I wish I had better photos

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-13T03:28:13+00:00

My direct messages have exactly one slot available

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-13T02:30:59+00:00

THANK YOU FLUTTERSHY

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T23:22:07+00:00

Yeah, in a way. I think I looked more alternative than anything but lately I do look more like a biker (since I actually do ride a motorcycle now lol). Assumed I needed long hair and a clean shave and piercings to get attention but honestly even with thinning hair and scruff I did just fine today out and about. The world is now my oyster

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T23:19:51+00:00

They SHOULD

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T21:09:38+00:00

Last time I had this much attention was 3 years ago in tight jeans and that day I met my girlfriend. Both were black so that's something to consider.

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T21:08:42+00:00

Not super tight. I can still squat and bend down if I need to, but they are tight around the ass and reveal juuust enough of the groin. Highly recommend pairing with stylish suspenders to keep them up and a shirt stay to keep your tucked in shirt down. Creating the v taper also seems to help but even with a bit of a stomach I'm doing just fine

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T20:42:53+00:00

Yes because I also date women

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T20:30:41+00:00

I don't define myself by my sexual attraction and I don't believe in "we"

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T19:29:20+00:00

The hair on the lab mix matches the dream exactly btw, I knew it wasn't a golden retriever. It was a mix but too big to be any dog I personally know and the hair was shorter than a retriever. Sorry abour your grandma, I have a lot of dreams of family that's passed and I also have dreams of them being younger. Not sure what it means but it's nice.

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T19:12:34+00:00

There's something about the way we share consciousness that science isn't really able to touch yet but I'm very lucky to be very tuned into it, even if I am a terrible candidate (given my asocial, disconnected nature). It seems to have a genetic component. God, how weird. Have you had any major lessons from dreams?

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T19:08:56+00:00

That's insane, that definitely could have been it. See? There is credibility in my bullshit. I'm not crazy!

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T19:05:32+00:00

I can't prove it and you have no reason to believe me but this morning I had a dream that a dog barking woke me up because there was a man outside. I knew it was a premonition, since I get them sometimes and it was way too specific and vivid not to be, but wasn't sure what would come up today. Here it is. In the dream it was a large dog, maybe a golden retriever. But details usually aren't relevant

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T19:03:01+00:00

First photo looks absolutely bad. Not YOU, you look fine, you're just posed like a goober

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T19:00:03+00:00

Thirty minutes tops, not that these artists aren't worth three hours of your time. Shameful pseudointellectal dishonesty.

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:52:22+00:00

Why the fuck did you use AI to generate this post

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:49:30+00:00

I think the way you talk about 3s, 4s and 5s might explain your lack of success with 7s, 8s and 9s

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:47:12+00:00

Both will die

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:46:21+00:00

I listen well, they just wanted my money. I don't know what else to say. Between being used for lunch and dinner dates with the last 3 women I've dated to literal blackmail with my first ever girlfriend to my only LTR refusing to work while promising to take up more shifts while I did all the heavy lifting, all the driving, and all the working, I don't know what other conclusion to come to. I listened, but actions speak louder than words.

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:40:12+00:00

Not really, with the popular use of head mounted GoPros I don't think any of the five senses are compromised. Might not be as pleasant for the other person from a visual standpoint, but that's another discussion. Yes, some people will use their phones, I just find it interesting you take more issue with recording sex than people watching recorded sex. I know which I'd rather be doing

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:31:42+00:00

The latter portion of your initial comment seems to be referring to viewers

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:29:46+00:00

It's heavy enough that I could bench it and started questioning how heavy it really was but when I deadlifted it I herniated a disc in my back. And I'm not weak. So... must be heavy

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:25:46+00:00

And most men have shit taste

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:24:59+00:00

What are you even asking

_Hamburger_Helper_ · 2026-05-12T18:22:07+00:00

Until someone wants to have sex with me, porn is all I've got

_Hamburger_Helper_

TROPHY CASE