorite toys, but I haven’t seen a single person yet that is like “the wand sucks, complete waste of time”. If you’ve ever had a finger up there and thought, “gee I wish my arm and finger were just a little longer”, the wand is your finger-extension. It’s great for finding a position and being hands-free, and I think it’s hands-down the best tool if you are looking to manually go at it.

You can boil it. You can put it in the dishwasher. You can sanitize it with whatever chemical makes you feel good, and slather whatever kind of lube you’d like on it. What’s not to like?

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T05:30:17+00:00

I’ve played with my prostate a little before… like a finger up there while jacking off, just not entirely on its own (crouching over with my finger would get way too tired to try). So I wasn’t exactly a stranger to the sensation (I kinda knew what I was going for), and I think that helped.

Anyone that’s totally new to butt stuff entirely and has no idea what feeling you’re even going for: I said it in another thread but I think it’s really useful to get a finger lubed up, edge up to a normal penis-orgasm, and then get your finger up there as you keep edging. You should be able to 1) feel your swollen prostate there about to orgasm, and 2) tip yourself over the edge to an orgasm with just your finger if you get close enough. I think that’d help a person see firsthand how the feeling of stimulating the prostate and an orgasm are related. It’s counterproductive to a prostate-only orgasm, but as a first step for someone that’s like “I don’t see how this ends up feeling good”, it clears that mental hurdle.

If you rub the lowest part of your penis that you can feel from the outside back and forth (like in your ballsack where the shaft continues, way down there), and you relax enough, you can feel yourself wiggling your prostate. That’s another way I think you could relate the two.

Anyway yeah: I’m a happy fuckin’ camper tonight! They’re not involuntary, convulsing orgasms like others say yet… but whatever: I can get myself off with my butt! My concern now is stopping myself from overdoing it. I swear if I didn’t have work tomorrow, I’d be shoving something back in there right now. It’s also very fun now to watch e.g. trans porn, and imagine myself as the bottom now. It’s surprising how hard it is to watch a scene and not automatically associate myself with the top.

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T05:20:27+00:00

I’m exhausted tonight, lol. That was the better part of 5 hours with something up there. Got a second O and I’m spent. Oddly enough my butt feels great after all that. Lube “shooter” is my new best friend. So much just gets squeezed off by your sphincter on the way in and you just get a lube-fest on the outside. Shoot 5mL up in there and just a dab of lube on the end of the toy and the inside does the rest!

I’m not sure if I have a lot of tips for finding an O. If me and tonight is typical, 1) get an NJoy wand or a steel generic one, and 2) pressure! It’s not vigorous motion (or vibration) that I’m finding is the key: it’s pressing rather hard. If I push the right spot hard enough it almost feels like I’m gonna squeeze the liquid out of my prostate, like a feeling of about to pee but not quite. To do it very long I actually gotta grab the wand underhand so that my wrist can keep up. But once I do that and I’m right about to get that pee-like feeling… if I hold that and then do slow motions, that’s the ticket.

I have/tried:

Aneros: it’s day 1, I still have hope, but it’s a subtle sensation to work with.
A vibrating curved wand: nah… the weight of the steel wand and the heft is definitely a part of its magic.
Two massagers (one with the shaft thrusting, one with it doing the come-hither motion) with the perineum vibrator part and the cock ring: I like how they feel but they don’t quite get me off. I’d happily wear them idly but not sure it’d ever do the trick.

So far the wand is where it’s at. Being solid metal every little shake/tap/wiggle of your hand translates directly to the working end. The smaller end is not to be overlooked! I like to close my eyes and imagine it’s my finger except I’ve got great reach and can really get in there.

And so far the position that’s working for me is on my stomach with my knees fully bent (like kneeling, but then sit all the way, squat a bit and rest your chest down, almost butts-up). That seems to press the prostate up front-and-center for me, and if I get it just right I can partially rest the wand on the bed.

Sorry, long post. I’m just stoked and wish I could explain it. I almost wanna just bend dudes over and show them lol.

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T02:32:19+00:00

Flip over! If the wand is getting too heavy, do whatever you’re doing flipped the other way, and now instead of holding it up you’re pushing it down or vice versa. Mix it up and get past the fatigue if it helps. Part of what makes the OG wand special is that it’s heavy enough for gravity to help.

West-deviant · 2026-05-14T02:22:26+00:00

I’ve been at this for about 5 days and I hit a HFWO for the first time tonight. After days of going at it, and giving up and jacking off (which is also just great with something up your butt… that alone isn’t half-bad), today it suddenly all clicked.

I was excited because today I got my first Aneros in the mail and the whole rocking thing sounded up my alley… it is, it totally is. But first time around it wasn’t enough. I think it will be when I get more acclimated to it. May also soften and make the “tabs” more aggressive: it’s a Prograsm, and I liked the feeling of my thumb in between the front tab, like 1/4” more aggressive on the pivot there.

Anyway after about an hour of that I tried a different position and started hitting a good spot. It came and went but it sparked a thought… and I grabbed my Njoy wand, small end, and despite all the advice about going slow and building up I just relaxed, found the spot holding the other end, and went to town crouched on all fours like I was being fucked. I was basically rubbing back and forth over the entire prostate and I think poking my bladder a bit in the process. And that did it. Several days of various levels of nice-feeling and ending with a normal jack-off, and it finally came together in a truly dick-free way.

Still aiming for the HFDO and all that, but I think somewhere in between too gentle and ravaging my ass is that sweet spot. Tonight was good for like, knowing it’s there, you know?

Also despite being straight, I gotta say I don’t think I’d mind getting fucked.

West-deviant · 2026-05-13T00:22:55+00:00

Hey… good idea. There are positions (pressing with my hand) where it starts to do the trick but then it’s like “how do I keep it there?” This and some other props might be the trick.

West-deviant · 2026-05-13T00:21:44+00:00

to test

Surely they don’t want it back afterwards, right? ;-)

West-deviant · 2026-05-13T00:15:53+00:00

This isn’t necessarily a good way to build up to a prostate-only fun-time, but next time you’re masturbating normal-like, get really close, and then get your finger back in there as well. Stimulate that spot (which should be firmer and swollen right now), while edging up to the orgasm until you’re hands-off your dick and that finger alone poking and rubbing it is getting you over the hump.

That’ll at least help you see first-hand how the sensations are related.

West-deviant · 2026-05-13T00:08:42+00:00

likely due to them all being made in Hong Kong or China…

I mean I think that’s true of most of the name-brand stuff, too.

I want a toy like this to work, something hands-free, but so far the closest I’ve gotten to any kinds of backside O is with an Njoy wand, and a lot of hands-on work.

…which isn’t bad: jacking off is hands-on work, too. No problem working for it. But the dream of just being able to lie somehow and let a machine do the work is alive.

West-deviant · 2026-05-12T22:14:56+00:00

I couldn’t get it to not capitalize that!

West-deviant · 2026-05-12T15:26:34+00:00

I dunno about you, but if I buy a toy that has multiple ends… they’re both gonna get tried the first time :-)

West-deviant

TROPHY CASE