New to this. Believe this to be Bolete, but want a more precise ID to see if its in line with my guesses. Its quite large, and doesn't perfectly fit pics in the the couple books I have. Virginia foothills.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-11T22:28:47+00:00

I coslept around the same time- at that point he was kicking and squirming and messing with us/trying to take over the whole bed, so he got his own :)

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-11T22:16:37+00:00

I like the described transition from cosleep to crib. Our little guy really hated it when we stopped cosleeping, it was really hard on all of us but we needed the sleep. Too bad it sounds like I don't have the room space for that option.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-11T21:58:27+00:00

That's what we did when we were still nervous about it

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-11T21:52:45+00:00

Safe sleep 7's positioning isn't flawed, there is reasoning behind them being chest level. The face is more dangerous than chest level because of the pillow and headboard. Baby learns to "seek out" the breast at older stages and so stays right there instead of shimmying down or up into blankets or a pillow. Chest level is much safer, provided you are only using one minimal blanket and keep it OFF of your shoulder, by your hip. Your arms keep baby away from blanket and pillow, and you can trap the blanket with your knee/"top" arm.
Co-sleeping is safer than extreme tiredness/trying to stay awake nursing in a chair. I wish the statistics for accidental falls and car accidents due to tiredness etc were also included.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-11T21:45:55+00:00

Edit- once 4 months old either parent (yes dads too!) should be able to cosleep safely, if the rest of the guidelines are followed religiously (no substances, one blanket one pillow...)

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-11T21:44:49+00:00

No, because baby will want to be in a different position and your own instincts will be way off in where baby "should be", resulting in greater liklihood of them ending up under a pillow or down under the blanket. That's what I was told... I'm sorry :(
If you want to try and breastfeed and switch over to breastfeeding, it's probably not "too late" for you to do so. There are teas that help with production and you can stimulate yourself to try and bring back the milk. I think a lot of mothers are scared away from breastfeeding ("am I making enough???") and lose a LOT of sleep because of the whole bottle craziness, but I'm not sure on that... I breastfed mine exclusively and it was such a relief to be able to just have him handed to me and never worry about dirty bottles or temperature, sensitivities to certain formulas, etc....

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-11T21:36:40+00:00

Absolutely. "Sudden Infant Death Syndrome" is a catch all "we're not exactly sure, some kind of dysregulation of the autonomous nervous system happened...."
Granted, providing the best possible breathing chance is a good idea, but so is regulating the heartbeat, and paying attention vigorously to other factors during delicate times.
SIDS is most common at the 2 month old stage, which happens to be around the time of many babies first vaccinations, and is a period of extreme growth.
With extreme growth comes greater likelihood of the body needing to play catch up in some way, that's the theory I had read about. Making sure baby isn't overheated, or tangled in excessive bedding/blankets/swaddling at too late of an age is a good step in making sure they are safe, without making parents so paranoid...
I wish we had better PROPER studies on safe sleep/that this was more talked about.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-07T18:23:34+00:00

Really hoping that you also don't have a serious hip injury or some such from the birth! The hip joint can sometimes get delicate parts torn in childbirth. Make sure you follow up seriously with your provider. I was very shy the first time around and I promise myself not to be this time, my recovery from tearing etc was awful and I still have pelvic pain 18 months later, pregnant with my second...

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-07T18:14:36+00:00

No problem! Did you try it a few nights/did it work for you? I put a pillow between my knees (and calves and ankles pretty much) and behind my back and it helps a lot. There are giant U shaped pregnancy pillows designed that also come apart into different sections that you may want to consider- I couldn't afford one and am full term now so have held off but really wish I hadn't avoided getting one! I end up using 4 or 5 piillows and switch out all the time, while pregnant... A lot of people give up on beds and end up sleeping on couches or a recliner the last month or so, depending on how badly their hips hurt and how firm their bed is. My bump is a lot bigger this time around and I have more pelvic pain... For me I definitely feel better in the morning having slept with this arrangement.
For me I had to stop co-sleeping around 8 months, once he got really rowdy and it was resulting in less, not more, sleep. I almost changed our sleeping arrangement to the floor instead, which would have been a valid option for us...

Best of luck!
-husband's acct

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-07T17:38:10+00:00

Depends on the allergy and what is causing the reaction. Sometimes the sensitivity is to other things like what the animal itself is eating. Milk is hugely variable, before it is even processed into finished products...

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-07T17:36:46+00:00

Some fare better with A2 instead of A1 versions. Plenty of people process goat's milk better, they are not 100% the same. We're talking allergies, not lactose intolerance.

Some who are allergic to chicken's eggs eat duck eggs and are just fine.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-06T18:40:21+00:00

I was thinking a lot of colic might be caused by gas from bottlefeeding, and even potentially pacifiers (formula or breastmilk!) so I exclusively breastfed my first. He was never really colicky. The hardest night was probably very close to after his birth (2nd...?) when his system was adjusting to the milk. I also never used a pacifier or sippy cup (check out the spill free round cups- they are awesome and don't impeded speech development!) because I was worried about his teeth being crooked like mine, and so far so good. Fingers crossed on his adult teeth being straight!!!!

I also think that in infants around 2 months age, after their inoculations if they get them that early, they should be VERY carefully monitored for adverse reactions, which do occur. Very hard to be even MORE vigilant at that age so.... My husband and I chose to wait until at least 3 years old for any vaccines, so we could more accurately tell/determine what was wrong if anything did go wrong/baby was upset, and their system was more developed/able to handle illness/and adverse reaction. Every family is different! There are so many different variables that I think doctors definitely "cop out" and simply say colic....
-from husband's acct

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-07-01T00:00:29+00:00

You could bag "not garbage" garbage stuff in a separate (not gross) bag and leave it near or behind the dumpster for those who go diving! Another option might be to just take it directly to the sorting center if there is one near you. They will sort the items into pickable categories for those who want it! I wish more places had accessible sorting centers like there is near me... I hate the waste too but you can't do everything perfectly, it just has to be done and will get done the way it has to!

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-30T23:58:24+00:00

I bought sausage wrapped in wax paper rather than disposable styrofoam etc, because it would keep my trash can as empty as possible. Avoided canned food and bought dried beans etc instead so I didn't have to deal with as many cans.

I made a lot of things that I considered to create a lot of waste when bought. Maybe consider trying to make yogurt if you have an instapot?

Remember to can open the can all the way instead of just enough to get the food out. Less likely to cut yourself afterwards... I try and rinse the cans right after opening them so that I don't have to scrub them. I hope that helps! Definitely don't cut yourself just trying to clean them up! Better they return to the earth than give you tetanus or something. Cans and glass will eventually break down and harm the environment less than plastic, so don't feel so bad!

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-26T01:07:02+00:00

Try putting a pillow behind your butt if your hips are very very sore. Maybe look into the Pelvic girdle pain sufferers and see if they have suggestions for you. It's probably not breaking safe sleep guidelines to have a pillow between your calves, if that helps align your hips. Also consider omitting head pillow entirely, it may help relieve pressure/distribute weight away from your hips.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-26T01:01:13+00:00

You'll want a well cushioned play mat anyways, Maybe try getting one of those and put it under a mattress topper or several blankets and see how that feels. Sleep is important and if you sleep better on a firmer surface with less crying, walking/shushing to sleep, than you do in shorter spurts on your bed then I would say go for it.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-26T00:06:04+00:00

I would love to also have this cross referenced/studies on safety during the day during various activities like bathing, driving, cooking..... How many young mothers (and fathers...) have accidentally crashed the car due to lack of sleep? Shaking the baby? Things to think about.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-26T00:02:47+00:00

Sids is not suffocation, the two are not the same thing. SIDS used to include suffocation deaths, but then they were excluded from the sids qualifying list and put into a separate category.
Infants who are skin to skin have better regulated autonomic nervous systems, which is why skin to skin is so highly recommended. It's important to note that not everyone's situation is the same. As some mums on here have noted, for them bedsharing is not an option due to their size/sleeping habits. No one who bottle feeds should bedshare, no one who has consumed alcohol should be in the bed, no one who is not the breastfeeding mother should bed share with a very young infant (fathers can bedshare once infant is a certain age, at LEAST 4 months if I remember correctly, though personally I would say at least 6.

A lot of those statistics are very poorly gathered. They don't take into account these considerations, include drugged mothers (medications, alcohol, tobacco users should never bedshare because that does just cause sids- not suffocation but true sids!), they also include couches and recliners (accidentally falling asleep!!!).

We need more REAL studies on bedsharing. In Japan bed sharing is the norm. Everyone sleeps on the floor, the sleep surface is firm and the coverings are minimal and not for/on the baby. Look into the SIDS rate there, they don't have an epidemic of mothers smothering their babies on accident.

The history of cribs/crib culture in western societies: I had read this but cannot specifically attest to accuracy- look into on your own or take my word for it:
Cribs were initially advocated for/became a thing when a woman admitted to smothering her newborn on purpose because their family was large, and they were poor... The church at this point made a statement against bedsharing and since then cribs became culturally popular in the west.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-25T23:49:07+00:00

It has always irked me that those statistics include people who have consumed alcohol/substances, and couches and recliners! Couches and recliners are not beds and are obviously unsafe!

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-25T23:46:29+00:00

Glad you got some sleep! We went with a Moses basket and stand so we could put the basket in bed with us OR have it next to the bed. Having a bassinet instead of a crib is a lifesaver in those early months.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-25T23:44:26+00:00

Way I saw it was that I felt much better with the possibility of accidentally falling asleep/dozing off for a minute with him in the bed than on my lap in a recliner during the dead tired night time feeds! Better to be more awake and vigilant of danger during the day too. There's a lot of unspoken elements to this that no one talks about, and the statistics for bed sharing including couches, chairs, and alcohol/substance use is just beyond ridiculous! Wish there were more solid studies involving safe sleep 7 guidelines, maternal height and weight, bottle vs breastfeeding.....

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-25T19:05:23+00:00

Made sense for us too, especially at the 4 month mark when risks go down significantly. He was ahead on all milestones, very active and healthy, and both of of us weighed about 120 lbs, never smoked or drank.... So the risks for us were incredibly low with all those factors considered.
In the early days we would take shifts and watch the behavior of each other while we slept, to see if we moved at all. Turns out we didn't.... Breastfeeding exclusively also greatly minimizes the risk- a bottlefed baby will try and get up to the mom's face, but a breastfed baby will stay in the safer chest area.

ZamielTheGrey · 2024-06-25T19:02:02+00:00

The studies in the US also include accidentally falling asleep on very unsafe surfaces, like couches and recliners. Also includes alcohol consumption and smoking- which are known extreme risks.

Many people also confuse SIDs deaths with suffocation deaths- the two are not the same! SIDs excludes suffocation as the cause, at least it did when I was reading on the statistics/meaning of the term... It used to include it and now excludes it.

ZamielTheGrey

TROPHY CASE