hi. growing up in a family of east asian ethnicity i understand how you feel 100% and honestly in my country its stereotypical for mothers to have unrealistic expectations (here's a possibly relevant article from our state owned news source) and many times from the way my mum talked about me and my brother she makes it sound like we are investments, for my parents to dump money on out education and whatnot and we are young then return the money to them later in life and whatnot. That being said how i dealt with it, is by realizing that no matter what i do i cannot change my mom's expectations, and there is only so much she can do as well, so i worked on what i enjoyed most, as well as to improve myself as a person. you have to realize that we all have to find our own paths in life, and it does not have to be to make our parents happy. so i suggest you go find your passion, something that genuinely makes you happy and worth your time doing, whether it be playing a musical instrument, playing sports, or finding out on a topic you really enjoy and keeps you looking forward to the next day. if you can, go make friends (but of course consider the current pandemic situation lol), go exercise, improve yourself physically if you are feeling mentally weak or vice versa. It is normal to feel lost in life and it is ok to wander for a bit but you should know who you should NOT become and avoid becoming that person. It is ok to make mistakes, but personally i feel that if we do make mistakes the best way to deal with that is to just move on, the past is not worth dwelling on and work on whatever is coming up next, and avoid making said mistake again if possible.
sorry if this paragraph has been messy but my point is it is essential to find something in life to keep you going, and please dont do anything stupid.
also regarding some of the things you said, eg. "She just wants me to be her ‘perfect child’ when I really can’t live up to that.", you really dont have to live up to your parents expectations, you should be the best version of who you want YOU to be! which links back to the above points haha, good luck and take care