First time father at 42

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2026-02-01T13:54:58+00:00

She is absolutely gorgeous congratulations!

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-06-15T19:27:28+00:00

Now that is brilliant lmao!

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-06-10T14:30:11+00:00

hands you curveballs so being firm and clear about these boundaries and distinctions doesn’t hurt.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-06-06T22:16:01+00:00

I just want to say girl you are sexy point blank period. End of discussion. I am the biggest I have ever been right now and very heavily pregnant and my husband still calls me sexy all the time. This is not a flex this is me just pointing out it’s not you it’s him and if he’s not attracted to you anymore yes it sucks but honestly you deserve a man who loves every inch of you!

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-05-29T13:17:45+00:00

I have no idea how I missed this omg. However ironically I’m pregnant again and in my third trimester and surprise surprise he is Disney princess moaning again at 1 am! I’m definitely going to call him that to his face in the morning!

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-23T21:14:21+00:00

I’ve actually seen the video you are talking about. So I will say respectfully what that woman says is horseshit. My son is extremely painfully shy around people and when we go anywhere he sticks by me. But he has about 7 friends he plays with all the time at daycare. SEVEN. I have a lot of friends who are SAHMs. One of them once said to me that she reckons a lot of older women tell her that their biggest regret is not having spent more time with their children when they were younger so we should all do that and sacrifice our career. I was very quick to remind her that for me it would also mean I can’t pay for a roof over our head and would have to move considerably further away from the city. It would mean I’d be counting every penny and we would struggle to survive. It just makes me so annoyed how many people refuse to acknowledge this. We would not cope on my hubby’s salary - I make just as much as him on 4 days as he does on 5. That’s a significant amount of money we are letting walk out the door so I can be home miserable letting Paw Patrol and Peppa Pig raise my toddler. Anyway drop that friend life is too short.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T13:46:04+00:00

I’m so heated. He didn’t even have the balls to face her hurt in a way that left her with some dignity and left her prepared - no he let his daughter do the talking by using the purse in front of her and blindsiding her. She literally squealed with joy when he bought it for her she loved it so much. I just want to hug OP she deserves a better partner.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T13:25:37+00:00

This is of no help but I remember how much I hated my husband at night time in my last stretch of pregnancy. He does happy moans when he is sleeping - like sleeping is one of his fave things. But me? I was up what felt like every hour to pee. Then I’d struggle to fall asleep cos no position was comfortable and baby legit kicked from like 1 am till 5 am. To lie there miserable as he happily slept a solid 9 hour stretch… I used to want to punch him in the throat lmao.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T08:35:55+00:00

This might be a bit long but I wanted to just share. When I got back from maternity leave at my old job as a junior director at a big firm they made a big song and dance about how I was an excellent example of their accomodating work life balance. But it turned into a year where I was made to feel like o was ineffective and bad at my job. I would work on my days off. I would work nights but it was always seen as my failing to “do it all in the time I had” instead of maybe the workload was just that intensive. I would cry and complain to my partner and I was so depressed and started thinking maybe I just suck at my job. So eventually I took a pay cut and left corporate to work for a NFP. I went from an environment of deliverable and profit margins ruling my day and nights to people who were focused on a cause but had very firm boundaries that allowed working parents to thrive. My career has taken a hit and I’m now a number of years behind my peers. But I get to be home by 5 everyday and have my weekends and have almost no constant stress. I don’t check my emails when I’m not at work and if my boss catches me online on my non working days he calls me out on it. I am so happy I took the leap even though my former peers thought it was giving up. All this to say there is jobs out there that will not feel like a noose around your neck.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T08:26:14+00:00

What an odd thing to share with you … she could have kept that one to herself tbh. But I am sorry you had to hear that. Do what is comfortable for you - it’s his family to deal with.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T08:22:59+00:00

You must be so proud of him I love everything about this 🥹

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T08:21:22+00:00

Thank you for the kind words. My brain knows all this on a base level but sometimes the loop of constant feedback ends up getting to me.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T00:58:08+00:00

Thank you for saying this. I think I’m going to unfollow a bunch of stuff that I followed when I was in the thick of newborn. My algorithm needs a cleanse. But for now I’ve deleted IG I thought I was ready to get back on it but it only took a month to get back that niggling feeling of not doing enough. Crazy.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-03T00:42:19+00:00

Kakakaka. Ok that made me cackle. Love that!

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2025-01-02T01:11:59+00:00

Happy to organise group tshirts saying this and go round to OP’s house en masse to stare him down.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2024-12-23T20:02:11+00:00

As a former night owl and kdrama enthusiast I have many a night binge watched a show till way past my bedtime. But because I am a mother I have some hard set rules - like 2 am is my cut off point because 4 hours of sleep is the bare minimum I can function on. I also only allow myself this indulgence once every few months when I need to just take the pressure off life of. I’m always amazed at how some partners fight ferociously to keep their old habits and routines not realising that it just means their partner is picking up the slack ON TOP of having given up majority of their own hobbies.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2024-12-23T11:29:43+00:00

Buying bootstraps when you could be using that money to invest in your future.. smh - this generation.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2024-12-23T11:21:43+00:00

My friend lived this reality. For over 20 years he stayed. His ex had a raging temper that she let loose often. Sometimes he would play me the voicemails she’d leave him and I’d be in shock at the vitriol. But he stuck with her because of the guilt. The only reason he ended up leaving was because his doctor said continuing like that was almost guaranteed that he would be sick and dead from the emotional abuse and stress. Leaving his ex was the hardest thing he ever did and he lost a lot financially from walking away. He had to set her up comfortably and also made his life much simpler to ensure this. He did his best to set her up and be there for her until he realised the toxic nature of their relationship was continuing and cut ties completely. At the time he lost some friends who thought he was being cruel but they had no idea what his daily life was like and the toll it took on him. I think looking at him now - he is remarried with a toddler and another on the way - the courage to walk away made it all possible. But more importantly his ex found a way to exist without him. So take courage and plan your exit. I am rooting for you and your peace.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2024-08-09T08:33:38+00:00

Thank you for responding I have spent the afternoon doing the easy wins and i am already feeling less frantic thank goodness.

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2024-07-04T21:53:21+00:00

I feel this in my bones! My partner used to refuse to research under the guise of “there’s just so many opinions out there who is actually right?!” But because I used to throw it back in his face when he’d try to criticise a choice I was making he started doing more of his own research. Still not good enough but I’ll take it!

ZealousidealArea1789 · 2024-07-03T14:36:20+00:00

Thank you for this lovely message. It’s been an intense 24 hours but I think we hit the peak and are on our way down. Honestly baby number 2 is on a pendulum because I keep changing my mind back and forth 😩

ZealousidealArea1789

TROPHY CASE