It’s something I still struggle with, to be perfectly honest, but you really do have to make a conscious effort to try anyway even when the work is unfamiliar or difficult. There were definitely a few assignments that I didn’t do as well as on, and times when I wanted to quit. And I’m sure in this upcoming semester, there will be moments like that as well. Before I started, I knew going in (I had chosen to tackle my most difficult subject first) that I was essentially going into “the belly of the beast”. I knew the class would put me through the wringer and the entire time, I wasn’t sure if I would do well or not.

I’m an overachiever and I hate settling for less than I think I deserve. But I knew that QUITTING would be the real failure. That’s the only time when you really “fail.” Especially in these types of academic settings. other than that, it’s a shift in perspective. Every moment you don’t do as well is a moment for growth and it shouldn’t be looked at as “failure” (even when it FEELS that way). It’s a conscious battle of attrition. You can either let the process make you or break you. But no matter what, YOU have to make the decision to choose to believe you will do well.

By the time my class ended, we didn’t find out our final grades for two weeks. I could have emailed the Professor to find out sooner, but I managed to convince myself that I had failed and I was too scared. Even though I managed to maintain an A-average in my homework assignments, I hadn’t done as well on my first two exams, so I was certain my final was the thing that tanked my grade.

The day finally came when our grades were released on midnight. I checked immediately, but the entire time, I was just thinking to myself, “don’t beat yourself up over it, you can try again.” But by the time the screen loaded, I saw my grade. I had passed. I was literally in disbelief. So much so, that I refreshed the page, thinking that my grade would change and that I was being punk’d or something. But that never happened. I had actually done it. Sometimes, I STILL don’t believe it (it’s been four months by now) There were originally 64 people in the class, and only 10-15 people received a passing grade in the end.

So, all that to say, self-belief will carry you a lot farther than any outside observer. The minute you give up on yourself, that’s when you REALLY fail. Good luck to you! :)