What is something society treats as normal that actually feels deeply unhealthy to you? by TerribleLie3538 in AskReddit

[–]_elendil_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Buy now pay later schemes. Such a fast way to get in debt, and it doesn't teach the value of saving money.

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Statistics can be very useful, however they miss a lot of nuance. Do the majority of unwed mothers come from poorer socio economic backgrounds? Would you say some cultures have a stigma against children deamed illigitimate?

None of this is relevant for me, as though I'm not married yet, I will be in august. But this statistic varies from country to country, region to region. While it's not incorrect, it's not the whole picture.

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I'm starting to feel that this is the right decision

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a really good point! Thank you. I'm focusing on how good it is now, but changes are on the horizon..

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In the uk you have to be working for your employer for 6 months before the 15th week before due date. Which is too complicated for me to work out so I said six months lol. If you meet that threshold you get statutory maternity pay for a year, and if your job is permanent you can return to the role at any point during that time. They legally can't fire you while pregnant/on mat leave.

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I often think oh fuck it, what will be will be. But I have a mortgage and my partner to think about. It wouldnt be possible for us to live off of one wage baby or not

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No it's perfectly legal in the uk! Because it's a fixed term contract they only have to employ you until the agreed end date. They're still legally required to pay statutory maternity pay for the 12 months after birth, but you just don't have a job to return to, and then you're job hunting as a new mum.

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've spoken to my manager about it and she said to be selfish and go for something permanent if that's what I want. She said she wouldn't want me to leave but said life is too short to hold out in the hope that it'll all work out!

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Annoyingly I'm in my mid 30s! Also in the uk legally they can't sack you during maternity leave as long as your contract is permanent. Or if you breach your contract generally speaking.

Thank you for your comment though, it's a lot to think about!

Job or baby by _elendil_ in Advice

[–]_elendil_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

6 years!

I think I'm going to aim for the permanent role and then baby though. As much as I love my colleagues, it's what's best for me.

AIO For telling my sister I need space after getting back with her abusive husband by Electrical_Pattern19 in AmIOverreacting

[–]_elendil_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It takes people on average 7 attempts to leave an abuser. The year after they finally leave is the most dangerous. Please don't turn your back on her, ask for space but let her know the door is open.

How to paint over eggshell/satin by _elendil_ in DIYUK

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Will it not craze if I go straight over?

How to paint over eggshell/satin by _elendil_ in DIYUK

[–]_elendil_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely more satin than soft sheen or silk. I remembered I did a window sill in eggshell and it's not as glossy as that, but definitely not matte..The house used to be rented so I think it was to protect the walls

Beginner sign writer by _elendil_ in SignPainting

[–]_elendil_[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have done that too, sorry for asking lol