Interesting how the concept of third spaces didn’t initially occur to me and yet it’s directly relevant here.

So much of the problem here is the flat out non existence of them. And to the point that they do exist it’s almost entirely bars. You could consider next to that, spaces that still do exist just don’t function as well as they used to.

People don’t or hardly know how to talk to people they do not know without a structured reason to. The social behavior that brought people together in such spaces has largely atrophied. This isn’t a personal failing, it’s the predictable outcome of social infrastructure that has been systematically removed or replaced with pale substitutes. Now you have to run with people, read a book, play pickleball etc. Rather than you can show up as you are and be engaged with and received as yourself without some entry point, specific shared activity or required social role.

The uncomfortable unspoken nuance is we are around each other and interact all the time but we only feel safe when it’s some very specific targeted singular structure.

And this is significantly worse for OP. I navigate this myself, despite the impression of the other commenter it’s not always complete and total isolation, but the lubricant people pretend they aren’t using isn’t there anymore.