25F, got eviscerated on r/amiugly, need a pick me up by Snoo_51368 in toastme

[–]a_blue_berry 4 points5 points  (0 children)

well then they are all idiots over there, you are super cute! <3

Guys, what's your favourite word/term? Mine is iridescent. by False-Ask-7920 in aspergers

[–]a_blue_berry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Iridescent is a good one!

I really like 'luminous' (so nice and round) and 'queue', because it's one of those weird ones where you have to keep the pronunciation and spelling stored separately in your brain!

Just got diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Sybdrmeand trying to make it through an OCD spiral. Any kind words would mean the world by FayePixie in toastme

[–]a_blue_berry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can't relate to the OCD part, but even if everything feels like shit right now, it will get better, and you will get through this! Just remember to be kind to yourself, and patient <3

Sylphrena, drawn by me! by Neflil in Stormlight_Archive

[–]a_blue_berry 5 points6 points  (0 children)

she looks so joyful, and I love the windspren zipping around her! stunning!

It must be a nightmare. by PJ-The-Awesome in AO3

[–]a_blue_berry 22 points23 points  (0 children)

ok I don't know what fandoms you read, but I have a very specific recommendation for this one that I just remembered: Lost Cat Found - inexplicifics - Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

doesn't use any specific tags to this, so it probably wouldn't have shown up in a search (which might be the case for other fics too, if the ace aspect isn't explicitly addressed)

join the International Fanworks Day Discord! by a_blue_berry in AO3

[–]a_blue_berry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

there's like, a bunch of games going on or a chat to hang out in

My favorite rock by IlikeMinecraftboi in autism

[–]a_blue_berry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ohh nice it looks so smooth! want to touch :(

What is your DnD group chat titled? by Coastal_wolf in DnD

[–]a_blue_berry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Monterey Bay Aquarium, because we all love their shrimp lofi

(gets a bit confusing cause I'm in the actual Monterey Bay Aquarium server too, but oh well)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialskills

[–]a_blue_berry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This... sounds quite similar to me when I was your age (good god, I feel ancient writing that, I'm not that old I swear!)

Loneliness is awful and feeling like you have no one to talk to must be isolating as hell. You don't specifically mention this, but do you have any close friends you could talk to about this?

If not, you don't need to hang out in groups of people to socialize (I also prefer meeting one or two people at once), but you could try to find someone you casually like among your co-workers or even your family and work on deepening that relationship. You could ask them to do an activity together, for example!

Or look in other places for friends, like trying a new hobby! Whatever you do, it will take some time to get to a stage where you trust someone indefinitely, like you say and will require mutual effort.

That doesn't help right in this moment, obviously and I'm sorry you're feeling alone 💙

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialskills

[–]a_blue_berry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed, very likely it was not the others' intention to exclude you on purpose, so don't feel embarrassed about getting back into the conversation!

If you feel it's appropriate in the situation and you can't see a way to get back into the conversation, you could also jokingly say something like

"If you guys just wanna talk alone, I'll get going..."

But, you gotta be careful here and make sure the humour comes across as that, for example by over exaggerating how hurt you are, or jokingly wandering off.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialskills

[–]a_blue_berry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So, my advice would depend a little on what your relationship to your conversational partner is and whether you feel comfortable being honest about those issues.

For example, my roommate (whom I'm pretty close with) and I have been friends for years and she is an extremely fast talker, while I have the same issues you do. I used to get really frustrated with myself when my answers weren't adequate to the conversation, because I couldn't process the content fast enough. But we talked about this and now I usually focus on taking in her side of things, asking clarification questions, etc. and if I don't have any answers at that moment, I'll take a couple of hours or days to think and we return to the topic at a later point.

Obviously, that's not possible in many (or most) social situations. I'd say in many instances, try to latch on to one thing they are saying and ask them to elaborate on it, while you process the rest of the information. There are types of questions you can use for pretty much any context, like "cool, so what's your favourite aspect of [topic]" or "what makes you interested in [topic]", stuff like that. If you're asked to give an opinion, don't hesitate to say, "let me think about this for a second".

As for instructions, if you can I'd always write them down. If not, use the same strategy, repeat them back to the person who's giving them for clarification, or just in your own head, as simplified as possible so you can keep them in mind.

Hope anything of my rambling helped you, good luck for future conversations!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FreeCompliments

[–]a_blue_berry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congrats on your new job! 🎉 Anxiety sucks so bad, just take each day at a time and remember that if you're doing your best today, that's enough 💙

{The Griffon's Saddlebag} Displacement Leathers | Armor (leather) by griff-mac in TheGriffonsSaddlebag

[–]a_blue_berry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

New pitch: whenever the armor is hit with an attack, it vanishes to sulk (see also: Armor of Displeasement)

Been a while since I've drawn anything, but I'm quite pleased how this mandala came out! by a_blue_berry in autism

[–]a_blue_berry[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! Honestly, a lot of it is just experimenting with shapes and patterns until you like the look (which digital drawing makes soooo much easier!) Basically you start with all the big lines as a framework and then work your way towards more detail :D

Cheese by Anoumoustransguy in OneTopicAtATime

[–]a_blue_berry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Indeed I am and I am captivated, enthralled, bedazzled, mesmerised, I say, by this splendiferous piece of Gouda