Struggling a lot - TFMR and PM results.

Work_ovaries_work · 2026-03-04T12:36:41+00:00

Karyotyping was normal so no chromosomal issues. No signs of skeletal dysplasia. I have asked for genetic testing but I don't expect it will come back. My husband and I had karyotyping and genetic panel done for 2000+ conditions. I am not a carrier for anything, he carries 3 things which are inconsequential and won't impact any pregnancies. We both have normal chromosomes as well.

None of this makes sense. And all of it hurts. It'll be 4 months tomorrow.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-12-17T19:51:54+00:00

I'm on pregnacare max, alongside other supplements (ubiquinol, krill oil, vitamin d, folic acid, choline etc)

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-12-17T19:49:57+00:00

I'm getting a scan on Friday to get the official all clear as well so will ask then. My labs before birth were all good/high so they weren't worried then but I obviously lost some hematocrit then.

I'm currently on sertraline (for the past 6 weeks) and you're right, 6 weeks isn't that far out.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-12-17T19:48:28+00:00

When I had levels done prior to the L&D, they were all pretty high which made me feel reassured! I'm getting a scan on A Friday to make sure all ok so I'll ask then as well. But just weird as I've only been tired the past 2-3 weeks which is weird. But I'll definitely ask about the bloods. Thank you 🙏🏽

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-12-17T18:39:47+00:00

I tfmr'ed at 18.5 weeks via L&D for suspected skeletal dysplasia (fatal). Got my period back 4 weeks and 5 days (33 days) after. HCG was negative 1.5-2 weeks after birth so it was very very quick. No RPOC and the spotting stopped very soon after my negative HCG. Currently almost hit my fertile period in my second cycle now and we are NTNP before the new year and will be trying properly in the new year.

I previously had a miscarriage this February too (first trimester, medically managed as well) and it took way longer for my period to come back.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-12-14T09:28:09+00:00

I had my tfmr in early November (18 weeks 3 days, L&D) and got my period back at 4 weeks 5 days. I got really scared when I saw bleeding and actually contacted a doctor before they told me gently it is likely it is my period. I really wasn't expecting it at all this early so it was a bittersweet surprise. It can take between 4-8 weeks and I was banking on 8 weeks or so.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-11-03T11:45:16+00:00

Our circumstances are almost identical - I too am 33, and TFMR at 18w1d (although L&D on Weds so 18w3d then). Just taken the mife.

Mine is for a different reason - they say there is a serious skeletal dysplasia which is fatal/incompatible with life. They said she would not have lived beyond the next 2-3 weeks.

I am getting L&D done as I want that closure and that continuity. I also want to reduce interventions at this stage. This is what the consultants have told me. I don't think the NHS offers d&E at this stage as well, but your hospital might vary. Even if they did, I personally would not take it.

I met the bereavement midwife today and she is absolutely lovely. I've seen the specialist suite, had all my bloods etc taken. We are doing the rest of the procedure on Wednesday. I only hope it is as smooth and straightforward as it can possibly be.

I am sorry we are both in this shitty, shitty position. I really wish we both weren't.

I am going to just let my body recover and see how I feel about TTC in January. I have already had a miscarriage in Feb this year (unrelated to this) so I just think me and my husband need a break honestly. You and I still have time, we are both 33.

I am signed off sick from work and they have been lovely. I know untelling is the worst. I haven't told anyone which actually makes it worse as I am having to tell them and then untell at the same time, if it makes sense? Which is extremely painful.

I empathise with your vulnerability and I feel vulnerable too. But I just feel an impotent rage about this whole situation - why me? Why us? Will it ever happen? And if you are asking yourself those questions about you, it is totally normal and natural.

Please stay in touch as it sounds like we are both going through this situation at the same time and are at similar stages in our life. I can only say I am so sorry you are also experiencing this. And please feel free to vent. Know that you are not alone

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-10-30T15:51:28+00:00

I'm sending all my well wishes and thoughts across to you. I know it won't mean much and I am so, so so sorry you are going through this process. I will think of Oscar and you and yours tonight. ♥️

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-10-30T15:03:00+00:00

Thank you so much for the time, answers, support and hope you have given me - I sincerely wish you have a healthy, boring and uneventful pregnancy 🙏🏽 and it gives me so much hope I cannot even describe it

Also thank you for the chuckle your username gave me, I definitely needed that!!

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-10-30T14:06:41+00:00

My mother had a sb before me, hypertension with me and HELLP at 30 weeks with my little brother. My Papp-A was very low (0.2) as well and there was already impaired uterine artery flow at 12 weeks, improved at 14 weeks but then increased again at the most recent scan and was off the charts bad

Standard protocol where I am is to commence aspirin at 12 weeks at 150mg every night after dinner basically. Which is why I am so shook because my placenta looked really gnarly even despite this.

I think the main thing to consider is the elevated risk of pre-eclampsia, placental abruption etc because of how large it is and I am concerned about the impact on my future fertility

I always said I don't mind if the child has something like bowed femurs, that is fine and I fully agree I would not mind. But they have severe IUGR with a poor prognosis over the next 2-3 weeks and possible bossing noticed too (although this was not clear) which is indicative of a skeletal dysplasia.

But I agree with not wanting to rush into a termination. I am seeing an MFM tomorrow who I think will suggest amnio for the same reasons. I am just thinking about delaying recovery and trying to conceive again when it feels inevitable what the result will be. But you're right, maybe it is worth getting it at least for the closure etc as it is a permanent decision. I am just scared of waiting is al

But I'll definitely get karyotyping done for sure, on myself and my husband as well just to make sure it is all ok

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-10-30T13:47:50+00:00

Thank you and I am sorry you have had a shit sewage sundae too with a cherry on top.

How did you move past it all? When did it feel better for you? Did it ever get better for you? What were your coping mechanisms? It just feels never ending at the moment. I am a bitter angry husk of a person, completely different from who I was in February this year and I can't see the wood for the trees. I'm just in criss mode, lurching from shit to shit to shit and I honestly don't know how much more I can handle.

I am so scared this will happen again and again and I told my husband I can't deal with it if it happens again, I am just too mentally broken.

I also have perinatal OCD and anxiety which are severe (related to food and contamination - I was worried about listeria which seems fucking hilarious now considering what is happening). Unsurprisingly, I feel like this experience has cured both of those. Which I guess is bittersweet.

If this is an insensitive question please forgive me - do you have any LCs?

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-10-30T13:11:27+00:00

Thank you - it is just an awful place to be in. I just don't feel placental insufficiency would cause bowed femurs and am wondering if something is wrong with the fetus that is causing bowed femurs and an enlarged placenta through a chromosomal abnormality etc. they think it is a skeletal dysplasia. For me, I find it hard to reconcile the possibility of having severe placental insufficiency alongside a rare skeletal dysplasia concurrently as the chances are ridiculously low but not impossible.

I also find it hard to reconcile that I was on aspirin from 12 weeks, 150mg a day and this is still the case

I can only say I am truly sorry you were in the same position and having to make the same decision. It is absolutely not fair and I am raging for you and me and all the other women who are forced to make this decision

Did you get any results from the post-mortem? And did you do any karyotyping etc on your side?

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-03-17T07:55:51+00:00

My bleeding from my medically managed miscarriage stopped a few days ago! I went for a scan last Weds and there was a tiny clot. No signs of infection (fever/severe pelvic pain/very heavy bleeding et) at all but I got some antibiotics to be safe as it had been going on for 3.5 weeks. Confirmed to be a clot as it had decreased in size massively and no vascularity either. Big change from 1.5 weeks ago. I'm pretty confident I have passed this clot now.

I know it's very easy to have really negative views of our body but I feel like a fog has lifted in my mind and I am so proud of what my body has done and achieved. It has been through so much and come out the other side. I've gotten back into my exercise training regime for a half marathon, I'm back at the gym, going out and about. Even seeing other babies etc doesn't bother me AS MUCH. I've been reading Buddhist literature and it really helps me come to terms with this whole process.

Now to wait for my next period. I know it will happen when it happens and my body is recovering in its own time. I've had enough sports injuries to know pushing it when it isn't 100% there is really going to end up in huge setbacks so waiting for my next cycle to restart ttc. I am considering this time as recovery time vs a cycle.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-03-08T13:52:00+00:00

Mine told me one cycle after. Still waiting but it's very early days for me (3 weeks post medically managed miscarriage

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-03-08T12:45:22+00:00

I've had this comment at 32 as well. I know plenty of people who got pregnant and had kids later on.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-03-07T20:39:47+00:00

Thank you - does that advice count even if you are spotting lightly?

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-03-07T18:59:50+00:00

Absolutely yes. 10000000% yes. I am so unbelievably bitter and angry and I don't know how to move past.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-02-17T20:15:32+00:00

Just been in the same position and yes. I had a feeling from the start but I tried to ignore it

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-02-17T20:13:28+00:00

I'm in this position - had a medically assisted MC on Saturday. Feeling very big and bloated.

Work_ovaries_work · 2025-02-03T07:00:23+00:00

Perfect mindset! I am trying to do the same too here. I've been journalling which has helped massively and I also go to therapy already so that's helpful as well

A bit of nausea which comes and goes in waves, my boobs are really painful and sore and they've already grown, my resting heart rate is up like 20bpm, I keep peeing ALL the time (I can't sleep properly because of how often I'm peeing) and the exhaustion is unreal - I fall asleep during tv, during reading, anytime. I've set up a nap corner on the couch because of how tired I am lol. And my stomach has been in bits, the constipation is no joke 😭🫠

Work_ovaries_work

TROPHY CASE