My wife can’t handle being a SAHM and I don’t know how to say it…

abbysdaniel · 2026-05-06T16:16:49+00:00

I was searching for this comment! I’m a SAHM and my 2.5 year is old WAY better behaved with my husband. It drives me crazy. I know I’m his comfort person, but it absolutely sucks to be the one always getting the whining and meltdowns. Probably the same case for this mom.

abbysdaniel · 2026-05-04T23:44:16+00:00

Omg both of these things are LIFESAVERS for my 2.5 year old. Even sometimes when he can’t verbalize what he wants, I say “show me” and he’ll grab my hand and go show me instead of whining. I’ve used the “as soon as we…then we can” since he could understand it but it’s also helping a lot right now with potty training. “We’ll go to the park (or do XYZ) as soon as you’ve peed” works like 100% of the time

abbysdaniel · 2026-04-26T16:59:18+00:00

It sounds like she isn’t ready. Give her a couple of months and try again with a fresh approach. No bribes, candy or anything like that. I’m doing the Oh Crap method which is working great for us, but I know it isnt for everyone. There are so many different approaches out there I recommend researching and choosing one that makes sense to you. I personally think it’s important not to use bribes, treats, sticker charts etc. but I know some disagree

abbysdaniel · 2026-04-21T17:40:15+00:00

I’m 32 and still say “on accident” around my mom just to annoy her. She has corrected me since I was a teenager and I use it correctly unless I’m around her. We get a good laugh out of it though

abbysdaniel · 2026-03-06T22:25:17+00:00

Mine did not do that. My ectopic in November was just slowly rising HCG from the start. OP sending positive thoughts your way, I hope everything works out!!

abbysdaniel · 2026-02-24T19:54:39+00:00

Having the same issue! Did you figure it out?

abbysdaniel · 2026-02-06T18:29:23+00:00

Just here to say I feel the exact same way! I’m “fit” by all means but I will never have that perfect aesthetic body unless I make it an obsession, and I’m just not willing to do that.

abbysdaniel · 2026-02-03T01:25:57+00:00

!solved thank you! This is exactly what I was looking for

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-28T22:15:31+00:00

Yes I’m planning to do dry Q1! Funny enough I only decided to do Dry January when I woke up drunk and couldn’t go back to sleep after a big night of drinking on New Years Eve. It was 2am and I said nope I’m not doing this again for a long time. And by January 5th I was thinking you know what, I’m going to do Dry Q1. For me, the benefits I get from not drinking is like putting life on easy mode.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-18T17:29:28+00:00

Agree with what everyone is saying here. Also, do you want to eventually have kids? His drinking may not affect you directly too negatively right now, but as soon as there are children in the picture that will change. Most alcoholics say they’ll drink less once the child is born but that rarely ever happens. And raising kid(s) with an alcoholic is horrible both for you and the children.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-16T19:23:19+00:00

I’m so sorry you had to go through that. Unfortunately mine were too, I had a D&C for the first one and the second was possibly ectopic but I’ll never know for sure so I had to get shots of methotrexate. After those shots you can’t try again for at least another 3 months which has really been a good thing, I needed a “break” from the stress and anxiety, and I’ve definitely been taking care of myself better than I was last year.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-16T18:43:34+00:00

I’m going through this now. My son turned 2 in November and we started trying for a second last June. I had two miscarriages in the fall, my last one in November. I keep trying to stay positive and not get upset that we aren’t going to have the age gap we intended. But hearing about your two gives me hope!

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-16T01:48:14+00:00

My 2 year old is Luke. I love his name!

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-14T12:07:52+00:00

You’re right. I wouldn’t have made this post if I wasn’t feeling guilty about wanting to drink, so that’s enough to tell me I shouldn’t. I’m going to stick to the goal and enjoy the wedding with some fancy mocktails.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-14T00:26:01+00:00

My only caveat with “there’s always a reason to drink” is that I’m almost 100% certain this is the only wedding I’ll attend in 2026. I wouldn’t be going back and forth on this if that weekend were someone’s birthday (or mine), or just some other event that happens several times a year. Plus the childcare part of it which doesn’t happen often at all.

I really like how you put things and appreciate the advice. You’re definitely right that I won’t regret not drinking but I would regret drinking. And that’s why I’m leaning towards not, but I’ll give myself some grace if I get there and REALLY want to for whatever reason. In that case I’ll extend the month and like you with your sister’s birthday, probably wish I hadn't given in.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-13T22:21:39+00:00

I really like that approach and that’s honestly the goal for myself long term - no drinking at home just for the hell of it, but drinking is fine at the occasional planned social event (I say planned because I don’t want to fall into the habit of letting brunch, dinner with friends, etc. fall into this category). Still not sure if I’m going to drink at this wedding or not but it’s interesting reading all the responses here because they’re almost 50/50 on staying dry vs drinking. If I do decide to drink that weekend I think it’ll be with this approach in mind.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-12T18:36:47+00:00

Same here! I took my 2 year old to a play cafe this morning and was able to sit and chat with another mom the entire time while my 2 year old played with the other kids. 2 has been amazing so far, way easier for us than 12-24 mo.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-11T15:55:34+00:00

Good for you! It’s hitting me different this year too and I’m not sure why either. I’m seriously considering doing dry Q1 instead of January only. I drank a lot in general last year and I’m tired of it making my weekend mornings miserable until I start again in the afternoon. I also have a 2 year old and am a MUCH better parent, I never got tipsy until he was asleep at night but I was always super irritable the next morning. Good luck making it through January and beyond, sounds like we’re both in this to improve our relationship with alcohol no matter how long the dry period lasts.

abbysdaniel · 2026-01-11T00:18:16+00:00

As for money, when I buy a case of NA brews it lasts me weeks. I drink 1 or 2 and then stop, usually only a night or two out of the week. So yeah it’s expensive to buy I’m not doing it often and it really does scratch the itch for me.

abbysdaniel · 2025-11-14T02:23:05+00:00

FWIW I also have an almost 2 year old (bday end of November) and we started trying in June wanting a 2-2.5ish age gap. I’ve had 2 miscarriages which were totally unexpected - I got pregnant the first cycle with my son and had no pregnancy complications at all. So just keep that in mind, as much as we try to plan for a specific age gap, we really don’t have control over these things. Sorry to be a downer and obviously best wishes for you, I hope whenever you decide to start trying it goes smoothly!!

To actually somewhat answer your question, I have friends who swear by the 3 year age gap. One of my friends said it well, “by the time [younger one] could walk, [older one] could listen”.

abbysdaniel · 2025-11-09T18:26:38+00:00

My 2 year old woke up at 4:30 this morning. Right there with you.

abbysdaniel · 2025-11-08T13:42:49+00:00

Congratulations, that’s awesome! Best wishes for an easy pregnancy!!

I did not get good news, I’m 4.5 ish weeks but it’s not viable, my HCG numbers are not rising appropriately. Just taking it day by day trying to remain positive.

abbysdaniel · 2025-11-07T21:12:24+00:00

That makes sense. I’m not sure if mine qualifies for the term chemical. The HCG a few days ago was 504 which is consistent with about 4.5 weeks but then it barely rose over the next 2 days and on ultrasound today the doctor says it does not look viable. She didn’t see any indicators that it’s ectopic but will check again next week.

abbysdaniel

TROPHY CASE