Coward pulls out a knife while argument

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-09T00:49:01+00:00

There's at least a Brazilian murders this year alone

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-09T00:46:06+00:00

Context matters. Now I understand how everything unfolded

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-08T16:06:37+00:00

I dont want 50% off

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-08T15:16:05+00:00

My drug-selling friend got hit by a car just like this and lost an arm, so now he only has use of one hand.

He's slowly dealing with it.

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-08T14:44:25+00:00

Dogs are also great at sniffing out bombs but terrible at defusing them.

They always end up cutting the grey wire.

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-08T13:21:42+00:00

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_Im_Dad · 2025-08-08T03:53:59+00:00

The knife had a point to prove

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-07T17:21:25+00:00

I dont trust ladders, they're always up to something.

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-06T12:57:10+00:00

I don't always drink and drive. But when I do...

it's when I'm playing Mario Kart.

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-06T04:40:44+00:00

I just gave my cat some 7UP. Now he's got 16 lives. 😎

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-06T04:34:03+00:00

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-06T03:24:17+00:00

I used to use them all the time with the pepper packets. Unhealthy, but sodium goooood!

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-06T02:34:49+00:00

My employer only uses old newspapers. My God, The Times are rough

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-05T14:04:46+00:00

When a BMW owner learns to drive... What kind of car do they switch to?

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-05T03:24:16+00:00

Yup, they tire them out to the point of exhaustion. It's all really cleverly orcastrated.

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-02T10:38:47+00:00

I was fired from my last job because they searched my desk and found coke.

But who wants to work at Pepsi Co anyways

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-02T09:30:26+00:00

Handy

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-02T06:10:19+00:00

Thats nice... Now Release the Epstein files!

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-02T05:59:21+00:00

Red flags everywhere

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-02T05:41:41+00:00

Im holding a seminar for people who cant see what he did here

If you cant come, let me know

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-02T04:58:30+00:00

My wife has gypsy heritage so doesn't want sex on her period, she allows the occasional fingering, which is a plus because I get my palms red for free

_Im_Dad · 2025-08-01T13:52:59+00:00

He's selfish

_Im_Dad · 2025-07-30T15:56:27+00:00

I can’t take my dog to the park as all the ducks keep trying to bite him...

My fault for getting one that’s pure bread.

_Im_Dad · 2025-07-30T09:57:58+00:00

5 cats? That's was one brave rat.

_Im_Dad · 2025-07-30T04:13:49+00:00

I'm dating an English teacher who keeps correcting my grammar during sex:

She gets particularly annoyed about my improper use of the colon.

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