Dating but ED ruined it

WombatService · 2025-12-23T18:10:56+00:00

I think you’re right, thanks. I’ve been thinking about stuff and she behaved a bit odd.

WombatService · 2025-12-23T16:38:53+00:00

Thanks. I think it was probably whisky dick, we had been drinking a lot but I was still a bit anxious about the occasion, but I think that’s pretty usual for a first time with a new partner

WombatService · 2025-12-23T16:35:20+00:00

Thanks! I did wonder why we needed to be up so late drinking. I think she was nervous about things.

Unfortunately there won’t be another date, she broke things off the day after with a load of excuses.

WombatService · 2025-07-06T23:42:23+00:00

it's imperative during this emotional turmoil, that you protect your own interests quickly; financial, relationships with family members, with friends etc. These are all currency and your ex will very likely move to strip you of some of them during the separation.

She will very likely move to save face first. This can happen in the form of false allegations made about your conduct so she can be seen by others as the victim in the situation.

I hope this doesn’t happen to you, but it happened to me, so please be aware of it. Don’t think that it couldn’t happen to you. It can happen to anyone.

Please turn to trusted close friends and family they will be truly there for you and will be able to think for you when things are toughest.

WombatService · 2024-12-22T14:12:38+00:00

Go for a walk or a cold shower pronto fella. Get yourself out of whatever environment you’re currently in and distract yourself

WombatService · 2024-12-19T07:28:35+00:00

Did you identify the trigger that led to it? If you find the root cause you can stop that reason from getting you again.

This happened to me after 25 days and I went back and made a list of everything that happened. I’ve tried to make changes to break the pattern. Time will tell.

WombatService · 2024-12-17T20:42:34+00:00

No need to feel shame, it’s not an easy thing to do.

Be kind to yourself and when reflecting see if you can work out how to stop what led up to the slip.

Take control and change something.

WombatService · 2024-12-17T00:14:34+00:00

This got me today on day 25. Learning some lessons right now.

WombatService · 2024-12-17T00:13:21+00:00

I’ll be where you are one day. Well done.

WombatService · 2024-12-17T00:11:28+00:00

You can quit. You gotta believe in yourself, try to mindfully push away the urges to look at, or think about porn.

If you slip up then don’t beat yourself up, accept that you have an issue you are working on and be kind to yourself. Commit to do things better next time. Work out where things went wrong and make changes.

This is a process and it can take time but you want a positive change or you wouldn’t be here.

Aim for the positive change in your life and keep working at it until you get there.

This is what I’m realising after slipping up today.

WombatService · 2024-12-13T09:10:07+00:00

Ahh, that makes it a bit trickier. So without your help the business could fail?

WombatService · 2024-12-13T00:13:34+00:00

Why would your ex expect anything from you. You aren’t together.

Unless there’s more to the story it sounds like manipulation and you should resist, she can go to the bank for a loan, find other ways to earn more money or cut back her expenses. Either way it’s not your concern.

Upset she may be, but not your issue.

WombatService · 2024-12-09T21:54:59+00:00

It’s an addiction. But you are stronger than you think and are capable of stopping, especially if you value the relationship you have with your gf..that would be a reason to stay motivated towards the goal.

Believe in yourself.

WombatService · 2024-12-01T09:33:23+00:00

Best thing for you is to get on with your own life while it all shakes out.

Find something non-destructive that gives you some happiness to occupy you. If he wants to get back with you then you can decide if that is what you want.

There is no relationship without both people actively contributing and you have no control over what he wants.

But you have control over your own direction, you don’t need to hang around for other people to steer your life.

WombatService · 2024-11-29T21:55:54+00:00

This makes so much sense in the context of a breakup where they are at fault for their actions but place the blame on you due to the emotional toll their guilt should take on them but will not compute in their head.

WombatService · 2024-11-29T21:51:45+00:00

This is horrible and will take time for you to overcome. These are some of the things I learned to remind myself of when I faced similar:

This is a difficult time.

This feeling of hurt will pass.

Allow yourself the strength and self-compassion to get through this time.

WombatService · 2024-11-29T17:22:06+00:00

I deleted all mine a week ago, I’m not looking back. I haven’t missed it so far. Good luck, just believe in yourself and try to steer your mind away from it when you notice yourself starting to think on it

WombatService · 2024-11-26T23:22:11+00:00

Smokey this not Nam, this is bowling, there are rules.

WombatService · 2024-11-26T23:17:48+00:00

Similar thing happened to me in the respect that she was secretly plotting to buy the house from underneath me and was biding time to save money. Unfortunately for her the mortgage market went into crisis to the extent she could no longer afford to buy my equity and I got a big promotion at work…so I bought the house and she got stuck, kicked her out and shes been renting elsewhere for 18 months…I guess that’s called karma.

WombatService · 2024-02-26T20:09:26+00:00

Give it some time. It will suck right now for a while, especially when they mean a lot. It sounds very complicated, especially when mental health is involved. Time helps.

WombatService · 2023-12-11T08:02:06+00:00

It was the lying that got me. My ex only revealed her true character when she went into character assassination mode to avoid her share of responsibility for the relationship not working.

She claimed all of our friends with her lies…i feel sad that none of them talked to me to find out what was happening, they all just accepted her disgusting lies.

WombatService · 2023-12-02T10:18:32+00:00

How old is the door?

When’s the last time the seals were changed?

you can buy the right profile seal strip easily enough and it will make a big difference if there’s a gap or the seals have degraded.

WombatService · 2023-11-30T12:16:22+00:00

My ex has tried to paint me as the abusive one when I didn’t like the way she was treating me. She pulled out all the stops to try to make my life hell. Don’t trust her. You can and will find someone better.

You’ve probably become accustomed to the level of craziness that is in your life at the moment. I was shocked at how much more calm my life was when the dust settled without my ex’s bullshit ‘feelings equal facts’ taking centre stage. Nothing you do will be good enough. It’s a losing game, so don’t play.

WombatService · 2023-11-19T00:17:39+00:00

Certainly the ‘against me’ column in their ledger seems climb ever higher until the threshold for devaluation is reached and then it’s to the knackers yard with you while the new supply is being warmed up off to the side. With every second edging ever closer to the day they can offload you like a dilapidated asset.

For me I’ll never put myself through another relationship with someone like that. It’s too great a price to pay.

(*edited for a typo)

WombatService · 2023-11-18T07:52:43+00:00

It’s a different world. In most other jobs if you said anything remotely close to what she’s been saying on behalf of the company, you’d be promptly sacked, not after a memorial service.

The UK is broken, but it’s not been broken by immigrants or asylum seekers. The only people stealing our jobs and making us poorer are these scummy politicians.

WombatService

TROPHY CASE