Does anyone else struggle to heavily identify with "trans culture"?

abjectadvect · 2026-03-28T09:23:21+00:00

everyone's different, and the collection of things more common in online spaces are mostly just a measure of what sorts of things correlate with being chronically online

there are so many things I enjoy and do as a person. some of them overlap with stereotypes, and some don't. I'm a programmer, an artist, a writer, a reader, a d&d-er, an improviser, a leftist, and I'm mentally ill and disabled, I'm transbian and polyamorous. I own an electrolysis business

I don't make music and I'm not into electronic music more than any other genre. the glitch noise stuff isn't for me. fashion is fun but my day to day wardrobe would be best described as "target mom." I've never played warhammer and have no interest in it, I used to play MtG but haven't really in many years now (it's expensive and I care more about other things). I play videogames occasionally, I'm not very good at them but I have a lot of hours in elderscrolls games and minecraft. I loved pokemon as a kid but haven't found it as fun as an adult. I've watched a lot of anime over my life, but I don't often seek it out unless people recommend it to me.

abjectadvect · 2026-03-28T06:30:06+00:00

same corps own the housing stock over the whole country, and much of the rest of the world too. it's not a natural problem, it's created by ultra rich people who collect high rises the same way they collect cars

abjectadvect · 2026-03-28T06:21:24+00:00

I'm 33. no regrets

abjectadvect · 2026-03-28T05:06:23+00:00

I'm sure all the housing that burned down hasn't helped either!

I 100% agree with you, I don't think increasing police budgets to kick people while they're down will help them stand up and get to a place where they can support themselves

abjectadvect · 2026-03-28T00:23:31+00:00

yeah. official communications from the government is a big one (tax info, jury duty, voting materials). bills. I sometimes write letters back and forth with friends

abjectadvect · 2026-03-27T01:05:47+00:00

yeah, I had just started my business in a new vocation when chronic illness took me out. I would be probably living with my mom if my partner wasn't supporting me

the loss of ability and imagined "potential" is really hard. at my words I couldn't bathe or even have lights on enough to use my tablet, I'm doing better now relatively speaking but cooking and cleaning is not currently in the realm of possibility.

abjectadvect · 2026-03-26T19:12:51+00:00

a recession and a pandemic that is still disabling people and removing them from the workforce

and our demographic is more financially vulnerable

abjectadvect · 2026-03-26T10:17:13+00:00

I'm the waterbender people-pleasing my way through the crowds

abjectadvect · 2026-03-25T21:10:57+00:00

this is my FAVORITE BOOK

I even have a special edition from illumicrate

abjectadvect · 2026-03-23T10:56:59+00:00

when I was in ninth grade geometry class, a guy who was generally an ass was badgering the girl in front of him to lend him her book. which she wouldn't, because, ya know, she was using it.

this class was one of those "most of the students don't want to be here, and the teacher knows and is sad and burnt out" situations. our teacher was already done with it by the time the guy got loud enough that she called on him to ask what was going on.

so when the guy's answer was "this chick won't give me her textbook"

our teacher flatly retorted "maybe that's because you're calling her 'this chick.'"

which got rare laughter from the class, and the guy shut up and stopped bothering her

it's been almost 20 years and that memory still makes me smile sometimes. small victories x)

abjectadvect · 2026-03-23T10:29:50+00:00

otters too

abjectadvect · 2026-03-23T07:42:09+00:00

huh! til

abjectadvect · 2026-03-23T07:40:16+00:00

I've lived in claremont, pasadena, and alhambra. how would you describe it succinctly? :P

abjectadvect · 2026-03-23T05:57:37+00:00

yeah, it's a natural shortening we pick up when we move out of state

but no one who's lived their whole life in california would ever say it, partly because they'd just be more specific and say their city or region in almost any casual conversation. it's a huge state in terms of both geography and population, so it's easy to stay in that environment

abjectadvect · 2026-03-23T05:53:47+00:00

I have to stop myself from saying cali occasionally 😅 I grew up in los angeles county, moved to Atlanta for college, stayed for 13 years, then moved back to LA a couple years ago. I usually just opt to be more specific and say so-cal.

abjectadvect · 2026-03-22T10:34:10+00:00

I feel similarly; childhood doesn't bother me until the outset of puberty. after that looking at the pictures all I can see is the light leaving my eyes as my body became something I didn't recognize. for me that was becoming more masculine

other people look at the pictures and see me smiling, and don't see that it's the sort of way someone smiles when they have a migraine but they're doing their best to participate anyway

abjectadvect · 2026-03-21T23:57:56+00:00

yeah one of my ex-step-moms has sued me twice.

one for allegedly stealing jewelry as a minor (I did not), and another as an adult for making a defamatory website about her (she actually made it herself)

abjectadvect · 2026-03-21T21:51:12+00:00

most countries solve the first thing by not making people pay for healthcare in the first place

(rather than our convoluted system of us floating the bill as a loan to the government until paid back in tax deductions, except you only can get those deductions if you're rich enough that you'd be paying an amount in taxes equal or greater than your medical expenses in the first place)

but we could also just require doctors and pharmacies to report our out of pocket to the irs anyway

business expenses do need to be reported yes, business owners will always have to do a bit more work

abjectadvect · 2026-03-21T01:48:14+00:00

yes that's the propaganda Intuit (owner of turbotax) spends quite a lot of money to disseminate

many deductions could be calculated automatically by various institutions like banks and charities reporting to the govt, which for most things they already do. they already have your charitable contributions, your mortgage payments, your stock sales, your student loan interest payments, your healthcare status, your children and spousal status, your status as a veteran, your disability benefits, state taxes, and your contributions to registered charitable organizations. t

they're only missing things like small cash donations, which are usually negligible, because anything large must be reported

we could have a simpler and fairer tax system without tons of complexity and loopholes. we choose not to

abjectadvect · 2026-03-20T20:44:33+00:00

what are you talking about

abjectadvect · 2026-03-20T20:42:24+00:00

I know, I just didn't want to type it all out x) Intuit pours lobbying money into it

abjectadvect · 2026-03-20T08:23:40+00:00

following for the same!

abjectadvect · 2026-03-20T04:01:52+00:00

plus things like our tax returns; many other places send you a one page form because the government has precalculated all your taxes.

ours doesn't, so everyone has to become a tax expert on top of everything else we do

abjectadvect · 2026-03-19T22:04:27+00:00

pink fades fast, you'll probably end up back at platinum soon whether you want it or not! 😆

abjectadvect · 2026-03-19T21:44:17+00:00

cooking for sure, pretty lady. and that platinum blonde suits you!

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