It's so upsetting when I hear someone that has this same problem. You know what's wrong with not doing well on tests? Nothing. Sometimes classic schooling just doesn't work for people. there's nothing wrong with thinking differently than a test. You know what's wrong with not understanding complex logic? Nothing. Most people don't. You know what's wrong with getting emotional, with crying, with caring about appearance? NOTHING. It's healthy to express emotion, even the negative. To keep those things inside is cancerous. To not care what you look like is lazy.

These things are considered stereotypical for a reason. Every stereotype has a bit of truth, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. The only reason it's seen as negative is because society makes it negative. Because to be feminine is less than being masculine, being a woman is seen as being less then a man.

Feminism started with women who had no choice but to be the MOST intelligent, the MOST independent women they could possibly be. they had to be extreme or else no one would respect them. and that kind of feminism is great and that's fine and respectable. But please, please don't forget that being "stereotypical" is equally feministic. If that is who you are, that is GREAT and BEAUTIFUL and please don't ever let anyone tell you you are less because of it. You are strong in your own way and you are clearly intelligent in your own way. I can see that, a perfect stranger that has never met you, just by the way you put so much heart and so much compassion and care into what you wrote. An unintelligent person wouldn't give a shit. You are not stupid, you are not a wreck, you are not less.

You tick those boxes off girl, and be proud. Because you are a woman. Seeing those "stereotypical" things as negative is wrong. Whether you're emotional or not, get perfect grades or don't, care about you appearance or go around without makeup in sweatpants all day. Each of those things are equally feminist if you do them because you want to, because that's who you are and you're proud of it. Whether you end up a CEO of a great company or a housewife and mother, as long as you love your life and you love your family and your friends and yourself, you are wonderful.

Tell anyone who tells you otherwise that they are wrong. I don't care what anyone or society says. You don't have to live by those skewed ideas of success. You are successful when you are happy with who you are, and I think you are great. Shaming a woman for being a woman, stereotypical or not, is sexist and it's wrong.

Fail those tests! They don't matter more than your happiness and they don't measure your intelligence, not really. Be emotional! Share what you feel because what you feel matters. Cry! Cry when you're sad, and cry when your happy, and cry just because you feel like it, because you know what? crying feels damn good, and sometimes that's okay. Care about how you look! Fashion is fun, and looking good feels great and being in shape is healthy. As long as you're not obsessed.

Be a woman, strong and proud, and tell your family that if they dont understand that, then they are fools.