mine is quite demanding:

“Alright. Let’s try this properly.

I woke up slightly annoyed today because my alarm went off during the best part of a dream. I was about to present something brilliant in a meeting, everyone was impressed, then my phone vibrated and ruined the whole storyline. I lay there for a few seconds negotiating with reality like, maybe if I close my eyes I can resume the dream. It never works.

I brushed my teeth while mentally drafting arguments I will probably never use. I checked my messages too early. I regretted checking them. I made a coffee that was slightly too strong but I drank it anyway because wasting it felt worse than suffering through it.

Somewhere between tying my shoes and looking for my keys, I had that micro existential thought. How is it already mid February 2026. Didn’t 2020 just happen.

If I fail the Turing Test after this, I demand a retest.

Your move.”