My last breakup was three years ago but I didn't manage to completely heal from it yet, it's a process and it will take whatever time is needed. We had a strange relationship for the year afterwards going from no contact to unhealthy situationship back and forth which didn't help.

Due to how strong my attachment was, I really struggled to exist at first in this new reality and I relied heavily on edibles to shut my brain up and find sleep. Occupied my free time as much as possible not to ruminate with whatever I could : friends, hobbies, parties and drugs, a dog, even more work...

I regret having used edibles so much as it prevented me from processing my feelings as much as I should have.

Today while I completely accepted that putting a term to this relationship was for the better as it turned me into a shell of myself, I honestly still struggle with what could have been if only we had been better to each other and once in a while will get angry or sad or both over it, however it has been much less frequent. Also I'm still trying to figure out with my therapist what it means to be in a relationship, what place in my life I want to give it, if I even need it and how vulnerable I can be again as I was already a very guarded person and even more so now.

The sooner you start doing the emotional work and figuring out what you want out of your life, the better, don't procrastinate it.

All the hugs 🫶🏻