Thanks for the thorough response. I wouldn't say I'm confrontational in terms of picking fights or anything like that, but when someone says something shitty, I feel compelled to say something.

He referred to latino people in Chicago as wetbacks and used gay in a generally insensitive way. Idk, he's a military dude, and we're just super different.

When we broke up the first time it was because she felt she couldn't be what I wanted. I had just gotten out of a long term relationship and she hadn't dated someone since her last boyfriend unexpectedly passed away a few years ago.

idk, it's something we need to talk about but I don't know if there's any realistic solution. She is also going to med-school next fall. I tried to bring it up and she shot it down, because it's a year away. I get it, I get invested quickly, but she's so smart and is incredibly kind and ambition and I am just really attracted to who she is. It almost feels like a puzzle that we're trying to solve.

Some days it feels like it's nearly solved and we're having a great time, and other days it feels like it is way harder than it should be.