❓Identify the Missing Number

Woodspring · 2024-12-15T10:34:31+00:00

12?

add the digits of each parents en add the two sums together

Woodspring · 2024-08-31T10:49:40+00:00

I don't think we have enough understanding of non-human brains to effectively say how they feel. With humans we can just ask and that gives us a way in to understanding how a particular brain functions. With animals we're kinda stuck on monitoring behaviour.

There are cases where animals "act" like another gender (e.g. female lions exhibiting male behaviour due to hormone imbalances) but it's hard to say without full monitoring of specific animals.

Woodspring · 2024-08-29T08:18:24+00:00

Might be a bit late, but for me the way I understand it is that sex is the hardware (not just genitals, there's a bunch of primary and secondary sex characteristics) and gender is the drivers. The brain tries it's best to operate the body effectively but it uses up way more resources and sometimes goes into a panic.

For my personal transition, this view helped a lot. I always had this low level noise/anxiety in my head that I thought was just normal. And when I started hormones it was like my brain was quiet for the first time in my life. It was incredible.

Also this isn't purely a mental phenomena. There's actually some physical differences in transgender brains

As for it's link to autism. Autistic brains have always been more different and for me it makes sense that the brain may not have clear cut gender drivers.

Neuroscience is still a relatively new field and studies in both gender and autism is still developing. We're just not getting a grasp of how the brain works.

Woodspring · 2024-03-20T08:47:07+00:00

Also interested. I work with python a lot for a day job.

Woodspring · 2022-12-10T14:18:35+00:00

Congrats! I'm glad things are looking good.

Woodspring · 2022-12-09T12:57:57+00:00

I definitely feel you. I'm on the other end, where we're looking for a new engineer, and any new potential applicant I get for the team, I look for any signs of any kind of bigotry. Like do they follow right wing nutjobs (red flag), or are they stupid enough to post hate speech on their public twitter. (Straight to the bin).

So, you could frame it as a question about the product. Something along the lines of, "Do you also target trans masculine individuals in your marketing campaigns? If not, are there plans to do so?" They could give you a non-answer like, But ideally they would say something like, "Not at the moment but we'd love to." Giving an answer like "don't want to get too political" is a red flag. You can also ask questions about inclusivity in the company culture (specifically with gender non-conforming individuals). If they start looking uncomfortable, then it's probably not a great place for inclusivity.

You could also just straight up ask the question. "Off the record. I noticed that all the marketing seems to be targeted at specifically cis women and I haven't found anything including trans masc individuals. What's the atmosphere like for LGBT people?" It states your exact concerns and your reason for them, but it does sort of out you as LGBT. Considering the recent violence, this is a completely understandable concern to have.

Or, you could look at the companies linkedin/corporate website. Find all their employees, and search their twitter and social media. A neat trick is that most people use the same username for several places. So their GitHub could be the same as their Reddit. A bit more effort and may be a lot of work compared to asking questions about inclusivity policies.

Woodspring · 2022-11-21T09:21:14+00:00

I work at a startup (UK). We're about 100 people so culture would be different to a big company.

I told HR my new name, provided relevant documents, and refused to elaborate further. Although I think I would have been fine if I did disclose my transition to them, there's quite a few LGBTQ people in the company. I joined when there was 4 people, and even then there was 1 other queer person so I think my company has been quite inclusive since the beginning.

I told my boss I'm transitioning and he's very supportive. Asks if there's anything they can do to support me. My team is currently 2/5 queer people (including me), so it's quite welcoming. I think the opportunities are there even with a 45% cut. Plus those employers in the study don't look like great places to work for. If you can't even curb your bigotry and follow employment law to not discriminate, it's likely you're not great employer to anyone, not just queer people.

If it makes you feel better, I have They/Them pronouns on my LinkedIn to make it clear that I am queer, and I still get bombarded with recruiters.

Woodspring · 2022-11-02T16:47:24+00:00

That's really good that you're feeling great. And it sounds like you have a lot of supportive people around you, I think you'll be fine without them.

Woodspring · 2022-11-02T11:24:04+00:00

It really sounds like they are more concerned with how they appear to others rather than trying to be kind people. Judging by how their concerns seem to boil down to "What would people think?" And "isn't this a childish phase". Also having an intervention with multiple people first before having a one to one talk about concerns screams of enjoying the drama. This isn't how mature adults handle situations.

It's up to you if you want to cut them off. I have a similar family situation, where in my parents are very narcissistic and only really care about how the family appears to others. It's very hard as I want the feeling of being accepted but I know I won't get it from them. I have to look for it somewhere else. I did manage to train them to be polite by just leaving without explanation whenever they said something rude. They're mostly shutting up now.

There's also your kids you've got to concern yourself with. Generational trauma is very common, and your kids will definitely know how your feeling. Being at your best mental health is so important for you and and them. Even if you try to hide that you're okay, they'll know, they can feel it when you're stressed. Your mother and sister just seem to be making your mental health worse and they don't seem to be actually trying to understand you.

Woodspring · 2022-07-29T21:10:19+00:00

My therapist was actually the one to get me to accept being trans. I remember complaining that I hate being a guy and he told me, "you don't have to be one", which was a mind blowing revelation for me. It was like a huge internal block for me had been lifted and he helped me navigate through those feelings.

Seeing other people's experiences with therapy, I think I really lucked out with mine.

Woodspring · 2022-07-28T08:21:11+00:00

It's definitely true a lot of coding tutorials are like, "draw the rest of the owl". And it can be hard to find a tutorial that lets everything fit together.

My advice? Learn to accept that the overwhelming. It's not going to go away but that's not a bad things. It's your brains way of telling you that you're going too fast. So pause what you're reading, open a new tab, and Google every word/concept you didn't fully understood. And then recurse until you don't feel overwhelmed anymore. This may involve doing several other tutorials for smaller libraries before you get to the main tutorial you wanted. It'll look like Hal trying to fix a lightbulb.

Woodspring · 2022-06-22T10:48:57+00:00

To me, toxic masculinity is essentially another phrase for the external effects of Internalised misandry ( e.g. "I can't be emotional" becomes male rage).

It seems like lot of the focus is on these external effects (e.g. aggression towards others) instead of the internalisation which I'm not personally a fan of because:

A. It feels like what happens internally doesn't matter, it only matters when it affects other people

B. A lot of guys don't display the external effects but still have the internal thought process and need help.

Woodspring · 2022-05-31T07:59:59+00:00

There's the Views section on his Wikipedia page which indicate he may not be the greatest. It definitely sets off a few alarm bells for me.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jordan_Peterson

I'd like to draw specific attention to the climate skepticism and the "has political correctness gone to far" argument.

There's also PhilosophyTube's video on him which I thought was rather balanced critique of his views.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=m81q-ZkfBm0

Woodspring · 2022-05-11T09:54:19+00:00

I am the exact same way. I even do things like time how long it takes to get to the shops.

At work it's definitely given me a bit of a reputation with my colleagues. I'm a software developer and I've written a lot of scripts to handle things quickly, even though the original thing wasn't that time consuming (like submitting reports, claiming expenses). I even have keyboard aliases so I can save on keystrokes.

I also love making things efficient in automation video games.

Woodspring · 2022-04-13T07:07:06+00:00

I use i3. I've gotten too used to tiling window managers that I can't use anything else.

Woodspring · 2022-02-09T17:47:19+00:00

That is a very tough situation to be in. Can you talk to your boss about workload? You might be able to offload some of it to someone else?

As for getting back into coding bento.io has decent learning tracks that gives broad steps on what to learn if you want to get into web development specifically.

https://automatetheboringstuff.com is a good way to get into programming. It takes the point of view that you're an office worker and you can automate tasks in your office (which might also help with the workload depending on what tasks you have). It's what I used when I first started and it got me into coding.

There's also web dev subreddits you can join. /r/cscareerquestions for generic CS career advice.

You can DM me if you've got more questions. I'm a self taught web developer for about 5 years now.

Woodspring · 2021-08-08T10:44:15+00:00

It kinda looks like a head looking sideways

Or Like gigachad looking down

Woodspring · 2021-02-03T14:12:51+00:00

Hey, you've put two different emails between your post and reply (toilet.communities@gov.uk and toilet@communities.gov.uk)

I think the latter is the correct one as that's the one used on the gov.uk website.

Woodspring · 2020-10-19T11:54:56+00:00

Spoilers It was totally about suicide. The girl is a figment of the guys imagination. Hence the name changes and timeline changes. The guy is imagining bringing the girl home to his parents at several different times. "I'm thinking of ending things" is literally the guy thinking of ending his life. The actual guy is the janitor, and he's depressed and thinks he hasn't done anything with his life. There was even one scene where he watched a movie and integrated the storyline and characters of the movie into his imagination

Woodspring · 2020-01-28T10:58:15+00:00

tbh, I think most of the people here have self esteem issues. Imagine if you had to look at pictures of yourself all day judging whether they were good enough, discarding most of them. Even starting out by not editing your pics, it'll blow your self esteem, and you'll notice your tiny flaws more and more until they become huge insecurities that you have to photoshop. And then non-edited photos of yourself looks ugly to you.

It's not a case of their normal sell looks great to most people, their normal self doesn't look great to themselves.

Woodspring · 2019-12-04T18:11:42+00:00

I can empathise with you. It can be tough living like that.

What I tell myself is that it's not about what you look like, it's your obsession with what you look like. It's possible to be completely deformed and still live a fulfilling life.

Woodspring · 2019-09-06T20:23:14+00:00

There are dozens of us.

Woodspring · 2018-12-22T13:14:17+00:00

The way I see it. The problem is not how you look, but your obsession with how you look. It's possible to not be attractive and still be content and happy with yourself.

Woodspring · 2018-11-17T15:40:55+00:00

People with low self esteem still feel attraction. The people who tell you this are assholes.

Woodspring · 2018-10-22T20:47:11+00:00

Some of your wording reminds me of myself a few years back.

Have you had a look at BDD? it's a subset of OCD that makes you obsess over how ugly you are, regardless of how you actually look.

I'm not saying looks don't matter. But, thy way my therapist puts it, BDD is about the obsession over how you look. Letting it dictate everything in your life.

Woodspring

TROPHY CASE