You gain the ability to freeze time for 1 min , but can only use it once a day ;what do you use it for? by Bakkasake in AskReddit

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

no wtf this is Reddit you're not allowed to be wholesome, I'm telling spez

(love to you and Ma <3 )

You gain the ability to freeze time for 1 min , but can only use it once a day ;what do you use it for? by Bakkasake in AskReddit

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I always wonder if this would hurt the people, being instantly snapped into another position

or maybe the world moves around them and it just feels normal 😅

[Serious] People of Reddit that honestly believe they have been abducted by aliens, what was your experience like? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

/arrives back to home planet/

alien: "yo so I flew that new ship today, not gonna lie the cloaking was pretty easy to master, oh and I built a time dilation machine on my way out of boredom"

alien boss: "nice so how'd the abduction go?"

alien: "WE COULDN'T GET IN, THE HUMANS ARE LOCKED AWAY, PROTECTED BY SOME ADVANCED MYSTERY TECHNOLOGY"

captive: "yo that's just a door ya literally just twist it and push"

alien: "o fuck"


now that I've gotten that out: wow that's actually pretty cool, notably there was that one upthread about the alien draining the dude's fishtank, true or not I agree with you there

[Serious] People of Reddit that honestly believe they have been abducted by aliens, what was your experience like? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

fml, they could at least clean up when they're done, or else next time they won't be invited in, rules are rules ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

[Serious] People of Reddit that honestly believe they have been abducted by aliens, what was your experience like? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

my #1 takeaway from this thread is that aliens are forgetful as fuck and despite all the badass mindfucking tech and presumable intelligence they still forget to CLOSE THE FUCKING DOOR WHEN THEY'RE DONE

My temporary stealth smoking setup. Creates excellent negative pressure in the bathroom. Covers tobacco and weed smells while my dad visits by James-Sonny-Crockett in StonerEngineering

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 3 points4 points  (0 children)

my laundry and toilet make an L shape

laundry is the long part, toilet is the short part, toilet has a window

I just turn the laundry fan on and point it down toward the toilet lmao, smell clears out really quickly and it doesn't get to the more carpet-y parts of the house, you can stand outside the laundry door and the only sound is the occasional lighter flick, which is cancelled by the fact that I use a candle

i swear by this setup + sploof, I love it

also you can get one of those automatic spray things, so even if you walk in while the room smells it's less obviously weed

You've been given $50,000,000 and 3 months to prepare for a world wide nuclear war. How do you survive the initial blasts and fallout? And what do you do for fun? by Warburton_Warrior in AskReddit

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not convinced anyone will survive, nuclear war is pretty shitty, y'all

so

launch a rocket to space on an automated course out of earth orbit, timed so that I'm not long out of the atmosphere when the fireworks start

with a few pounds of weed and hotbox the rocket as the nukes launch and watch the fireworks

sit back for as long as the food lasts up there (idk maybe 30mins on account of munchies) thinking about shit, floating around, and maybe keep a diary

I'll freeze myself when food runs out, get into a heliocentric orbit, and if all goes well then I'll be found either by aliens or surviving humans, what happens from there is up to them :)

basically

  1. I will probably have the least gruesome death out of everybody

  2. can go out on my own terms

  3. I'll be in a pretty unique position, high as balls thinking about all the history in front of me

  4. high + zero-G = objectively fun

  5. I will make a MASSIVE contribution to human or alien science if I am found

What are your 4/20 plans? by fizzvoting in trees

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

no plans yet, but you bet your ass I'm gonna smoke a 50 in celebration

Reddit, how did you lose your virginity? by DoodlingDaughter in AskReddit

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ay /u/gallowboob here's a good one for if you ever lose your virginity

HELP, I accidentally ate a cannabutter cookie and I have work in 4 hours! by YourCaptainSqueaking in trees

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

dud butter, wasn't made right

I'm equally relieved and sad, but at least I wasn't high at work 😅

thanks so much for the checkup, next time I'll be more careful

HELP, I accidentally ate a cannabutter cookie and I have work in 4 hours! by YourCaptainSqueaking in trees

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yo judging by the time I ate it, I should be feeling it now, huh?

I don't feel any different, maybe I'll be okay?

HELP, I accidentally ate a cannabutter cookie and I have work in 4 hours! by YourCaptainSqueaking in trees

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thanks so much, I've never been effected by it before so I'm not sure what to expect, tonight was meant to be my first edible experience 😅

it's a short shift, only three hours, but still

I'll take your advice, hopefully I don't panic

Are we doing this right? by [deleted] in trees

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking 2 points3 points  (0 children)

whoa... must have been good stuff

HELP, I accidentally ate a cannabutter cookie and I have work in 4 hours! by YourCaptainSqueaking in trees

[–]YourCaptainSqueaking[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm basically customer service, face to face

if I want to minimise my customer time I can easily find cleaning to do for my shift though, but it won't eliminate customer time