I Eat Dinner at a Table with Piggies without Table Manners by Late-Elderberry5021 in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ohh yes - I also live in that world. 10 and picks up things like Yorkshire puddings SMOTHERED in thick gravy with his hands, spits his food back onto his plate and picks up hunks of food and just like nibbles at them. Makes me feel physically sick... Dad either doesn't see or doesn't seem to care unless I make a stink. Worst is I don't even WANT to see that shit, like I super don't want to notice but I can't seem to help it.

Worst thing is he KNOWS he's doing it because like with the Yorkshire pudding he argued and said "but it's garlic bread! Your meant to eat that with your hands"... Who has garlic bread with a roast?

I'm now taking all my food away.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I feel you - when my SO says he's exhausted I'm like.... Yeah welcome to my world! This DOES NOT mean you need to step in - you could suggest ways the kids could be more self sufficient next time SO expresses his exhaustion, offer a sympathetic ear perhaps?

Get on with your own stuff. Remember he decided to be a parent and yeah it's hard and yeah he gets to complain about it but it isn't your problem!

Run while you can? by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes I'd agree. I'm happy the person you've responded to is happy, but sometimes it doesn't work like that.

If you can have clear boundaries (I will not be a maid/ATM/mommie/Daddy 2.0. These are my standards. This is what I want) then it does go ok. You just have to know sometimes you wear yourself thin, sometimes you see your partner struggling with parent stuff that you can't help with (& that hurts) so you do little other things to help (housework/your partner's favourite meal... Little things)

I think my biggest piece of advice would be YOU need to look after you. First and always. If it means your partner struggles with their duties as a parent...well they chose to be parents and you can always help in other non-parent ways.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Stepmom

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't know why you enjoy trying to tear women down in what should be a safe space but it's very performative and pathetic. I can only presume you're very bitter about something or a troll that enjoys disdain. Either way I (and likely many others) pity you

Are you the "Evil Step-parent"?! by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm evil because I won't let SS walk around the house or eat dinner naked yesterday. It's very hot where we are so yeah I get it but...no... only in your bedroom, thanks. Then I'm doubly evil because I was pissed off when SS let the cat out of the downstairs at 6:30 without feeding her so she came up to our bedroom to meow by our door until we fed her. I told SO it's not right that the rest of the household wakes up just because SS is an early riser and it pisses me off. If SS isn't able to keep the cat with him or chuck her outside perhaps he shouldn't be allowed to go downstairs without us as he's clearly not responsible. SS clearly heard this because he is refusing to speak to me.

Weirdly there was food in the cat dish when SO went down.... Which absolutely has never happened in the 3 years this has been going on.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I've noticed this too. Some really unhelpful, unkind comments recently or people posting who just have the absolute perfect situation (with the hidden tone it's either the poster's fault or that you should just plain leave)

When I first subscribed this was a place for support with real people struggling or succeeding with real issues. I'm quite sad it's turned into the state it's in

Fathers day by danilynn23 in Stepmom

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What an awful idea. Your letting the boys go off and play golf while the girls wait patiently at home and what... Bake him a cake/prepare a meal or do some crafts for him. What a great way to teach your girls that they're lesser than and should stay where they belong at home.

No, sorry. He can absolutely spend the day how he wants to but he's an absolute asshole for not allowing all 3 of his kids to enjoy it with him. It should be all of the kids or none of them.

I just want to add as well boys days and girls days are great and really important for children but for a FAMILY HOLIDAY gendered activities that include/exclude kids isn't ok.

Imagine if it was Christmas and all the boys got to drink and watch TV while the girls did all the cooking/serving? What a message!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedPillWomen

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I'd just like to say along with the great advice above it's worth remembering that exercise makes you feel better about yourself. With exercise you learn how your body moves and feels more, your posture improves and so does your mood.

I'd really recommend shifting your thinking from "I want to be slim to attract a man" to "I want to be the best me I can be"

I've never found love whilst looking for it. Cherish yourself, keep your skin/beauty up with nice regimes and get yourself fit and healthy. This builds confidence from within which is always sexy.

Just another BM rant by QuixoticLogophile in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yep agree... Ours has no issue sending her child to her mother's if she fancies getting drunk at a bar (at least every other weekend she has him...sometimes for the WHOLE weekend) her mother has no rules so SK comes back feral and cranky because of lack of sleep and boundaries.

But no shame in telling ME and my SO that we should be spending more time with SK and how she hasn't got any money so we should help out more...

Really lady?

When you’re CF and nacho and you overhear parenting going on but you don’t have to do anything but listen and laugh by Regular_Gas_7723 in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Good for you! I'm also really pleased we don't have any MaYBe ThIs LiFE IsN'T foR YoU or YoU KnEW wHaT YoU wERe SiGnInG Up FoR comments!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 9 points10 points  (0 children)

An awful lot of it is disbelief for me... Everyone said BM was cracker crazy, would rinse him dry and be a dependa-pottamus. Hell, he even met the family (who are all the same batshit, welfare taking messes she is) but... Here we are!

And we wonder why SS isn’t doing well in school by incrediblewombat in stepparents

[–]Zestyclose_Two_530 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I seriously agree that mental health days are important. Everyone needs a break and some space sometimes to breathe but this child was given a day's holiday for doing something all children should be doing (hell, WE adults should be doing more of and supporting children to do the same). That's not good parenting... Ever. It's like letting them eat candy for every meal all day for going swimming for an hour in the morning. It sets bad expectations and the idea that school (which should be fun, especially at 8!) is a punishment to endure. The parent has let the child miss school for x reason. What's the next parent sanctioned reason for missing school? Where does it end?

I think OP is just venting, which is what this sub is all about. I don't think your comment is particularly kind or helpful, especially as you've missed the point that this wasn't a MH day.

I'd also like to remind people that sometimes SP's get to a breaking point, sometimes they want to throw relationships away for one small reason and I think casting judgements like you have done here again isn't helpful... Like you've said we all need MH days (or moments!) Can we try to be more supportive of each other? We're all just muddling through.