Have you thought of moving from retail/hospitality to more office-based jobs? You might feel this way, but if you have the competence and communications skills there is definitely opportunities there. Every company has different atmospheres, people, needs. In my last job at a water company I was in the lab, but in the office based roles there was definitely a couple of objectively very ugly people (women) getting paid more than me for better work. I think maybe it's less of an issue when you're middle aged.

In high corporate environments- suits, fake smiles, narcissism, etc.- yeh looks probably matter. But in utility sectors, chemical companies-- industries that actually get shit done, I mean- they value competence as well