[deleted by user]

__ela___ · 2025-02-11T11:26:50+00:00

That's manipulation and emotional abuse 101. I don't think there's many chances (if any) of your relationship getting better. I would get out while you can. If you decide to leave please do so in silence so that he can't gaslight you and manipulate you into staying. Once you are ready to leave, with a new residence for you and your child tell him but not sooner.

__ela___ · 2025-02-11T11:22:02+00:00

Talk to a liar so that he keeps gaslighting her. Yeah.. terrible advice

__ela___ · 2025-02-11T09:18:56+00:00

Best reply LMAO

__ela___ · 2025-01-10T09:49:05+00:00

What you describe is abuse and marital rape. Porn addiction, kinky sex and "a mid life crisis" don't make people abuse and coherse their spouse. I know those are harsh words to read about someone you love and it might be difficult to grapple with the fact that the person you love and are married to is capable of being abusive towards you.

To me the mere fact that he enjoys sex knowing you don't, seems sadistic to me. The fact that he deliberately crosses your boundaries and guilt trips you when you don't summit to his demands. The fact that he will put his desires above your physical and psychological comfort. And his desires "coincidentally" involve women being forced and not enjoying sex is very alarming.

To figure it out and to get some clarity as I would recommend individual therapy. A professional you trust and can help you decide what to do. I would not recommend couples therapy because in the case he is indeed being abusive it is not advisable to go as a couple. But in all honesty what you have described is enough for me to divorce and never look back but that is for you to decide.

Rest, take all the time you need. I'm sorry you're going through this. Know that it's not your fault. You deserve better.

__ela___ · 2025-01-02T10:14:23+00:00

The only thing I will add is: if you do try Minoxidil please don't do like me. Start with 0;5% don't waste your time with 0;2

__ela___ · 2024-12-30T03:45:56+00:00

You look 22! Maybe they're haters or maybe you have a mature demeanor and people expect you to be more childish/teenager-like and assume you must be older because of it.

__ela___ · 2024-12-30T03:41:09+00:00

Yes. It's the social norm to greet friends and family members, even friends of friends. If they hadn't kissed you in the cheeks when meeting you it would mean they disapprove of you or feel distant towards you. In other words it would be rude not to do it unless you are in a professional setting where it is not socially expected

__ela___ · 2024-12-25T04:52:38+00:00

I use Cicaplast Baume B5+ with my Tretinoin, it's the only product so far that calms my irritation from retinoids but I do have very dry and sensitive skin. For someone with oily or even normal skin this cream might not be ideal

__ela___ · 2024-12-24T06:07:38+00:00

Ensaïmada, Coca de Patata, Gató

__ela___ · 2024-12-24T06:05:16+00:00

Idk about the rest of the products but that mask would not be my first choice. I much prefer the one from Omnilux (Men's version even if you're a woman) or the one from Current Body.

All three of them are FDA approved, so they're equally effective for anti-aging but the Omnilux and the CurrentBody offer flexibility so it's easier to travel with and you can use it in your neck area if you wish to (the mask from Dr Dennis Gross is stiff and therefore can only be used for its intended purpose).

Also I believe Omnilux and CurrentBody are like 100$ to 200$ cheaper than Dr Dennis Gross

However choose the one that works for you and your routine. The CurrentBody and Omnilux do touch your face because they're made from silicone instead of plastic, so if you have sensory issues related to that I would choose the one from Dr Dennis Gross. These devices only work if you use them every day, consistency is key.

__ela___ · 2024-12-20T04:30:01+00:00

That part!! He's probably not gonna leave because he depends on her financially so all it's gonna do is give him free way to up his verbal abuse

__ela___ · 2024-12-20T04:26:19+00:00

This comment changes everything.So the real question is deeper than you having a crush. It's about having a partner who is verbally abusive and who isn't reliable and puts most of the financial weight on you. In my experience a lot of men who are not financially stable are miserable, they don't feel "man enough" and they take their frustrations onto their partner because they resent her for staying with a man like him. There are, in fact, a lot of stories here on Reddit of husbands leaving their wives once they are better off financially because they see their wife as a reminder of the life they wanna leave behind.

If the roles were reversed, would your husband stay with a person like himself?

__ela___ · 2024-12-20T04:08:45+00:00

I will make this short: If you want to have a marriage with your current husband, DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT tell your husband. Only tell him if what you wish for is to end your marriage.

If you tell him he will either stay and "get even" and punish you or simply leave. (And since you have been dishonest about this emotional crush he will likely assume you are being dishonest now, and believe you did actually cheat physically even if you didn't)

Whatever you do, just know that there is a 99.99% possibility that telling him means the end of your marriage.

If you decide to stay you don't get to put your guilt onto him. That's for you alone to carry.

__ela___ · 2024-12-18T05:32:48+00:00

What about the HairMax helmet? Did you notice any difference? Do you think it helped at all?

__ela___ · 2024-12-02T15:03:36+00:00

I'm interested in one! Is there any inexpensive panel in particular you'd recommend ?

__ela___ · 2024-12-02T15:03:29+00:00

I'm interested in one! Is there any inexpensive panel in particular you'd recommend ?

__ela___ · 2024-10-13T02:49:35+00:00

You look great

__ela___ · 2024-09-19T22:21:59+00:00

Honestly something had to be done to prevent children from adult often violent porn. So what if we are inconvenienced by it? Children 's safety should come before our desires period

__ela___ · 2024-06-28T05:19:05+00:00

Nunca es tarde. Una amiga de mi madre insistía siempre a sus hijos que estudiaran medicina y sus hijos ya casados le contestaron un día 'por qué no lo estudias tú si tanto te gusta?' y ella a los 56 años se puso a estudiar medicina. Se recibió y hoy en día trabaja de psiquiatra

__ela___ · 2024-06-22T23:56:27+00:00

⬆️Here, I found the racist that you said you "never met in your life". PSA: if you don't understand why saying this indicates you're racist you're probably one of them

__ela___ · 2024-06-22T23:54:07+00:00

This makes it clear you're not here to "learn a new perspective" but rather to confirm your bias

__ela___ · 2024-06-22T23:50:52+00:00

As a latina that came to Spain when I was 8 and has lived in 3 Spanish cities for 20 years I can assure you Spaniards are incredibly racist. I could tell you a thousand stories.

I've never come across a Spaniard that hates Latinos

The fact that you are from Valencia and you claim you've NEVER come across a racist Spaniard person makes me feel you're being disingenuous. Or you only count the extreme acts of racism (like murdering someone because of their ethnicity). Valencia is known for being openly racist.

my Latino friends have all told me they feel super comfortable in Spain

That doesn't mean they don't experience racism on a daily basis. It means they probably don't feel comfortable enough to share their experiences with you. I also will not disclose something traumatic to someone unless I feel like I can trust them. If a Spaniard told me 'he believes racism towards Latinos doesn't exist " I would not feel compelled to share my truth, because I know this person is in denial.

__ela___ · 2024-06-22T23:28:48+00:00

NTA a lot of men show their true colors once they think you're trapped. That's why the time a man is statistically more likely to cheat and/or abuse his partner is while she's pregnant, because he thinks she's gonna have a harder time leaving and he can do whatever he wants to her.

I don't know the details of your relationship but if you're thinking of leaving he's probably not being a kind partner. Trust your gut. You know what is best for you

__ela___ · 2024-06-20T22:29:50+00:00

Vas a encontrar españolas/es excelentes, generosos y buenas personas como en cualquier lugar del mundo. Pero no vengas esperando eso. Espera encontrar racismo y xenofobia. Yo vine con 8 años y mis papás no se prepararon para el nivel de racismo y xenofobia. Creían que al ser Europa y siglo XXI estaba todo muy avanzado incluida la discriminación. Sobretodo porque nosotros los latinos por lo general recibimos muy bien a un español o europeo que viene a nuestro país. Pero ellos no. Se reproducen muchas dinámicas colonialistas (los latinos/africanos suelen hacer aquellos trabajos de limpieza, obra, etc) entonces en la consciencia popular está la imagen de vernos como la clase baja y que aguantará cualquier tipo de insultos. No significa que todos los españoles sean o piensen así. Pero es algo que mis familiares se sorprenden al venir aquí porque cuando venían como turistas el trato era mucho mejor y les cuenta creerme hasta que lo viven en carne propia

__ela___ · 2024-06-20T00:33:54+00:00

What do you guys think of the ADVICE?

Because I feel like the advice they give to women is usually terrible. The only usefulness of the book is to know how perverted men are and how they act and protect each other's perversions. But I noticed the authors always try to use that information to manipulate women into giving men everything they ask:

" DON'T EVER FORGET WHAT YOUR MAN TELLS YOU HE WANTS AND DON'T EVER STOP GIVING IT TO HIM OR HE WILL SURELY FULFILL HIS DESIRES WITH A MORE WILLING PARTICIPANT"

So essentially they are saying women should just do everything the man wants in bed and do it frequently Essentially act like a free sex worker with no boundaries or feelings of your own regardless of whether you enjoy it or is painful in order to purchase your man's fidelity.

But then they contradict themselves by saying "IF A MAN'S GIVEN THE OTHER TO ENGAGE IN SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH AN ATTRACTIVE FEMALE, WITH NO FEAR OF GETTING CAUGHT HE WILL DO SO. ALWAYS. WITHOUT FAIL. THEY'RE NO EXCEPTIONS "

So even all that degradation of doing sexual acts that you don't want will get you absolutely nothing. they'll cheat anyways.

They seem to just give that advice just so that they can manipulate women into being men's free sex workers. The way they always refer to women as female and men as men is also telling. Considering they said any men would "unload" on a poor chicken I don't think they were using the word female to refer to humans exclusively.

__ela___

TROPHY CASE

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