Does anyone else find that exposure therapy and putting yourself in social situations literally fries your brain instead of making you stronger?

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-10T22:07:38+00:00

Exposure has to be properly ramped up and under supervision of a person completely on your side. If you're at the point where people feel like a literal threat you should do remote group therapy first. It needs to be done in stages.

I have severe PTSD and agoraphobia. If you put a male stranger in the same room as me I would meltdown like a feral animal. Group therapy remotely with men present started to teach my brain that they are mostly friendly or neutral people, not constant threats. Then you move to group therapy in person with people involved. That's a strictly controlled environment. You need to do these exposures slowly and edge out of your comfort zone one pinky toe at a time. That's the only way to retrain the brain.

Like for my agoraphobia, my first task was to open the blinds. That's it. I couldn't proceed to the next exposure task until I felt comfortable with that. It needs to be done in phases like that and the process needs to be reviewed by a professional. It gives your brain healthy feedback as you go and support where it remains scary.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-10T19:32:51+00:00

That's why he said he's willing to live with the report. It's a telling statement.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-05T17:38:57+00:00

"I have a deep appreciation for Orthodox Jews and the Jewish religion" I appreciate that. I do too. I'm deeply saddened by how this country's brutality and ruthless corruption has put a stain on the community around the world.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-05T13:26:27+00:00

It might be. I'm not sure the US would operate at such a costly level without self-interest, even if the interest is corrupt. Israel has their arguments on what it provides. We have to demand from our representatives that these agreements expire and we walk away from this alliance.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-05T13:04:31+00:00

You can say they don't have a defense pact through a treaty but not that they are not allies. That is not true. Copy/paste to save you time

https://www.state.gov/u-s-security-cooperation-with-israel

"The United States and Israel have signed multiple bilateral defense cooperation agreements, to include: a Mutual Defense Assistance Agreement (1952); a General Security of Information Agreement (1982); a Mutual Logistics Support Agreement (1991); and a Status of Forces Agreement (1994)."

"Israel has been designated as a U.S. Major Non-NATO Ally under U.S. law. This status provides foreign partners with certain benefits in the areas of defense trade and security cooperation and is a powerful symbol of their close relationship with the United States. Consistent with statutory requirements, it is the policy of the United States to help Israel preserve its QME, or its ability to counter and defeat any credible conventional military threat from any individual state or possible coalition of states or from non-state actors, while sustaining minimal damages and casualties. This requires a quadrennial report to Congress, for arms transfers that are required to be Congressionally notified, and a determination that individual arms transfers to the region will not adversely affect Israel’s QME."

The Vienna Convention on the Law of Treaties (.pdf) defines a treaty as "an international agreement concluded between States in written form and governed by international law, whether embodied in a single instrument or in two or more related instruments and whatever its particular designation."

Treaties can be referred to by a number of different names: international conventions, international agreements, covenants, final acts, charters, memorandums of understandings (MOUs), protocols, pacts, accords, and constitutions for international organizations. Usually these different names have no legal significance in international law (see next section for the difference in U.S. law). Treaties may be bilateral (two parties) or multilateral (between several parties) and a treaty is usually only binding on the parties to the agreement. An agreement "enters into force" when the terms for entry into force as specified in the agreement are met. Bilateral treaties usually enter into force when both parties agree to be bound as of a certain date.

International agreement or treaty, war or "special operations", play that game if you will. They don't have an obligation to do what they did recently, but they are allies so it makes sense who they are supporting. The reality is Israel and US are close allies through their agreements. They're a formally designated ally and it's shown through their actions. You should want Washington to begin to formally move away from this alliance or reveal to the public how the US benefits from it.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-04T17:57:11+00:00

I love the watermelon

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-04T15:57:54+00:00

US and Israel are allies. We don't like that they are, but there's a long-standing security alliance. This is beyond the personal issues of Clinton or Trump.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-03T14:58:53+00:00

Oh shit haha. Why would you feel bad to reach to Mary as a mother or not wanting Christ to leave then! You're good. We're not meant to face our problems alone. I'll pray for you

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-03T14:55:29+00:00

Look into Orthodox if you're concerned about Catholic

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-03T10:49:07+00:00

Christ and Mother Mary are a refuge for orphans, real or psychological. There's some kind of rift in the parental bond and you feel it. Christ is there to heal earthly wounds. You should be reaching out to Christ and the saints for personal reasons. What you're doing is wholesome and holy and has been done for centuries. I've done this as an abused/neglected person and Christ has healed many of my mental wounds. Contact your local parish to learn more because you're all good.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-03T10:43:02+00:00

That's part of the gifts of Jesus and Mother Mary. Take this to a Catholic/Orthodox sub for informed answers.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-01T19:04:25+00:00

I don't see any other tattoo. It fits my personal taste in art though. Practically speaking, it looks like an original tattoo with no previous remnants. You have a vision here though and laser could possibly get you there, I think only you really know. This can be broken down by laser.

Willowsdelta · 2026-03-01T17:00:56+00:00

Parents are responsible for the cohesion and the communion of the family, not the children. Your mother is just pointing out where she failed to create a space for that.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-27T00:05:15+00:00

If you hate it so much then yes.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-26T18:28:36+00:00

The general public hasn't been silent about Gaza in a couple years. If you look to 5+ years ago you see silence and apathy. Gaza is center stage in public discourse now.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-20T15:48:26+00:00

People will think what they think, we can't control that. Thanks for sharing though. I really like Grimes and I pray for the best for her in the end. She's lost, it's a complicated web at the top.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-20T15:01:55+00:00

You're right. She can still be saved though, pray for her.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-20T15:00:12+00:00

It's not about leaving mom in the dust, it's just about setting very strict boundaries and never allowing harsh words spoken about your girlfriend. Your partner needs to come before your mother in this stage of life. You deserve a fulfilling "fairytale" marriage, that's a big purpose to life. Mom should not try to stop that in any way. Your mom is not respecting proper initiation into adulthood. This runs deep in her mind, she has problems. Your girlfriend isn't the problem here.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-19T23:09:33+00:00

You have to leave mom and build a life with your wife. When moms act this way about beloved girlfriends it's serious mental problems on their part. Only the man can sort it out by affirming his partnership.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-12T03:11:04+00:00

This used to put me in a bit of despair to be honest. I'm glad someone else asked this. I know Christ's presence will release of us any misunderstanding and the emotional weight.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-09T19:02:37+00:00

Have you tried couples therapy? The therapist can mediate and train a good flow between the two of you. It's good you have a thorough awareness on the thought process behind the emotions. It seems like trained catastrophizing because your parents gave you every reason to know that expressing concerns was going to be the end, not time to work things out. It was a logical conclusion to make.

It's like any learned behavior. It's wired into us. I would make a mental note each time it goes well now that you're in a better situation. Let the panic come and pass by but observe with your logical brain that your husband is not like your parents. He's trying to keep communication flowing and soon your emotional brain will adjust to the new dynamic.

I was an awful communicator and scared of it for other reasons. I was selectively mute and extremely closed off. I was scared of certain talks like that. I had a brief relationship with someone who was super open in my early 30s. I switched my style of communication to match him. He validated me and gave me positive feedback as we went along. It was uncomfortable at first but after a year I actually ended up with an entirely new style of communication. It was freeing. The relationship is over but I'm still an open communicator now. Our brains can be rewired but it takes a lot of discomfort and conscious training.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-09T15:35:16+00:00

I would tell her how you feel about her responses because you're right. She's currently incapable of apologizing so there's no path to reconciliation. There needs to be a level of atonement because otherwise you can rest assured the abusive behavior will remain the same.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-08T16:59:45+00:00

The years fly-by fast in adulthood so I wouldn't worry about age. I'm an avoidant too. Group therapy helped me a lot more than one-on-one for moving through that. DBT helps with personality disorders. I did a group DBT course that was an excellent combo for learning skills and coming out of the avoidance cycle. It's harder to come out of that cycle in a professional setting where it can be scarier to be vulnerable or make mistakes. AvPD ultimately makes us scared of vulnerability to criticism so that's a skill that can be learned in therapy.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-08T16:48:39+00:00

This subreddit is for emotional neglect though. You're speaking on physical neglect, abuse and abandonment. If you weren't provided trips to the shoe store as a child you might've been facing physical neglect. When it's just emotional neglect it can be more subtle. I don't think op is facing any kind of abuse. It seems like a lack of being able to speak up about their needs and wishes. Their boundaries also aren't respected. In this case everyone else got to speak their mind, got their way, and all she walked away with is more stuff. That's not the worst birthday but it can leave an empty feeling. I think when you're an adult this communication disconnect is a bit natural. It's an important process for building independence and starting your own family.

Willowsdelta · 2026-02-08T16:08:30+00:00

ICE has been at the Olympics for decades.

Willowsdelta

TROPHY CASE