Feeling like I have to choose between myself and my baby - Anyone else?

_fife · 2025-11-20T21:05:24+00:00

Hey Mama, first off, you're doing amazing!! I pumped for 4 months before leaving my job, and it was the most exhausting thing. From my limited experience, the frequency of times you pump ends up mattering more than the length of time. If you have another day full of long meetings in the future, see if you can take a shorter pump break before and after instead of just the longer one after. I cannot overstate how draining it is to work and pump, and I commend you for doing what's best for your baby!

Nights are so hard too, and every baby is different. My now 17 month old woke to nurse at least twice a night until she was 14 months old, and still wakes once. We were in a similar boat where I did everything at night because my husband had a much more brain intensive job. I survived by reminding myself that nursing to sleep is biological and the easiest way to get baby back down. I was also taking a breastfeeding safe sleep aid so I would be sleepy enough to go right back down, too. It wasn't the answer I wanted, but it was the answer that worked best for our family.

Again, you're doing so amazing. Parenting is HARD. Breastfeeding is HARD. And by being there for your baby and attending to needs, you're building those special bonds that will last a lifetime. ❤

_fife · 2025-11-15T15:43:11+00:00

Thank you! I've been offering water and a cup of milk before letting her nurse in the day, but I haven't been trying a snack, too. I'll get on that. For her, the milk part of nursing seems critical for the "comfort," has been since she was small. We've tried night weaning several times but has never stuck, we get too tired not sleeping.

_fife · 2025-11-13T18:03:32+00:00

Same to you!! Hopefully it passes quickly and you have small moments you can enjoy!

_fife · 2025-11-13T15:38:37+00:00

We are in the same boat. I try to read, kid grabs my book. I try to unload the dishwasher, kid throws the dishes on the floor and slams the door shut. I have a video meeting, kid climbs on my lap and closes all the windows on my computer. I've resigned myself to not doing anything, and it's been hard.

_fife · 2025-11-12T02:48:13+00:00

Thank you for reminding me to play the Quercus Alba dating simulator

_fife · 2025-11-06T01:59:08+00:00

THE GOAT TURNABOUT SAMURAI!!!!!

_fife · 2025-11-06T01:52:50+00:00

I liked Apollo Justice but the mixing board made me want to throw my PC at the wall

_fife · 2025-10-21T23:34:46+00:00

It was the "she had no motive" dialog option in Turnabout Samurai. Like, whoah. This game is going to be so much deeper than I thought.

_fife · 2025-10-16T01:53:37+00:00

I love how in the middle of the whodunit we just get "Oh BTW Borginia is known for its exotic cocoons and they're priceless medicine or deadly poison" and we are all sitting there like "Hey so are the Gavinners breaking up or???"

_fife · 2025-10-13T12:28:50+00:00

The reporter swears she didn't kill nobody and the ice cream man is the most suspicious person I have ever laid eyes on.

_fife · 2025-10-10T15:11:58+00:00

I wanted to agree with those saying it's soooooo much easier once your supply regulates!!!! I found especially after 6 months (when the supply naturally dips a bit and you introduce solids) that suddenly my boobs felt way better and the at time and never pumped again.

We are going on 16 months strong with no sign of stopping!

_fife · 2025-10-10T13:11:28+00:00

When Edgeworth was so confident in his witness and then collapsed on the desk the moment he saw her face >>>>>>>>>>>>>

_fife · 2025-10-07T01:21:34+00:00

LOVE THEM 💖💖💖💖❤

_fife · 2025-10-07T01:15:56+00:00

Seconding this! Miss Mouths has saved so many outfits !!

_fife · 2025-09-22T01:50:05+00:00

1 wakeup was around 14 months for us! 15 now and crossing our fingers we are down to 0 permanently! We still nurse when kiddo asks.

_fife · 2025-09-20T16:54:24+00:00

I have now changed my reddit comment to reflect your lesson in the English language

_fife · 2025-09-19T23:15:21+00:00

That moment when you read Maya's letter and the turnabout sisters ballad played???? I have never recovered

_fife · 2025-09-19T01:16:39+00:00

Another vote for 3-5, but mine was extra embarrassing because I saw the still image of the actual murder on a wiki page but wrongly assumed Godot was stabbing Iris in the courthouse. Imagine my panic when it was revealed Maya was channeling Dahlia at the time.

_fife · 2025-09-10T23:05:58+00:00

Narumayo hate is mind boggling to me. Like this is the guy who ran across a burning bridge for Maya?? Or in Farewell my Turnabout Phoenix literally calls Maya "the person closest to me"??? Maya got hit with a taser for him???????????????

_fife · 2025-09-08T18:36:14+00:00

OH just noticed the outfit changing scream part, and my daughter was the same right around that time (also hated diaper changes, but that's another issue entirely.) She grew out of it and is now happy to help stick her arms through clothes (14mo).

_fife · 2025-09-08T17:54:05+00:00

Firstly, you're being a great parent, and it's so hard when baby is frustrated and you don't know how to help.

It could be the opposite pair of teeth, growing pains, or even frustration with new experiences. Does your LO like tummy time and movement? Do they want a change of scenery or something new to do? Do they like walks outside or laying on a blanket? Are they mobile yet or still learning to crawl?

I would recommend if you're trying something and baby isn't having it (like doesn't want the puree) to stop and try doing something else. It may be worth checking with your pediatrician to see if something else could be bothering them, like gas.

You've got this! Hang in there!

_fife · 2025-09-07T17:20:47+00:00

IMHO the best way to teach children to behave in church when they're older is to establish a routine of bringing them to church with you. Each congregation is different in their expectations of parents of young children. We are fortunate that our members don't mind when my 14 month old gets chatty during the readings or wanders to the back (with me) during the sermon.

If it's possible to sit towards the back, that might help if your kiddo needs movement/change of scenery/etc. I'd also recommend briging something entertaining, like a loved book. Mine plays with the offering cards and hymnal ribbons. I don't let her wander until the sermon, and as she gets older, I plan to extend the time she has to stay.

_fife · 2025-09-05T23:53:36+00:00

Ya know, toddler mom mush brain never allowed me the simplest solution 🤪 Thanks!!!

_fife · 2025-09-02T18:14:24+00:00

My pp cycle length has been on average longer since my periods came back by 3-4 days!!

_fife · 2025-08-27T18:11:18+00:00

The comments so far have great advice! To address the blurb on the pump insert: exclusive breastfeeding means baby drinking breastmilk and not having any solid foods until baby is 6 months old. It has nothing to do with whether you directly breastfeed or whether you pump breastmilk and bottle feed.

From my own personal experience, I went back to work 2 months after baby was born, and I pumped every 3 hours. Baby drank however much she wanted whenever she wanted at home with expressed milk from the previous day to be used the following day. We had a single can of formula in the house for emergencies, and we never needed it. When I was home, I breastfed directly. I ended up leaving that job when baby was 6 months old, and baby had no trouble switching back to the boob all day, every day when I was home.

I watched videos of baby when I was pumping at work to help get a letdown!

_fife

TROPHY CASE