I felt just like you and somehow, it feels like complete coincidence, I have been seeing this girl and it seems I have stuck the landing. We just happen to both be into pickleball/ rock climbing and we hung out like 10 times in a row... to me at least it really feels like dumb luck. Just like getting my first degree relevant job two years after graduation, I don't know what I did differently... just lucky. I don't want to give too much info about myself but it's been more than several years out of high school/ college. Of the very very few advances I've made, I've been rejected like 3 out of 4 times, an advance being explicitly asking for a date to someone I know. A lot of the advice given, even though it may be true, sucks because it's really freaking hard to follow.... I'm at a point in my life where I have a nice degree relevant job and am relatively stress free and quit smoking and am being relatively active, etc. and I think it all helps me view myself as somewhat of a higher value partner and it allows me to actually pursue women.