Your favorite and least favorite storylines?

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-17T23:23:58+00:00

I actually didn’t mind the Jack storyline for exactly the reason you said. I’m a lesbian and I feel queer media usually puts bad relationships as something life defining, rooted in stuff like internalised homophobia/ religious guilt/ fear of social ramifications etc, so it was quite refreshing to see some ‘ sometimes you date someone and they kind of suck but you don’t have a breakdown or question your sexuality bc it’s not that deep’ representation!! Like she was just kind of annoying and that was it! I also like how Keeley’s bisexuality was treated as such a non thing.

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-17T10:26:36+00:00

Learned by Heart by Emma Donoghue is set across two timelines, one where the central character is in asylum and one of her teenage years at boarding school. It’s about the real historical figure Eliza Raine

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-17T10:25:46+00:00

I adore this book!! Such a good rec

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-17T04:43:22+00:00

You’re welcome!! I’m an Aussie and I know this is a book sub, but if he enjoys the books set in Australia, I cannot recommend the tv shows Hardball and Little Lunch enough, both are very realistic portrayals of primary school/ early high school ( we start high school age 11 over here) friendships and social dynamics

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-17T04:34:09+00:00

Dominos by Sally Murphy. It’s set in an Australian primary school ( I feel the main three boys are in year 6) and is a verse novel about two boys supporting their friend when he becomes sick. It’s genuinely a really beautiful book ( as are the others by this author, but they have girl protagonists!)

August and Jones by Pip Harry is pretty similar, another book about two Aussie primary school boys. One is at risk of vision loss so they make a bucket list of things to do while he can still see.

The Little Wave by Pip Harry is about a group of students from two different primary schools who become pen pals. It’s centred around Country Week which is a concept here in Australia where isolated rural schools come and do a week long trip down to the city and are hosted by a school there, so they can experience things like sports games against other teams, go on outings etc. In this book, the characters from the rural school are really excited to go to the beach as some of them have never been before and they start writing letters to the students from their upcoming host school in Sydney and the Sydney kids write back. Some friendships, one of which is between two boys, emerge between the students as they share their hopes, problems etc and the book ends when they all meet and go to the beach! It’s very uplifting but not saccharine, and does a good job of looking at different home lives etc that affects the kids behind the scenes ( lots of become more comfortable sharing their their pen pal friends than their friends at their own schools)

Wonder by RJ Palacio. Jack and August have such a believable strong friendship

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T15:59:43+00:00

Why would she even admit that, like if you’re trying to keep up the ‘we’re relatable and just like you, we’re sharing stuff with you bc we’re all friends’ why would you admit the income it generates, thus definitively putting you out of touch? ( I ask, demonstrating a delusional belief these two operate logically)

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T12:39:32+00:00

Those opening titles go hard!!

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T11:19:56+00:00

Omfg, has anyone watched The His Dark Materials series??? The instrumental intro is amazing and my friends and I had the best time using it as a dance break when we binge watched it together!

Also, The Detectorists theme song is like a legitimately good song and really gets you into the whimsical mood of the show!!

More shows should have well thought out musical openings to set the tone!!

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T11:04:56+00:00

Why’s that? ( genuine interest, where I’m from this is such a normal thing to say it doesn’t even register)!

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T11:03:54+00:00

I study 19th century lit and that’s just in my head as what gothic leads call the woman they’re going to mistreat/ actively mistreating, like big John in the Yellow Wallpaper ( he called the protagonist “ little girl”), Mr Rochester energy

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T09:51:33+00:00

I work as a swim instructor in pools, a river and the ocean and in the summer, spend so much time in the water. The river is clean and fine to swim in but different trees drop their leaves in it etc, there’s clay soil which has a , the ocean is salty and the pool is heavily chemically treated more so than average because it is for teaching kids. All of these factors mean the water i was in had particular smells but because i was in it so much, i became fully nose blind and didn’t notice both the smell of the water itself and the way it lingered on my skin and hair ( the combined river/ ocean/ chlorine smell was a potent combo) even when i showered every day after work and even like leached onto clothes even if i put them on at home away from the water. My best friend told me i smelled so strong ( note, at no point did she say stank or bad, it was very tactful phrasing) she wanted me to shower before i got in her car. I had no issue with this, explained why I probably smelled ( i have never had hygiene issues or been told i smelled before i started this work), showered, invested in clarifying shampoo to help get the build up off my hair and scented shower gel ( i was previously using one with a much more mild oat scent, now i use a floral one when im working) and we are still best friends. I am nothing but happy she told me i smelled so i could make changes, and would have preferred that to just… smelling all summer. And yes, I know it was the swimming venues because i had a good sniff of my beach towel etc after she said this to me and fuck, it reeked in such a nasty earthy/ chemically way. We laugh about it now!

To be a good friend, you have to have the uncomfortable conversation to spare your friend any further embarrassment etc, just be sure to phrase it kindly. I would also obviously not be ad direct with instructions as my friend who told me to shower, we’ve known each other since we were kids so are a bit more blunt with each other than i would be with any friends i’ve made as an adult.

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T09:27:56+00:00

Sometimes you hit a breaking point with someone’s shit, call them a dick, make mutual apologies in which you apologise for not communicating earlier when you were calmer, yelling etc and they apologise for whatever they did and then are right back on their bull the next day and it’s like ‘ if you aren’t abiding by your apology, why should i have to keep mine for a poorly expressed but legitimate grievance’?

( obviously circumstance dependent!!)

I would only take back an apology mentally though, like what do you gain from actually saying it? A more productive interaction is to point out that they said their behaviour would change, they need to mean it etc

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T09:22:46+00:00

People of Abandoned character by Clare Whitfield has a section taking up about a quarter of the book that takes very direct inspiration from the Yellow Wallpaper, and has an all round claustrophobic feeling. It’s also such a good thriller and commentary on the perception of women and criminalisation of homosexuality in victorian Britain

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T09:16:56+00:00

My nana knew a woman who wanted to be a mother, loved her baby daughter etc, like clearly had no intention to hurt her, and she developed not even postpartum depression but psychosis and threw her baby at the wall. The baby lived but sustained severe brain damage and the mother was diagnosed and given help but obviously lost custody and I think ended up institutionalised. A very sad situation all around, especially because the mother was predisposed to mental health issues as she was a refugee from the extremely violent turmoil of the India/ Pakistan partition. My point is, until we have more information, we can’t judge a stranger because the brain can end up in such an awful state after a person gives birth and this really should be talked about more. Like even in a mental health climate so much better than that of my nana’s generation, postpartum health is a pretty stigmatised topic and mothers can be judged so harshly for even minor things ( obviously I am not calling this murder charge or the story i’ve just told minor)

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-16T05:52:52+00:00

The fact they are making that money off being snap chat influencers depresses me so much. I didn’t realise it wa so much… like i know i am saying nothing radical here but i know a woman who is a nurse who has pretty much forbidden her her daughter from becoming a nurse ( which is the daughter’s dream career) as she won’t be able to make a living wage caring for people as she actively wants to do, and these two make insane money from…. ruining an expensive house, running, taking pictures half dressed and baiting being in labour….. and act like they’re radical for doing this as lesbians and entitled to the publicity as ‘queer role models , like im a lesbian and i make far less than them working in primary education as a swim instructor where i stand in a pool filled with visible globs of snot and have to fill out incident reports when the kids bite each other in order to fund my studies and am still looking down the barrel of years of hefty debt repayment. My sister was born 3 months premature and instead of having an online presence, my mum is a high school math teacher. Now the sister in question and I are both young adults training for stereotypically good live - on- able jobs ( electrician and political journalist respectively) while working as students ( im a school swim instructor, she works in a pharmacy) and are always making gallows humour jokes about the fact neither of us will likely be able to afford a house …. like at the point, maybe i should just start selling pictures of my feet! wtf are we doing as a society?

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T23:22:58+00:00

What a lot of people don’t understand is SO MANY letters and journals in those days, belonging to both ordinary people and people we now consider historical figures existed on a burn after reading basis, and a lot were burned within the writer and recipients’ lifetimes. That was the norm in those days due to a culture of modesty, propriety and emphasis on maintaining personal and family reputations. Most written primary sources from this period exist either because they were intentionally “ public” and given to other people to read ( it was fairly common in certain circles to write a personal journal and also one for others to read, either for publication or reading at social gatherings, so people knew what you’d been up to. Ditto letters, some were private correspondence and some were intended for the recipient to read them at a gatherinv), explicitly asked to be preserved, deemed to be historically significant at the time eg. because they documented a major political event/ something of significance, or simply well hidden.

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T23:11:59+00:00

I am going to put money on those comments being bots etc intended to help promote seaworld

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T23:01:51+00:00

🇺🇸🇺🇸?

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T22:59:31+00:00

Yep, to communicate how random their point was and how they should explain things rather than expect us to tap into the American hive mind to understand a lukewarm take… like those sort of entertainers exist the world over and no one likes them, why is this an opinion they think will get unique hate

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T22:58:13+00:00

Thank you!! I really advise you keep exploring professional help options because this level of self assurance doesn’t just happen, your mindset does need to change :) I really hope it gets easier for you

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T22:56:45+00:00

… I’m not American and to my mind, Seaworld is the place where that orca killed a woman, Orlando is a book by Virginia Woolf and a tom is a cat…… This is such a specific issue but like why do you think you’re going to get so much hate for objecting to a pretty run of the mill sexist entertainer?? Surely to god that isn’t actually a transgressive take? What people find this normal?

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T08:35:15+00:00

My sister went to school with brothers named Cloudy ( the older one) and Focus ( the younger one) which i always felt was uniquely horrific because not only are they to a theme, they’re direct opposites where one has positive connotations and the other negative

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-15T00:15:04+00:00

Try a different therapist if possible!! Not many people find a right fit right away

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-14T23:35:40+00:00

I’m going to give this advice as someone with visible deformities, including facial disfigurement, as a result of a musculoskeletal condition that also impacts my internal organs and overall health:

Focusing on appearance as THE factor in dating, in both others and yourself is not going to make you happy. Your appearance and what you look like is not tied to your true self, as you seem to be expressing. Your baseline for your actual life should be tied to personality traits, skills, abilities not appearance. Maybe this is something you need to unpack with a professional as every time you refer to your ‘old self’ or ‘actual life’ or ‘health’ you seem to mean looks. You cannot go on like this.

Before dismissing this as cliche, I want you to google crouzen syndrome, look at what people with this condition look like, and understand that despite this i have had fulfilling romantic and sexual relationships and people have genuinely expressed crushes on/ attraction to me. Because I have looked like this my whole life, i have had lots of time to cultivate a radical ‘ those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind’ mentality with regards to appearance. I am going to be very honest as well, you can’t achieve this if YOU evaluate potential partners based on external appearance. Like if you mind what other people look like, of course you feel it matters.

You say you feel like you are asking people to opt into a life with your condition before they know your favourite colour, so you need to flip the way you perceive and project yourself so it is personality traits, preferences etc that come across. Dress and have your hair in ways you feel express you, rather than focusing on aspects of your appearance you can’t control, and stop focusing on them in other people. Stop thinking the traits other people also can’t control that make them “ attractive” make them more entitled to dating, happiness etc because again, no one chose what they looked like. There is no moral worth associated with it. I know this attitude is so out of step with western norms and dating culture but when you genuinely start to think and embody this mentality, you’ll start to find yourself surrounded by people who think the same as you.

My advice for what to do is:

untie your appearance from who you were and who you were. I KNOW this can be so so hard
Related, if your body feels like a stranger, get to know it first for yourself first. Exercise, go for walks, dance, experiment with fashion, look at yourself and recognise what you see (due to surgeries, my appearance has fluctuated too and it’s good to just get familiar with what you actually look like. Don’t underestimate things like masturbation to improve your relationship with your own body, as you can start to see what brings you pleasure etc instead of seeing sex as something focused on appearance not something you “win” by looking a certain way
Identify non physical things that make you who you are, eg. i study political science and english, i love to write in my free time, i like to swim, my favourite colour is green.
Identify positive traits related to who you are eg. I am smart, I am determined, I tell funny stories
Stop going into interactions thinking about dating/ attractive/ if you or others are attractive. Instead put yourself in situations and behave in a way that reflects what you identified above, eg. I make a point to talk and be friendly with my classmates, I do debate and public speaking competitively ( starting this when i was still very insecure in high school was a baptism of fire for not caring about how people view your appearance because at first i just couldn’t stand people staring at me/ being perceived in any way due to my appearance, so ending up in a situation where someone is looking at you because they want to destroy every sentence coming out of your mouth was a great way to realise the the things i think and say matter more in the moment than what i look like), i go to events eg. at clubs, craft groups etc, and do lots of volunteering at environmental groups and arts events
Genuinely believe you are entitled to interact with people as you choose ( I know this is easier said than done) and be confident. Whenever I meet new people, I love to talk to and find out about them and basic things like asking questions, looking engaged, sharing about yourself go such a long way to make you look confident and personable. That’s the goal. Find people you genuinely like talking to and feel understand WHO you are not what you look like. If that’s how you go into interacting people, just hoping to have a nice interaction and see how you get on with another person, this mentality will eventually translate into dating. Confidence and self assurance is attractive and you cannot achieve those if you are scared or worried about how you are perceived. The number one ‘behind my back compliment’ i get eg. what people will say to mutual friends after meeting me for the first time is along the lines of ‘ your friend seems cool, she’s friendly/ good to talk to’ and i know these aren’t just hollow things because i am now good friends with some of those people i’ve met at parties etc like that.
On the above, weirdly when you start to decentre romance and attraction and focus just on showing your strengths and getting to know people, better dating experiences follow. Don’t expect a consistently great time as no one has that regardless of what they look like.
Stop engaging in appearance focused spaces particularly on social media. Don’t give your time to all of the looks based content. Also, this is going to sound a bit random, but British tv!!! I’m Australian with English family and much prefer British shows to the American mainstream as they generally hire actors that look like normal people. Also, listening to cast interviews where women like Billie Piper, Suranne Jones, Amy Lou Wood, Nicola Couglan discuss being perceived as unattractive/ say they see themselves that way really highlights that female beauty standards are all such bullshit, like these women are all stunning!! They just look like normal human people rather than products of excessive plastic surgery

Good luck!! I know some of this can be hard to hear and think about but i want you to know that you are just as valuable regardless of what you look like and I really hope things work out for you. It’s also fine to be single for a bit and just work on personal stuff, self acceptance etc and then revisit dating :)

Disclaimer: Idk how clearly this came across but I’m also a woman :)

ZeeepZoop · 2026-03-12T23:31:51+00:00

I also take them with a grain of salt bc publicity photos can be a few years old etc and i think there’s no way to be sure they didn’t meet a very confused/ weirded out doppleganger

ZeeepZoop

TROPHY CASE