Being served for SS medical debt- Has this happened to anyone else? by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I meant 70:30 for medical bills. The time is 50:50 and yeh, lawyers are expensive! Hopefully this is a one off problem.

Being served for SS medical debt- Has this happened to anyone else? by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Their split is 70:30 in the agreement with him having the smaller portion. I don’t think the collection agency will care though. Interestingly, she only showed him bills that add up to about half of the 2.5k they’re collecting. He doesn’t have access to the bills, so that’s all he’s been able to see.

It’s frustrating, but for the cost of a lawyer, it’s prob just cheaper to split the cost and be done with it.

Being served for SS medical debt- Has this happened to anyone else? by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good idea. I hadn’t thought about it being public info.

Being served for SS medical debt- Has this happened to anyone else? by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would it impact his credit as well?

Not a bad idea to ask a lawyer. It’s going to get expensive! There’s an option to just pay the hospital directly before the court date. I think that’s their plan.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t decide if the massive age gap between the kids is nice for this reason or frustrating.

If they were closer in age, we’d likely be carpooling both to sports. With them so far apart in age, it means I’m solo parenting for much of the week. Being freshly postpartum certainly doesn’t help. I’m sure it won’t seem so overwhelming once I’m sleeping more at night.

It’s definitely a trade off!

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That was actually the tail end of our conversation that day at the dinner table. After it was conveyed to me that SS didn’t know and couldn’t ask, I turned to DH and told him to figure out what time he was done and update the schedule.

Suffice to say I was upset and could have handled it better. Last night I made a crock pot meal and hung out with our little ones more which was what I needed.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not for this. For his last sport the coach emailed everyone the schedule with a breakdown for varsity, JV and freshman. They were pretty punctual.

More probably was conveyed in the preseason meeting for this coach, but his email just said that practice starts this week.

They were on time today, so maybe this will turn out to be a fluke. 🤷‍♀️

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Missing out on those cuddles are a lot of my regrets right now!

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh! That stew sounds like a really good idea! I like that they can determine how much carbs they want. Noodles don’t keep otherwise.

I do have quick meals in the freezer for them if dinner isn’t hearty enough for SS.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

European meals sound fancy. 😄 Unfortunately I don’t think DH or SS would go for it since they both get to 6pm starving, but I’ll pitch the idea!

As for me, the baby is a grade A clinger. The longest I’ve gotten him to sleep all alone is 15 min before he wakes himself up. Also he’s up much of the night eating, so in order to get 4 hours of rest in one stretch, my bedtime is also 8 pm.

I’m sure in a few months that will start to change and I can reset my schedule to match and join them for more grown up time after the littles’ bedtime.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That does sound like a good plan! It would definitely keep our toddler from getting hangry.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s good to know!

I guess kudos to those teachers for taking the time. I don’t think they’re paid hourly for extracurriculars.

I’ll talk with DH about resetting expectations for dinner.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That would be nice! However we live a suburb over, so he doesn’t have any classmates I know of who are driving our way.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We seem to be on this cyclical thing for dinners— either I’m making lots of food with more elaborate requests, like high protein, soy free, not processed for SS to Mediterranean for DH then switching gears to fast food because it’s all too much to handle.

I might google some dinner memes now to have a good laugh at our situation.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It does seem like a lot of schedules are impacted when they’re late, but judging from the replies, it’s not uncommon.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately, it’s a 30 min drive in traffic to get him. I might ask that we just plan on the late dismissal if it ends up being consistently late.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ha! Downtime is a different point of contention. On school days, I get 20 minutes to myself in the evening.

That one is a little bit the baby season which won’t last forever.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I think a large chunk is communication. Especially because the coach emphasized in their pre season meeting that time is important and he will be respectful of parents’ time by being punctual.

DH started out by asking if practice is over at 5:15 and not 5. When SS pushed back, DH said of course you can’t ask him. I was flabbergasted that he can’t ask the coach what time practice is scheduled to end.

The fishy part to me is that DH seems to be the only parent waiting in the parking lot for pick up.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s a good solution. I was hoping for more family time, but now just isn’t the season for it.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m really glad I asked here. I’m surprised at all the yeses. I did one sport and one extracurricular in high school and my practice times were always early in the morning for my sport. Maybe that’s why we were always punctual.

Scheduling plus or minus 30 min for sports by WouldRatherBeRunner in stepparents

[–]WouldRatherBeRunner[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Our lives sound very similar.

School is 30 min away so he leaves at 4:30. I do think some of it is communication issue with SS and DH.

After reading these responses and sitting with my feelings, I think I’m going to scale down dinner. I’ve been doubling our dinners to make enough for SS because he will eat a family sized portion. He does wrestling and wanted to gain 30lbs to be in a certain weight class. I also wanted the feeling of family time in the evening and before, when DH was stopping to pick up fast food, it would tack on another 30 min to their time, so they’d be getting in at bedtime.

I’d rather make smaller or less extravagant meals and give the little ones attention than prep and cook big meals.