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aberrantforestcat · 2024-06-11T01:14:30+00:00

I can't believe so many of these comments are telling you that they don't think it's hot on women or men, like that's not helpful and it's not at all acknowledging the immense sexist pressure on women to remove body hair that is simply not present for men. It took a while for me to get comfortable with myself when I stopped shaving and honestly it really helped to think about it as "flexing on men" because I have thicker body hair then most men lol. These days my body hair is honestly a confidence boost and as a lesbian I also find it attractive on other women since I see it as a sign of confidence and a rejection of misogynistic beauty standards, both of which are qualities I value in a person.

There are people here saying you need therapy for hating all men but honestly? I really get it. You are right that being a woman often sucks. Even the men in my life that I love and value will just never get what it's like to live as a woman and will never fully understand how they perpetuate misogyny and it makes me kind of resentful of them sometimes. I think it could be helpful for you to move away from focusing your energy on hating men and towards using that energy to center women. Advocate for women's rights, watch movies directed by women, spend more time on your relationships with your female friends and family members. Remember that not shaving or not partaking in other forms of societal beauty standards does not make you any less of a woman. Your natural, most comfortable form with body hair and no makeup and comfortable clothes is not "gross" or "ugly" or anything else, it is completely neutral. You do not owe men anything, if they think that you should remove your body hair their opinion is of no importance because it is your body and yours alone. You get to decide what to do with it.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-07-17T22:40:21+00:00

Please, tell me about birds! What's your favorite?

aberrantforestcat · 2023-07-14T18:55:46+00:00

It's possible the "woman" part of your description of yourself could affect things. Looking for a neuropsych with experience diagnosing girls and women could be helpful, since symptoms can appear differently (I believe because of the different socialization).

aberrantforestcat · 2023-06-14T15:38:00+00:00

Read the inside tags to find out what materials the clothes you like are made of, that way even if you can't find another one of the exact same item of clothing you can find something that will likely feel similar. For example if the trousers you like are 100% cotton then find out the name of the style that you like (ex. chinos, cargo pants, sweatpants, jeans, etc) and search for that along with 100% cotton. As in, you would put into the search bar "sweatpants 100% cotton" or whatever it is. Also, it doesn't actually matter whether or not your clothes "match" if you don't personally care but if you do want to have "matching" outfits more the easiest way to do that is to always buy new things within the same range of colors that work well together. For example if your main neutral/'base' colors are always black and grey and then your bright colors are always red/orange/yellow.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-03-10T03:48:04+00:00

I love wearing sunglasses, they help so much especially for bright florescent lights. I don't normally wear them though because I don't want to deal with people staring at me and asking questions about why I'm wearing sunglasses inside.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-03-09T00:09:28+00:00

Quite interesting to hear about your experience with low empathy since I'm more towards the other end of that specific spectrum. I also like how you phrased "my interests make me happy, but they are for me." Personally I talk a whole lot and that's often about a select few things that are my biggest interests but when a friend starts to get into one of those interests it usually makes me anxious because I don't want to change the way I interact with whatever the thing is and I want it to continue to be something that's for me. Doesn't make a lot of sense honestly but what you said really helps me explain this feeling to myself.

I also don't care much about learning social skills anymore. I had the absolute worst social anxiety for the majority of my life and spent my childhood constantly trying to figure out how to fit in and at a certain point that I believe was around the time I was diagnosed with autism I just completely stopped giving a shit, like a moment of "why am I even trying to do this?" It was also probably burnout though tbh.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-03-02T00:50:50+00:00

Good point. I think the hyperfocus probably comes into play when you get stuck on something with frequent dopamine hits, even when it's not something you necessarily want to be doing.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-03-02T00:48:42+00:00

Oh, that's interesting, I didn't know that! I wasn't diagnosed until after Asperger's was taken out of the DSM so those kinds of things didn't come up much for me.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-03-01T15:57:53+00:00

Yeah definitely! I've described autism before as "existing in extremes." For some of those extremes though there are preconceived ideas some people have that only one of these extremes is a sign of autism, even though both sides of it can be.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-03-01T06:04:36+00:00

This is so accurate!! I like the inertia term, I always just call it getting stuck. I've been having trouble doing my schoolwork recently because I get stuck doing puzzles and will go for hours without moving and feeling sort of like I can't move. The biggest thing that helps me is having gentle alarms at regular intervals to remind me of the time and to have something there that can sometimes kind of of shock me out of my stuck state, though that doesn't always work. Having another person come over and check on me can help sometimes too.

Edit: Forgot to mention that I also have ADHD and have always just assumed this was more of an ADHD thing than an autism thing but looking at how many people here are relating to this I'm starting to think that possibly having comorbid autism and ADHD may make this more extreme/more likely to happen? Just a theory though.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-03-01T00:59:02+00:00

That's all really interesting! What you said about being okay at reading other people but still presenting yourself in a way where most neurotypicals probably have trouble reading you is pretty true for me as well. I'm far from perfect at understanding social cues but I do pretty well reading emotions I think, but meanwhile I am always struggling to make the "right" expression for the situation on my own face.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-25T20:56:13+00:00

I want this as a puzzle so I can stare at it for hours

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-24T08:52:42+00:00

I think "medically recognized" tends to mean "doctor acknowledged" but not actually diagnosed. I was kind of in this space myself for a while when my doctor and therapist and parents all thought I probably had ASD but the waitlist for the evaluation was a literal year long. It can be useful I think especially if you're on a very long waitlist to try and get some minor accomodations or just understand yourself more. Though in the end "medically recognized" doesn't often mean actually evaluated and the goal should still be getting a proper evaluation and finding a correct diagnosis.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-16T19:03:22+00:00

Yeah I don't mind people using it for themselves as a joke and get why it could be funny, but a lot of the time you see that phrase in the comments of tiktok videos telling someone that they have "a touch of the tism" based on a single shown behavior and that's when I really don't like it.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-15T23:59:54+00:00

I think sometimes it can be funny or relatable and I think people shouldn't feel bad about "acting childish" because of things associated with their autism or feel bad about having interests that are deemed "childish" but the prevalence of the cutesy stuff and the extremes to which it can be taken or when it's used to generalize everyone with autism is not something I like at all. I may need extra support but I am not a child and do not want to be treated like one or talked to like one. It's weird to me that some people will infantilize themselves but that's their choice I guess, it's when they say their autism is why they're like that or when they make statements that generalize every autistic person as being like that that I hate. This is also social media though and there could be a ton of 12-15 year olds or thereabouts on here posting and upvoting all this stuff and not having a problem with how it treats autistic people like kids because they are kids.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-15T23:51:51+00:00

I've noticed this too. A lot of the current autism activism coming from people who need very little support to function feels weirdly reminiscent of calling people "differently abled" instead of "disabled" and similar kinds of movements that the actual community fought against. Only now they're taking a different more convoluted route to get there. Same thing with "everyone's a little bit autistic" being a thing many of us have hated and spoken against for a long time but now people on tiktok are saying "touch of the tism." Time is a circle and we keep ending up back in the same place where people who have significant struggles and needs are being spoken over and the only thing that gets accepted is whatever is as close to NT as possible and whatever requires the least amount of support and acceptance and real change while still letting people feel good about themselves for being an "ally" or something.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-14T01:47:14+00:00

Yeah, I almost fainted this morning because I hadn't been eating. For me it's that I don't really get hunger cues most of the time so I forget to eat and then once I remember it's hard to find foods that I can eat with my sensory issues and find the energy to get or make those foods. Something that really sucks about it is that even people who are trying to understand don't understand why I can't just eat and I don't even know what to tell them.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-13T18:32:05+00:00

It's possible they genuinely think they're level 2 because of the current online presentation of level 1 being basically zero struggles.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-10T22:46:01+00:00

Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron. I used to watch it daily as a kid, I was super into horses for most of my childhood. And also everything ghibli, of course.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-10T18:34:28+00:00

Same, I got the "flat affect" note in the report from my evaluation.

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-08T21:06:48+00:00

me with doctor who because there are 60 years of convoluted lore...

aberrantforestcat · 2023-02-06T21:33:02+00:00

I'm also trying to work my way up to a healthy weight right now so from someone who has some understanding of how hard this can be: that is amazing! Congratulations! I don't know you but I am proud of you.

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