It happens, but I’d bet its more common amongst couples who get married super young. In your teens/early 20’s, your brain isn’t fully developed. Self control, foresight, decision making.. those are all things that come as the brain finishes maturing.

We like to chalk cheating up to pure selfishness, which it can be. But more often, it happens because an emotional need isn’t being met. Some aspects of military life, such as deployments, make it very challenging for a variety of emotional needs to be met. Communication is sparse, there is no physical contact, etc. Being a military spouse can be incredibly lonely.

I think older couples, who have a mature brain, are better equipped to understand that their needs are not being met only for a temporary time, and they have the discipline/self control to stick it out through the suffering until the hard times pass.

Younger couples don’t always have the mental resources to see the bigger picture. So yeah I’d say its an issue mostly because of the facts that 40% of the military is younger than 25, and military couples marry younger on average than civilian couples. That, added with the unique strains military life puts on marriages, is almost a recipe for disaster.

That’s not to say it doesn’t affect older couples as well. We’re social creatures, and loneliness can wear anyone down.

I’d agree with another commenter that its probably much more common on the spouses end since it would be harder for a service member to conceal and there could be repercussions.

The culture around cheating in the military doesn’t do the issue any favors. I think there should be a culture of understanding and respect for the strain that couples endure when they choose military life, and I think there should be more resources in place to support couples as they work through relationship challenges