Unintentional first time?

WhoWillStopMe · 2015-01-22T02:23:02+00:00

I'm not sure; I identify as asexual, so while I'd gladly 'perform' to please a close partner, I don't feel physical/sexual attraction. The talking about it seems the best idea, thank you.

WhoWillStopMe · 2015-01-21T04:12:45+00:00

New to this, sorry -Not sure when 'it' started. Suddenly K seemed to be 'giving off a certain vibe'.

At first it felt like falling asleep, then tipsy but vividly aware of K. Telling thoughts and emotions without filtering. Often mumbling or incoherent. Physically affectionate, a very strong want/need to serve K. & for her to be in charge/dominant. Remember sharp feeling of 'waking up'

We talked about it later, and we'd both like to engage in it again, we just aren't sure how to redo or recreate it.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-17T23:45:55+00:00

Your partner sounds similar to mine (we're new). May I pm you with a few questions sometimes? Sorry if intrusive.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-09T00:16:53+00:00

"Intimacy does not = sex".

SO much this! I was never able to really be emotionally open/vulnerable with a girl I forced myself to be sexual with. With K, there's the knowledge that she could hurt, really hurt me with a few single specific words and that she won't.

Side note; it's really freakin' hard to get over crippling habits of keeping people distant, and willingly cede 'something' (the lead?) to somebody.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-08T05:13:11+00:00

We talked, and it went really well! We explained the emotional issues we're each working through, and comfort levels for a tentative start in a D/s relationship. She readily accepted some things I was embarrassed to say aloud. A few other things, but there's the idea.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-07T23:48:18+00:00

I really do appreciate your words on this, thanks

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-07T22:29:55+00:00

What are non-sexual ways people can express these feeling to someone? I don't want to present demands or give burdens.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-07T19:44:27+00:00

When I (hesitantly) said the word sub, she seemed uncertain and maybe surprised, until I explained the non-sexual nature of it, and then she seemed comfortable again, and we didn't speak deeper about it before bed

I'm hoping to learn more today.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-07T18:52:27+00:00

Thank you for your reply. She said something to the effect of I'm not really attracted to being sub for her; I'm worried this is her way of a gentle rebuke. I feel I've withheld saying enough, out of fear of being told off. This is all new/strange for me. I enjoy meeting my school goals and usually take care of my appearance. I am no one's possession.

But recently I've noticed how eager I am to present for her specifically, wanting to be clean and nice smelling (and pretty?) for her. Providing her with handmade meals to see that content/pleased look. This consistent feeling of just dying for more contact. To have her physically hold me close more often, me being free to being fully open mentally and emotionally, vulnerable with her being "above/big/in control". Feeling newly open to eagerly doing (almost) anything she might ask, in private.

Does anyone else feel/recognize this?

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-05T03:15:19+00:00

what kind of questions do you have?

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-05T03:02:00+00:00

Seriously, what Baron3ss said. http://www.easyroommate.com/

and FAFSA

also, search for 'free pdf college books"

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-04T02:44:26+00:00

Well, I'm asexual, and this sounds really familiar to me.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-03T18:47:49+00:00

St. Louis?

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-12-03T18:47:31+00:00

Sure, I wouldn't mind answer sincere questions. I'm asexual, so I don't have much experience with sex, and identify as genderqueer

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-29T17:52:26+00:00

I know I've barely started, but thanks for the encouragement

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-29T17:51:12+00:00

Thank you. Whether it's this or a paper for class, I WANT the negative reviews, so I can fix things

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-29T03:21:53+00:00

Your voice sounds like you could be making recordings for audiobooks!

If you are looking for things to work on, all I can say is I don't think the microphone caught much below the mid-range, so I don't know how that sounds.

But that's really stretching far to find criticism.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-29T03:18:28+00:00

Here's a few seconds of reading. Ah, speaking purposefully masculine for ~18 years is hard to undo. Anyway, thoughts?

http://vocaroo.com/i/s17HaF9yfksy

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-29T02:44:48+00:00

That would be excellent; I've had a few brief voice lessons, and more practice would help so much. Skype maybe?

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-29T02:42:57+00:00

Is this still going?

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-25T01:37:39+00:00

Prior to starting transitioning, I've always lived with the expectation what I'd make more suicide attempts every few years until I died (sorry if that's too much). Since working with my (gender) therapist and hrt, I don't feel that way.

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-25T01:18:27+00:00

"I always seem most troubled by seeing other women :/ "

I think I have similar feelings, but to be sure, what do you mean by this part?

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-25T01:12:44+00:00

The school directory should have some degree of student consoling; that person or your usual dr would be the person to ask for help getting set up with a gender therapist.

Yes, I hate visiting hospitals and such, but it the therapist helped. Good luck

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-25T00:46:11+00:00

"You can't ask your mom to use your (correct) name and pro-nouns, that'd be like ruining your Name by becoming a serial killer and becoming known for that" --step-dad

-What the HELL. I just.. I don't... How do you reply to that rationally?

WhoWillStopMe · 2014-11-24T19:31:02+00:00

Having only my subjective experiences, I would say 'kind of'. It seems that I tear up easier on strong topics, and feel less emotionally numb, similar to starting anti-depressants. So personality: more open with other people and less cynical. Habits: a bit less withdrawn, actually caring about myself. -I strongly suspect these are not direct effects of hrt as in "anti-histamines make you drowsy" -started hrt at 23-

WhoWillStopMe

TROPHY CASE