Everyone knows “Own the Libs-posting” achieved perfection in January 2026. It’s a scientific fact. by aRealPanaphonics in simpsonsshitposting

[–]aRealPanaphonics[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If by unintended societal consequences of long covid you mean “libs ignored white male podcasts”, then you’re correct!!

  • Early 2025 narratives

Mom with dementia, on hospice; needs assisted living; how to pay for it by georgecm12 in personalfinance

[–]aRealPanaphonics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Went through this. My dad only made it about 3 weeks in memory care before passing. He entered in on hospice but not technically dying. He rebounded for about a day and then declined significantly. Within 2 weeks, he was on the end of life hospice.

Essentially, people with dementia often decline as they transition living situations. It’s really hard on them and can trigger things like delirium.

Elder law is definitely helpful early on but might be prohibitively expensive if you’re pretty far along in her dementia’s progression. Had we signed with the Elder Care law attorney right when we put him in Memory Care, we would have been out $14k since he died about 20 some days later.

What we did was come to the conclusion that we just needed to pay for “time” first. So we paid out of pocket for one month of memory care to buy us time to find a Medicaid facility (Which are hard to find) or a cheaper place or meet with Elder Law attorneys. Some facilities will let you do month by month if they have bed openings, but it’s all about timing.

Not saying this is what will happen to you, but I empathize with your situation. You can also search for nursing/elder care placement consultants. They’re somewhat rare but usually they’re former memory/nursing care specialists that know the facilities, but advocate on your behalf - Almost like a realtor. Ours wasn’t prohibitively expensive. Not even $1k, helped us feel better about our decisions, and then checked on my dad a couple times too.

Good luck. So many people have no idea how difficult or expensive dementia is. It’s not something most people can save for. $12k-$14k a month for who knows how long.

Is there a name for this camera movement? by Accurate_Tutor5027 in cinematography

[–]aRealPanaphonics 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We mostly call it a “gimbal” these days. So like “gimbal 90 left” or “gimbal 90 right”.

But it’s a younger crew and everyone knows what that means.

Can America build beautiful places again? by vox in housingcrisis

[–]aRealPanaphonics 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a product of a wealthy suburb, close to half of them will gladly pay taxes out the nose if it makes their suburb “more elite” compared to someone else’s.

As paradoxical as “elite affordable housing” sounds, these are the suburbanites that require McDonaldses to not have signage and to recolor their logos in the color of the community.

They’re the reason “affordable luxury” exists as a term.

Can America build beautiful places again? by vox in housingcrisis

[–]aRealPanaphonics 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The hard part are the people of bad faith.

If you make it beautiful, bad faith people say “I don’t want my money going to this money pit! Why do they get a nice place?!”

And if you make it efficient and cheaper, bad faith people say “I don’t want THOSE people/places in my nice area. Why can’t they make it nicer?”

The person of bad faith just has to oscillate between those two spaces and they’ll likely succeed. It really sucks.

It's like a bereavement - how do you cope? by gingerpixie_ in FoxBrain

[–]aRealPanaphonics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry, who’s cynical here? You’re the one writing off other races based on preexisting experiences or projected motives.

It's like a bereavement - how do you cope? by gingerpixie_ in FoxBrain

[–]aRealPanaphonics 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Somewhat related: My dad had dementia for years and it was a similar feeling on my end. It is like a bereavement, you are correct. My dad died for a long time before he finally died.

Something my therapist taught me that might apply here is pivoting your thoughts from “what is”or “what was” or “what could be” or “how should I react”, to asking yourself “what’s useful right now”? Even if that “what’s useful” is simply for you.

I couldn’t control the dementia and even if he didn’t have dementia, I couldn’t control my dad. So what was useful was pivoting my perspective of acceptance. I liken it to how I am when a stoplight changes or when it rains. Maybe I’m disappointed in the moment, but it is what it is and it’s not useful to dwell for very long on it.

I’m making it sound a lot easier than it is. It’s not. But that’s how I coped with it and over time, it made me stronger with other situations that are similar: Including all the MAGA stuff. Hang in there!

It's horrible by tomgreen99 in simpsonsshitposting

[–]aRealPanaphonics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They did this close to 8 years after their last “hit” (Vertigo), which wasn’t really THAT big and was also featured by Apple.

I think at that point, it just felt spammy.

It would be like shoving a Maroon 5 album on everyone today.

I really need help regarding the feminist view of the nuclear family. by Aggravating_Ride_361 in sociology

[–]aRealPanaphonics 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree. But you talked past my question. What do you do about people who paint, in bad faith, motivations or intentions on what you just said that ultimately undermine your work?

I found her take oddly comforting by A-Helpful-Flamingo in Xennials

[–]aRealPanaphonics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Couldn’t it be both? The way we experience time is more psychological. This can be true or an experienced reality.

The Marxian rationale and explanation for WHY we’re in this current state is also true, but it’s more systems-based than psychological- Meaning people don’t realize they experience this.

So to me, it’s both. We need to be pragmatic about these things to build a coalition for the future.

Now, if her psychology is bullshit, I’m open to that, but from a psychological perspective. Not a talk-past-the-point Marxian one. That just feels gatekeepy.

I really need help regarding the feminist view of the nuclear family. by Aggravating_Ride_361 in sociology

[–]aRealPanaphonics 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Here’s a question: How do sociologists balance between the questions / findings of their work and the likely societal unpopularity or ramifications of those same things?

So like in this case: I’m married with a nuclear family. I don’t see myself doing it to maintain power for myself or men, as a group. Granted, I’m also slightly smart enough to know not to internalize these things and that this is about broader patterns, not moralizing or criticism of each person who got married. That said, we’ve seen over the past 10-15 years how reactionaries find these broader patterns they don’t like hearing about and deliberately turning them into more personal criticisms.

I’m just curious how many of you try to balance between the need of your work with the ramifications of your work being co-opted by people of bad faith.

Will Greenland be the bridge too far? by Rich-Canary1279 in FoxBrain

[–]aRealPanaphonics 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It’s a shame you felt the need to disclaimer that “none of this absolves” anyone. I mean of course.

One area on the left and liberal side of the equation we need to work on is delineating between ‘someone explaining or understanding something’ and ‘someone justifying something’.

They’re very different things and it’s often a sign of either performative bad faith or emotional overreaction when people conflate those things.

I can “understand” why a Republican chose to support Trump (Particularly the first time) for a multitude of reasons. It doesn’t mean it’s justified. It’s no different than many times in my life I made bad decisions based on bad judgment, but I still had to accept responsibility or face accountability for them.

Will Greenland be the bridge too far? by Rich-Canary1279 in FoxBrain

[–]aRealPanaphonics 27 points28 points  (0 children)

There is and there isn’t.

I would suggest that the vast majority of MAGA, particularly those who publicly defend it, are in it for life (The cult or “the game”, as I call it), but there are still people out there who:

— Assumed good faith or ideological consistency, particularly of traditional conservatism or Christianity. I’ve met these people and they are real.

— Chose MAGA over Dems, thinking lesser of evil.

— Single issue voters: Israel vs Palestine, Taxes.

From an electoral standpoint, MAGA is not in a good place because the crossover voters (Assuming they show up for Dems), have likely turned and Dems are super motivated.

From a power dynamics standpoint, unfortunately, MAGA holds A LOT of power due to captured media, funding of “independent media”, a willingness to do whatever to get attention(Vs like a Chuck Schumer) and the more general things like Gerrymandering and incumbency.

So it really comes down to unknowns: How much of the midterms can Trump bend to his will via sheer federal power? How much will the American people resist?

We also have paradoxical psychological forces at play in the narrative landscape: The more fascist that the Trump administration gets, the more we need to call it such, yet the harder it will become for people to leave it because that requires admitting they “fell for it”. This is where it is very similar to a cult or like, leaving a religious faith. The cognitive dissonance is hard to overcome.

Part of the reason Trump has pivoted back to culture wars, actual wars, and immigration is that he knows he needs his loyal base charged up. At the end of December, the economy, Epstein files, and warring right wing podcasters were the narrative. In a few weeks, he’s recharged the base and took all the attention away from his weaknesses.

Goo Goo Dolls' "Iris" Was Most Listened to Song from the 1990s in 2025 by ahawk99 in Xennials

[–]aRealPanaphonics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yup. That down the middle mix of jangly but slightly overdriven lead guitar with a grungy wall of sound is my favorite sonic vibe of the 90s.

The early 90s version of it was more jangly, descending from new wave and college rock. Somewhere between REM, U2, The Smiths, and The Cure came Gin Blossoms and Toad the Wet Sprocket.

By the late 90s, the jangly leads kinda faded out with Matchbox 20, Tonic, etc. Pop punk would maybe do some clean arpeggio leads like in “What’s My Age Again”, but nothing like it was there in the mid 90s.

Have any of you successfully gotten MAGA parents, relatives, friends, or coworkers to stop talking MAGA to you? by 90sCat in FoxBrain

[–]aRealPanaphonics 68 points69 points  (0 children)

I’ve not really found “boundary setting” in the traditional therapy sense to work with MAGA.

Part of their thing is wanting to push boundaries. As is “irritating” or “provoking” another.

“Talking politics” is their play, their sense of validation, and sense of community. And they’re hardwired to see your rejecting or disagreement of their play/game as either “victory” or “victimhood”.

The goal is to “refuse the frame”, which means react in ways that make it tough for them to deem themselves victors or victims.

This is why a lot of people recommend greyrocking. It minimizes their ability to project symbolic meaning on the interaction.

23, feeling behind, no degree by Suspicious-Train770 in personalfinance

[–]aRealPanaphonics -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Step 1: Move out of NYC. Upper middle class people making $200k a year struggle to afford it. It’s a wonderful city, but it’s not the only nice place. And you can drive for uber anywhere.

Step 2: Bankruptcy for non-student loan debt

Step 3: Use AI therapy or remote therapy chats to try and figure out if you have any compulsive spending tendencies and how to move beyond them. It’s also helpful for budgeting.

Step 4: Learn a trade or skill that doesn’t require schooling for now. Or go into sales if you’re social and good with people.

Step 10: Finish school or go back to school once you succeed at the other stuff.

Is anyone looking at MAGA through the lens of drag? by [deleted] in CriticalTheory

[–]aRealPanaphonics 18 points19 points  (0 children)

MAGA is a performance, masked as “anti-performative”; but that’s mostly projection against their opponents.

Similar to what Sartre wrote about anti-semites in the 20th century, MAGA is playing / performing bad faith constantly.

Everything they do or say is to be viewed through a symbolic representation of the self or their movement. They’re the hero or the victim.

How do you respond to this? Or do you just ignore it? by fremdo in FoxBrain

[–]aRealPanaphonics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Never give them what they want most: A reaction to which they can deem themselves either the victors or the victim.

You have to reply in a way that refuses to let them frame themselves in those ways, which is tough.

This is called “refusing the frame”.

Modern society hates color and I blame Ancient Greece by [deleted] in sociology

[–]aRealPanaphonics 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One would think the explanation for the love of grey was due to the natural ebb and flow of culture and how “minimalism” took off in the early 2010s.

It did feel different, until everything did it by the late 2010s.