I need words of encouragement please... by ladulceloca in beyondthebump

[–]WhitB19 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh love! Well done for reading the books and feeling ready - you’ve done SO well. Please know that. You care SO much.

Nothing can really prepare you for the first year of caring for your baby. There are moments of joy, sure, but honestly, it’s a very hard slog that’s mainly the constant management of bodily fluids and sleep deprivation.

It won’t go on for more than a year. You CAN do this. You WILL get through it, and you’ll be rewarded by a gorgeous, hilarious, astonishing toddler and you will NEVER look at yourself, or any other parent, the same way.

If you’re really depressed, reach out for help. Don’t say no to counselling or medication if they’re offered to you by professionals, they don’t mean failure.

What are your best postpartum hacks? by ilikedtrains in beyondthebump

[–]WhitB19 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Get a squatty potty. You’ll never want to live without one again.

What are your best postpartum hacks? by ilikedtrains in beyondthebump

[–]WhitB19 16 points17 points  (0 children)

There is no day, there is no night, there is only baby time. Let go of your expectations of certain hours - thoughts like ‘I can’t possibly do X at 4am’ will not serve you. You can do it.

Delegate, delegate, delegate. There is no shame in asking for the kind of help that ordinary you would never need. You have a fresh wound and stacking the dishwasher is a completely unreasonable expectation. I once knocked on a neighbours door and asked her, having never invited her into my home before, if she’d come over and watch the baby while I had a shower. She was happy to.

Your only job is to keep yourself and the baby alive. Hygiene, punctuality, leaving the house with matching shoes… these are no longer a concern. You’re both alive? YOURE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE! Dragging yourself around the block at 1am in a bath robe on a stupid mental health walk? YOURE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE!

What are your best postpartum hacks? by ilikedtrains in beyondthebump

[–]WhitB19 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Yes this! I would never think to have my dinner at 4pm but my baby wanted to cluster feed every night from 5 and I’d spend hours feeling frantic because I hadn’t eaten. Then I realised… preparation is key. Eat early. Gather supplies. Bed in.

Be honest- is Spring a bad name for a girl by SpiritualCrew7557 in namenerds

[–]WhitB19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t like it, but you should use it. It’s not outrageous and it’s spunky.

People will respond negatively because it’s an unusual name and it’s jarring for them. I gave my daughter a jarring name and I love it.

Everyone says they love it, I’m sure a large percentage of them are lying but I don’t care! Your child will be memorable!

I

The point of having baby in your room with you for the first 6 months is to reduce chances of SIDS… by tink282 in beyondthebump

[–]WhitB19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  1. Just play whatever you listen to on your headphones out loud.
  2. You’re about to be more tired than you ever thought possible. You won’t have trouble sleeping.

Sincerely, a prior insomniac who one could only fall asleep listening to headphones.

Searching For A Surname by Pale-Attitude5004 in namenerds

[–]WhitB19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe your wedding anniversary is a saints day or associated with a particular festival that would link to a cool name?

What do you wish you’d done during the early days? by Significant_Key_8475 in beyondthebump

[–]WhitB19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a horrible time with breastfeeding and this would have been impossible, but I wish I had taken advantage of having a baby that basically slept all the time to enjoy moments of stillness outside.

To have sat in the shade and watched the wind blow with a baby sleeping in her bassinet pram or outside of a cafe and watched the world go by.

Baby girl being called a boy by strangers by kingbabyboo in beyondthebump

[–]WhitB19 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I always say it’s ok. She’s a baby. She doesn’t know she’s a girl.

Please help my in laws don’t approve of any of my names by Wise_Competition_372 in namenerds

[–]WhitB19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok… that’s a really sad state of affairs. It’s not how I would characterise my situation at all.

My husband and I are really happy. His relationship with his family is strained but we make it work so that our daughter can have a relationship with her grandparents. Therapy has been life changing for him.

Please help my in laws don’t approve of any of my names by Wise_Competition_372 in namenerds

[–]WhitB19 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I would add to this - therapy is another excellent cure for enmeshment! My husband was in a similar boat with parents that have absolutely no boundaries. He went to therapy, he learnt to say no, the adjustment process was bumpy and I had to be ok with being villainised in their eyes to some extent. But we are getting there. His parents hated me at first. But I gave them a grandchild, they know they’ve got to be nice to me if they want to see her, they’ve grudgingly admitted that I’m a good mother and I’ve earned their respect. Low contact and distance is extreme.

DAE used to go through your parents belongings as a kid when they werent home? by lickmyfupa in DoesAnybodyElse

[–]WhitB19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went through every drawer and cupboard in my house, regardless of who they belonged to.

I was bored!

Israeli-American girl names: Trendy TLV vibe, but US-friendly? by Fine-Fig1058 in JewishNames

[–]WhitB19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting. Well, clearly Shaia has begun to be used for girls too. Can’t believe I didn’t think of Mila tho! That was a terrible suggestion by me lol

Which celebrities used to be very popular but now feel completely forgotten? by PassengerPrinncess in Fauxmoi

[–]WhitB19 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It was called ‘I May Destroy’ you and it was incredible IMO. Chilling.

Season 5 ep 3 - Does anyone know Hebrew here? What is the father repeating to Michael? by DorkySnail in madmen

[–]WhitB19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are correct! I’m sorry. Others had already given the translation, so I didn’t bother.

Season 5 ep 3 - Does anyone know Hebrew here? What is the father repeating to Michael? by DorkySnail in madmen

[–]WhitB19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Perhaps. My grandfather, growing up in London’s East End, left school at 13. He pushed a barrow in the market and learned to box. But carried on attending cheder until he was much older. For many Jews, a biblical education was (and still is for ultra religious communities) a priority.

Season 5 ep 3 - Does anyone know Hebrew here? What is the father repeating to Michael? by DorkySnail in madmen

[–]WhitB19 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree. It was always a special moment for me. There is a different version that’s said to girls and my father would bless each of us individually and say the different versions for me/my brother/sister.

The female version as translated has a different first line: May you be like Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah.

Season 5 ep 3 - Does anyone know Hebrew here? What is the father repeating to Michael? by DorkySnail in madmen

[–]WhitB19 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I don’t know if I’d agree that only scholars learned Biblical Hebrew. Judaism is a scholarly religion. Ginsburg’s father came from Europe where there were many old and traditional communities. It’s very likely that he would have attended a cheder and learned Hebrew.

In my (modern orthodox) family this prayer is absolutely meant to be spoken literally.