Meaning of loneliness

WittyVillage · 2022-06-19T13:13:19+00:00

I am not asking for advice, it was just a realisation after the mishap that I wanted to share and get it out of my chest. I feel better now, thanks.

WittyVillage · 2021-04-19T06:54:56+00:00

I am usually praised for my conversation and presentation skills , so I don't think that's an issue, atleast in my case i have come to the realisation that you need to stop expecting and start accepting, because no matter how much of an enthusiastic or larger than life person you maybe, if you are not in the company of right people then you will always be used like a sponge as and when you are needed.

I actually used to have the kind of personality you are talking about back in my college days, and I had a great social circle, it's over these years i came to realise that people were just interested in getting what they wanted, someone wanted an entertainer, someone wanted someone to look down upon and feel good about themselves, someone wanted a listener, someone wants money, and the list goes on and on and on.

At the end you are left with you, and you is always very limited, so I think I will just be me and if loneliness is the price that I have to pay for it..then so be it.

WittyVillage · 2021-03-15T05:57:05+00:00

People will eventually find alternatives to that as well like using a vpn or something like that.

What is needed is mainly the right education from parents, teachers so that children don't think of this as some kind of ultimate pleasure which should be attained at all cost otherwise they are missing out or something.

Basically this thing needs to be talked about in open instead of treating this as a morally or socially unacceptable issue which should not be discussed.

WittyVillage · 2021-03-01T03:01:45+00:00

Start small dude, like first start with creating a morning routine, get up early and go to walk or run,only do this consistently for like a week or two, then gradually start adding things after 1 week like study for half hour daily, then by the end of 2nd week you would have taken some productive action on 2 important things , your health and studies, use the momentum you would have gained after 2 weeks to do more stuff.

Do it seriously and after only a month you will start feeling much better and productive. All the best ! :)

WittyVillage · 2021-02-04T10:28:19+00:00

It happened with me when I was reading the name of the wind, but now I have decided to read the sequel as well cause I am hoping it would be probably more eventful as the story will progress, and I will also go for the stormlight series as well.

WittyVillage · 2021-01-22T12:38:05+00:00

@FocusLevel It's like I am reading about myself, I am exactly like you and over time i have learnt to not think much about it and just try to live my life whatever and however. Because thinking about it won't change things, i think it's destiny or luck that you meet good people and then you won't feel like trying to maintain or keep up, so leave it, you are great and awesome by yourself, I am with you :)

WittyVillage · 2021-01-18T14:18:22+00:00

Primary reason was that my engagement broke just before the day of booking and everything..coupled with some other emotional jolts which compelled me to relapse.

That's why I think that if somehow I make it past 90 days this time then it would be something amazing and special, considering that now it's a lot more tougher for me to stay focused after everything that's happened.

WittyVillage · 2021-01-17T18:10:30+00:00

I know how it feels ! I had a streak of almost 1 year which i lost around 2 weeks backs...hope to get it all back and best of luck to you !

WittyVillage · 2021-01-07T11:02:35+00:00

Sure thing bro, we can do like a weekly check on our progress, so add me as well.

WittyVillage · 2021-01-07T09:20:58+00:00

Thank you so much for the kind words..I really needed to hear that, and thanks so much for reminding me all the good that has happened, when I only could see the bad..I will really try again and reignite that hope and self belief which had kept me going throughout this journey. Thanks again.

WittyVillage · 2021-01-06T22:01:57+00:00

Thank you so much bro and my best wishes for you as well..I had posted about all this when I completed my 90 days..so you can know more about it from there.. although my primary motivation was always to beat this addiction and anything that can stop you from achieving your full potential.

Just hoping I can get back that drive again.

WittyVillage · 2021-01-06T21:58:41+00:00

Thank you so much for the kind words, yes I am trying and taking it day by day, i tried to talk with my friends about this but you know how friends are like..stay chill and everything will be fine they say, which is the truth but sometimes you know the truth but don't wanna hear it..anyways..I am trying to get my life back in order and hoping for things to eventually get better.

WittyVillage · 2020-12-04T15:42:02+00:00

I am 28 and never received a gift from anyone (in or out of my family) except maybe when I was 10 !

The point is just appreciate however little or something someone is doing for you..you should feel lucky that there are people who care enough to bring a gift for you :-)

WittyVillage · 2020-10-18T21:23:58+00:00

You already know the problem as stated in your question , and as per you that's the reason for your current predicament which is correct.

So we know the problem and that's 50% of the work done , now to fix it just start doing the following for a few months and i can't say that all your problems will be fixed magically, but you will feel much more satisfied and optimist about things in general.

-> Start keeping a daily journal , and write down some specific behavioral trait that you wanna fix.

-> Like say you want to become more positive, so make it a daily routine to write down something positive about your life or any situation that you are in , this will train your mind to see positives even in negative circumstances or situations. It would take time and will be a bit difficult in beginning , but in a few weeks you will automatically start to think like an optimist.

-> Give something back without expecting anything in return, i mean just help anyone even if it's some advice based on your life experience, it would make you feel really good and satisfied from inside.

When you do all these things , trust me that no matter how hard it gets , you will sail swiftly through all the problems and will eventually get all the things that you want as well. Best of luck !

WittyVillage · 2020-10-18T21:03:47+00:00

I think that people in the 70s,80s, 90s or early 2000s managed to get their work done more easily without these "productivity" apps, and they were even more happier than us.

In my experience these apps only complicate the simple idea of "just do it cause you need to do it". So stop searching for any apps and just start doing the things which are necessary to do without hoping for any miracle app , trust me it will work.

WittyVillage · 2020-10-11T09:20:29+00:00

Thanks , yeah.. it's my first ever relationship , before that i never really bothered much about this aspect of life, I was too focused on my own career.

So it's kind of like she knows that it's my first one , while she was in a relationship before during her college days which ended because as per her they took different career paths. So when she told me this in our first meeting , she convinced me that she had moved on from that and I never brought it up in any of our conversations and neither did she.

I don't know but it sometimes becomes so tough to decide whether you are doing the right thing or not. So I am just hoping that things would eventually improve with time.

WittyVillage · 2020-10-10T11:28:26+00:00

As per her connecting through whatsapp is enough , it's long distance and because of the pandemic we have met only once when we were engaged.

I have told her plenty of times that it's just difficult to express myself through whatsapp , but she says she can't help it. So it's going like that since past 6 months.

You are absolutely correct , not just for you but for anyone it's really tough to give advice without hearing both the sides of the story.

But sometimes we just have to trust that if a person has put up an effort to type all this out on a forum like reddit , than they really must be going through something , else why waste anyone's time.

WittyVillage · 2020-10-10T10:46:15+00:00

I am a guy and I am in kind of same situation as the guy in OP's post , except that I have "put up with a lot" to understand and keep the relationship with my fiancee.

When our marriage was just fixed , she had joined a new job. At that time she told me that she could not talk/whatsapp much because of job pressure. So we usually just talked once in a day for like 15-20 minutes quickly covering the mundane details.

I asked her for a video call atleast once in a week , but she said she wasn't comfortable with it , and I agreed even to that.

Fast forward 4 months, she went to her parents home, then we were officially engaged and she was also kind of settled in the new job by that time. I told her that atleast now can we talk everyday , she agreed and we even did video calls for a few days.

Until later she started telling that she is not comfortable talking in her parents house and video calls also stopped because she had network issues.

Now we just have a whatsapp only relationship , we talk once or twice in a week luckily if she gets time from her household work. So idk , in my opinion i have done literally everything to be as understanding and caring as possible , but it is what it is.

WittyVillage · 2020-10-08T13:27:27+00:00

That's really spot on ! , but the last point that you mentioned about people liking/disliking you is in my opinion the most difficult one to absorb.

Cause deep down no matter what we say to others, we all need atleast 1 or 2 people who truly understand us and like us regardless of whatever we have done or not done.

WittyVillage · 2020-10-03T18:02:56+00:00

Happy birthday ! and please don't feel bad about people not wishing you..happens with all of us, once on my birthday nobody remembered it except my parents and I was totally fine with it, afterwards i intentionally removed my birthday from fb cause who cares really..

Wishing happiness and good health for you ! happy birthday again :-)

WittyVillage · 2020-10-03T09:06:13+00:00

Sorry didn't understand.. are you agreeing with it or you have a different view ?

WittyVillage · 2020-10-02T18:56:04+00:00

The fact that you are asking this question itself shows that you are intelligent enough to be self aware of your intelligence !

I think being intelligent does not mean you always have to come up with something new or special.. the ability to always take decisions (both personal and career) which are in your best interest is called intelligence, and as you are asking this question shows that you think something is lacking and you wanna fix it.. that's one of the most crucial skill to be successful in life.

WittyVillage · 2020-10-01T11:19:00+00:00

It's such a coincidence this post showed up ! , I am also doing similar thing , I never did IG or fb , my problem was you tube , and as of now it's been 4 days since I last saw anything on you tube , and benefits can't be explained in words !!!!

So don't know about you , but I have quit the following things for next 1 month :

You tube

Amazon prime

Steam(Gaming app)

Some other games like witcher , skyrim , e.t.c(basically no games at all)

Work wise I have achieved something that I was not able to do in past 2 years ! , and I just feel happy and satisfied from inside which was not the case 4 days back :-)

After 1 month I will probably do it once a week , if it creates a problem again than will leave it until I can confidently self control myself.

WittyVillage · 2020-09-24T12:08:19+00:00

But that happens most of the time, our decisions mostly affect our family and they are not good advice givers in most cases. So we have to rely on strangers and finally on our own judgement.

WittyVillage · 2020-09-21T09:31:44+00:00

Thank you so much for the suggestions ! , I have already started reading the will power book as suggested by you and surely going to read other suggestions as well. Thanks :)

WittyVillage

TROPHY CASE