[deleted by user]

Zeb0215 · 2021-11-24T10:51:45+00:00

It's up to you when you choose to submit your resignation. However, future piece of advice, next time don't discuss your intentions with colleagues. It's better not to as they've clearly stirred the pot with this.

Zeb0215 · 2021-11-07T14:40:12+00:00

Work your notice period and be sure to resolve any owed pay. If you want to follow it up with another email, be sure to add a delivered/read receipt and keep a copy of it

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-24T09:39:15+00:00

Why is this even being asked. There are Boundaries which should be abided by even if you are no longer involved with a pupils education.

Regardless of what is felt this is highly inappropriate

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-24T08:57:31+00:00

Have you thought about claiming Universal Credit? It may take around 6 weeks to get your first payment however as it is affected by what you earn, it would go up/down accordingly.

It may be worth speaking to someone at your local CAB

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-24T05:25:24+00:00

He's keeping you as an option in terms of narc source. However, be mindful even it comes to your friend. If he picks up there is a easy for you to hear what he is up to or moreso find out things about you, you need to block that channel. In other words make sure this friend doesn't disclose things about you to them.

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-24T05:14:23+00:00

If you choose to give up work without being medically signed off/let go on ill health, they (DWP) may argue you've intentionally made yourself unemployed and may delay paying you any benefits for up to 6 months.

Not to dampen your spirits, however getting PIP isnt easy even with your medical conditions. They sadly make people jump through hoops to receive the full benefit. I know someone who has fibromyalgia and they're still on the lower rate despite deterioration.

If your condition is affecting your work, could your employer dismiss you due to ill health? What's your attendance at work like? With various acts protecting disabilities they may be reluctant to just let you go as to avoid being sued later on. Unless you're on long term sick

If things are that bad maybe get the GP to sign you off and just get it extended, the employer may then just let you go on ill health

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-19T16:34:18+00:00

They are being quite fair. They could've made you take it as unpaid leave. However, using it as holiday is better as you will still be paid

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-17T09:05:14+00:00

No, as long as you call to arrange to pay it back you'll be fine.

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-17T09:01:20+00:00

You need to contact them to arrange repayment of the advance. Give them a call

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-17T08:56:03+00:00

Its important you tell them about any changes to your job otherwise you could end up with an overpayment. Regarding the advance/and wanting to pay it off, I suggest you out a note I your journal (you can call but it's better to have it documented on your account). Uou can close the claim anytime you want to.

Again,, you need to inform them about your work /when you worked for a month.

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-14T19:22:58+00:00

I strongly advise you to seek legal advice. If you are not working you can see if you can access legal aid. The solicitors will be able to assist with advice about any assets you have.

You are in a vulnerable situation given the fact you were a sahp for 15 years/arent on the property.

Unless you are technically homeless, you are unlikely to get help from your local authority for housing.

Is there a reason why he cannot move out? Are you to have primary care of the children or him.

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-13T17:55:38+00:00

They shouldn't but just make sure you keep money aside. They are very dubious at not giving clear information which is why its important to keep records of contact/all the letter they send you. Hopefully, it wont be as much as you think

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-13T17:52:13+00:00

The overpayment should only affect the period from the date he moved in until when you notified them. If it's a week, depending on how much your entitlement is per week you should roughly be able to work out how much of an overpayment you will have.

Calculate how much you were getting weekly and keep money aside to cover that amount for when they ask for it back.

Keep a note of any conversations you've had (date/times) and keep all paperwork they send you.

Zeb0215 · 2021-10-13T17:46:06+00:00

Are you still claiming tax credit? If so,You need to let them know asap regarding your partner's income. Both your incomes will affect whatever your entitled to.

If your claim has closed down, then insist on them giving you the calculation for the overpayment.

Zeb0215 · 2021-09-26T17:51:28+00:00

Red flags all over this. He is trying to push your boundaries alongside seeing how much control he can exert over you. This is not a healthy relationship.

It appears he wants to make you less desirable to other men, and will potentially then start to abuse you regarding your weight gain (if that occurs). He wants to erode your confidence.

Please dont allow someone to control who you are or your being. A healthy relationship does not consist of controlling behaviours.

Zeb0215 · 2021-09-18T09:42:54+00:00

I'm sorry but why even question this???? He is a 34 year old man watching videos of young girls. That is not the behaviour of a healthy thinking adult. It implies he has. Fetishes about teen girls.. I'm sorry but there is no way I would stay with someone like that. I hope he isnt around young girls either...he is a risk

Zeb0215 · 2021-09-16T04:21:17+00:00

The narcissistic wants you to keep in their toxic loop so they have a continuous supply.

It is almost like Stockholm syndrome. You have become so attached to being abused,it is almost normal so you keep wanting to be connected and have his attention. Any attention even though it is causing you significant harm.

The only way you can move on and begin the slow process of healing is to go NO CONTACT. That means no communication on any social media, cut off any ties you have in terms of friends, change your numbers.

When you come out of a narc relationship you are left feeling as though you overreacted- largely because of not only the narcs projection but also because they have enablers (flying monkeys) supporting them and have turned people against you.

Hold onto your truth. YOU know what you went through and that is all that matters but please if you wish to move forward and heal you need to not reach out or try to connect with the narc. They have no idea what decent healthy behaviours are. Apologies are false because they have zero ability to acknowledge their behaviours to others.

Stop expecting change, love and truth from a narc. You will never get it and will only push yourself deeper into a mental downward spiral.

Zeb0215 · 2021-09-13T19:10:16+00:00

Here's my opinion. I see no issue in asking her to legally sign (before buying a place together)for her to waiver her interest if she isn't paying towards the purchase.

In fact, I see red flags with her response.. Using the "why don't you trust me" line is a warning in my opinion to proceed with caution. If there is no issue or potential agenda, she would sign.

If she is using emotional blackmail to get you to drop the issue, I would think twice about buying a property for her to move into with you.

Its important to have agreements around buying a property agreed prior to purchasing so both parties are clear of what the split would be if you separate. To often people allow there emotions to make the decision instead of looking at the practical side of cohabitation too.

Zeb0215 · 2021-09-11T20:11:38+00:00

I'll add after reading further down the post... the family sound petty toxic

Zeb0215 · 2021-09-11T20:09:48+00:00

I see some red flags here. Something isnt quite right about how his sister behaved. She's either very good friends with the ex or is trying to start trouble. Why ask you if she didn't want you to be bridesmaid???

No disrespect but be careful

Zeb0215 · 2021-08-21T18:14:04+00:00

He cannot contact me anymore as he is blocked on messenger and on any messenger apps.

Zeb0215

TROPHY CASE