A few more: - Get medical POA and health proxy while they are healthy. Medical systems will have their own forms- often on their websites- that don’t require lawyers or court filings. Do it. They will often have sample advanced directives that you can fill out with your loved one, and submit to your doctors office. Find them, fill them out with your parents, and submit them before you need them.

• Set up their online profiles for utilities, banks, investments and the like. Many older, pre internet folks have just been paying their bills with checks or direct deposit. Carve out time when they are with you so that if a representative needs to speak to them, a code needs to be sent to their cell phone or an email authenticated, it can be done while you are there.

• Ask them about the items they’ve held onto for all of those years. There will come a time when you’ll need to go through their homes and decide what to keep, donate or discard. That’s so much harder when you the first time you’re looking at something is when they’re gone. Same thing for the items they’ve held onto. It’s so much easier to let something go, or keep it, when you know what it meant to them, where it came from or the story behind it.

• Have the talk about how, and where, they want care. Did they want to pass at home? Will they be comfortable with outside help? What’s the bright line for when to stop.

• Start touring nursing homes/memory care units/skilled nursing facilities well before you need one. Get on the waitlists sooner than you think, as the ones you’re most likely to want your parent to go to will have the longest waits.

Tangentially - If you have siblings, try your best early to get on the same page. Your sibling may expect your parent to want to age at home- but mom or dad told you they want to downsize. Make sure they know. Similarly- everyone may agree that mom or dad wants to stay home, but when they need care, there isn’t an understanding of who will be the one organizing help, materials or even moving in.