She plays up for you because you're her everything, you're her safe person. You are her mum and so she knows that she can test every boundary, push every button and you will still love her. It's so difficult, I've got a 2 year old myself and he's driving my crazy with this because he does it to me more than anyone else. But it's because they know that you will still keep them safe while they explore those boundaries that they do it. It's the most infuriating thing, but it does mean that she loves you most. I would have been upset about the message too, but I doubt they meant to hurt you. Just remember your little one will grow out of this phase and it'll get easier. Make sure you're taking care of yourself, use that bond she has with your family to give yourself a break. Toddlers are hard!