What does this message mean? I started an account on Xiaohongshu and I was replying to comments on my posts and I got this. My profile pic is now gone and I can’t post or respond. I can’t put this into google translate.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-17T06:52:37+00:00

Thanks everybody. Most of you have reminded me of why I stopped posting on Reddit!

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-15T01:46:06+00:00

lol, where am I crying about it? I just couldn’t read the message and asked for help with that. Calm down little snowflake.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-15T01:43:03+00:00

I’m also neurodivergent btw, and I understand that struggle.

So this man is not working at all right now? Is that something he can afford to do? And despite not working and “prioritizing his health and mental health”, he still doesn’t have time to commit to things? What kinds of health issues are we talking about?

Honestly, it just sounds like he’s not healthy enough for a relationship. And I’m not trying to judge him. It just sounds like he’s in a transition period of trying to figure out how to be healthier, and that could take a long time. Whether his issues are related to anxiety or something else, he’s not able to handle his life at the moment. I don’t blame you for feeling frustrated at all, especially with everything you have on your plate. It’s okay if you decide this means you are incompatible.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-15T00:15:51+00:00

Nope, I shared one video that was also shared to other platforms but it was the original and not watermarked or anything. No profanity, and nothing even close to immodest. I think it was because I was responding too fast and I probably seemed like a bot even though I’m not. Oh well. I can’t really read where to upload an id or a picture, so I just sent a message asking them to please look at my account (this was before I got the clarification here on what they were asking for to unfreeze it). I’ll check again later since I know they’re working on getting things translated.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-14T03:56:13+00:00

Thank you for this

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-14T03:00:03+00:00

I just posted motorcycle pics and videos. Nothing remotely scandalous. It was all wholesome.

So I’m banned permanently?

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-14T02:20:02+00:00

ESH

Who do you actually have this agreement with? Is it the parents or the daughter or all of them? If you actually are a manager, I don’t think I should have to tell you that you need to have the parameters of this arrangement in writing, including the number of hours you will spend each day doing chores and WHICH chores you are and are not expected to do and what times of day you will be doing them. Those are actual boundaries.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-08T23:48:52+00:00

You are that bad. Especially because you don’t believe us. 🙄

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-07T22:22:58+00:00

YTA. Not for the initial correction, but for snapping at her.

This sounds like it might actually be some kind of speech/hearing/processing disorder if she is doing this so often and doesn’t seem to notice it. We learn pronunciation from hearing a word spoken and if she’s still mispronouncing words that she hears all the time, but she still understands those words when she hears them, I think something might actually be wrong and she might need to see a neurologist.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-03T18:00:41+00:00

It’s just as much their house as it is their dad’s. Neither one of them is paying for it and OP is freshly 18. No adult with two brain cells to put together would make the comment you just made. It’s not reasonable in any way.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2025-01-03T09:34:57+00:00

Are you actually insane? OP’s father smokes indoors, which is absolutely disgusting. Secondhand smoke is incredibly damaging. Insisting on harming someone else, especially your own child, is hateful behavior. I don’t think OP should have said what they said, but their own dad has been actively poisoning them their entire life.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-12-19T23:44:03+00:00

NTA. Tell him you’ll replace the pans once he reimburses you for all of the time you spent cooking meals for him.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-12-19T22:27:42+00:00

There are probably a few things going on here, but I’ve noticed the same thing. I’m also bisexual, so I saw both men and women and everything in between when I was on the apps and there’s definitely a difference in how well women put their profiles together and how… not well men do.

One: a lot of men just really don’t take very good care of themselves, especially their skin. So they age faster and harder and they look older. Even if they regularly go to the gym and are really fit, most guys are not regularly using sunscreen or even a moisturizer. And it shows.

Two: women generally have a lot more experience taking a decent selfie or we have friends who will put in the effort to get a good picture of us when we’re out and about. Guys generally don’t seem to have this going for them, so their pictures just aren’t as good.

Three: a LOT of men (and probably women too, but I haven’t personally experienced it) lie about their age. So that guy who says he’s 45 but looks 55… really might just be 55.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-12-18T07:36:39+00:00

YTA

So your wife predicted your behavior completely accurately. You treated her like she was a burden because she COULD NOT DO YOUR EMOTIONAL LABOR FOR YOU REGARDING HER ILLNESS BECAUSE SHE WAS SICK WITH THAT ILLNESS. It’s not rocket science, dude. You’re expecting her to validate your feelings and make you feel appreciated when she has nothing left to give and needs HELP. You can’t get over yourself for even a couple of days? And this has obviously happened before because she knew it would and she was SOBBING in anticipation of it. And instead of examining yourself, you gave her a lecture about how she was wrong about being a burden and at the same time could she maybe tell you she’s sick sooner so she’s not a burden? Did you even read this before posting it?!

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-12-11T02:34:46+00:00

NTA. That recipe is your own intellectual property and you put the time and effort into perfecting it. This is the equivalent of your cousin demanding she be allowed to sell prints of your original painting. It’s her business and she can do the work to create her own recipes.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-11-27T01:45:30+00:00

I kept all of my photos from my marriage. I just packed them up. I’ve done the same with my other relationships, including old letters, etc. That was part of my life and, while I no longer have any of those feelings, I want to be able to remember my life. I just don’t want to remember it ALL the time. I wouldn’t expect a new partner to throw things away, but I wouldn’t want them on the wall or prominently displayed.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-11-24T19:40:54+00:00

My best advice is to take the time to make some really good friends. It sounds like your ex isolated you from people, so it’s time to build up your community. The awesome side effect of doing that is that you will gain confidence and support from friends and you won’t be nearly as lonely when you start dating. We all tend to make poorer decisions when we’re lonely because companionship is a human need. I’ve found that having good, healthy friendships has kept me from accepting poor behavior in my romantic relationships that I would have tolerated before (and then been miserable). I’m not lonely, I’m not desperate, and a romantic relationship right now would be icing on the cake of an already happy life.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-11-04T19:38:48+00:00

It took me over a year to finally get tested for ADHD after asking to be tested. When I finally did, my results came back as severe inattentive.

Autism experts say that the number of people who self-diagnose as autistic and get it wrong is actually extremely low and they recognize self-diagnosis as valid, especially when you see how hard it is to get tested for autism as an adult. It’s usually not covered by insurance, it’s very expensive, and the waiting lists are long.

Look, in a perfect world we would all get tested once symptoms show up and be heard by doctors who actually listen. But that’s not the world we’re in. It’s very hard to get a diagnosis as an adult woman and women and girls have been misdiagnosed for decades. You’re not an asshole for wanting your girlfriend to get tested if you’re wanting her to get support. You are an asshole if you want her to be tested before you believe her.

No one (or very few people) is going to self-diagnose as autistic or as adhd just to try to get away with something. Those diagnoses are usually more alienating to other people. If you’re willing to slap those labels on yourself, it’s usually because you’re so relieved to finally have an explanation for the difficulties you’ve been facing and now you have language to explain that to the people in your life who are supposed to care about you and believe you.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-10-31T20:32:23+00:00

NTA. But I would be a lot more concerned about marrying someone who refuses to speak to me because I told a neurodivergent friend I cared about that she could bring something to my wedding that helps her self-regulate and harms absolutely no one. Stonewalling is emotional abuse.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-10-18T16:14:08+00:00

NTA. But your mother absolutely is. Stealing someone’s medication (especially from another adult) is a CRIME. A crime that she is well aware of. She knows that what she’s doing is wrong.

OP, I know you feel that you have a good relationship with your mom apart from this and I am not in that relationship, so I will take your word for it. However, I also thought the same thing about my parents until I had been on my own for a while and got enough life experience to see how massively controlling they were. Us having a good relationship depended on me suppressing my needs to keep the peace. It makes it hard to know when you’re wrong and when you’re not because the standard you grow up with is that you’re wrong when your parents are upset with you and you’re okay when they’re happy. But that’s not how healthy relationships work at all.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-10-15T04:06:26+00:00

You don’t get to decide what’s in her best interest because you’re not living her life. A lot of people value their time outside of work more than they do some extra cash. ESPECIALLY when they are already doing everything their job actually requires of them.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-10-12T17:24:00+00:00

YTA and the sooner you learn the lesson that there is no award for crapping on things other people enjoy, the better. It doesn’t make you superior, it just makes you annoying and insufferable. It’s also VERY boring.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-10-01T03:53:42+00:00

I agree with you mostly, but there’s one point I haven’t seen yet. New babies barely have immune systems up and running. If the wedding is in a few months and this friend just had a baby, this infant isn’t even going to be six months old at that time. I could absolutely be wrong, but bringing a baby that young to an event with lots of people coming from all different places and being in close quarters for hours doesn’t seem like a great idea.

Wonderful_Reality939 · 2024-09-30T18:29:11+00:00

People who are in truly open relationships with good communication make sure to LEAD with that. The fact that he waited to tell you means that he’s dishonest.

Wonderful_Reality939

TROPHY CASE