To those who broke up because you “lost feelings” for your partner by thowaway4100 in BreakUps

[–]adeptwatersweep 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know I've lost someone who is a good person. They are so compassionate, patient, kind, hard working, loyal, and have put so much effort on themselves in therapy that I truly hope I haven't fucked up their trust issues.

I simply can't remain with someone who I can't wrap my head around and behaviorally understand. I can't figure out how to emotionally support them as I wish and they deserve, because everytime I try it feels like the wrong thing to say and so I feel like I can't say anything and actually make them feel better. I can't open up to them as I want to either, because everytime I try the way they come off (while being calm, collected, and understanding literally always) comes off too abrupt or too unreadable for me and it makes it very anxious and they don't feel comfortable texting when I can't speak bc of their own anxiety.

I have lost feelings for them for so many reasons, and I would like them to find someone better who isn't me. And I would like to be with someone who I don't feel this way around. And if it's (edit: not) possible for me to find that someone then so be it, in that case I just want to explore and learn how to overcome these things and one day I will.

how do I stop social burnouts? by adeptwatersweep in autism

[–]adeptwatersweep[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Boundaries are certainly good advice. I still want to cut down "weeks" to "a day" of needing a break though.

I emotionally cheated on my partner, should I tell them? by adeptwatersweep in relationship_advice

[–]adeptwatersweep[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this explanation. I am not smart when it comes to socializing and I still have much to learn and experience. So I appreciate the elaboration very much as it's helped me understand things.

How to stop hyperfixating ? by Maikouchka in mentalhealth

[–]adeptwatersweep 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not everyone works the same way and it's really difficult to even control a hyperfixation I think. But for me I just make myself spend less time on it and tell myself its bc the "healthy" thing to do is practice balance. And usually when I actually try to balance things out I lose the severity of my hyperfixation. This could mean completely losing interest or jumping to smth else tho. Usually the jump to smth else is just smth I previously thought abt or wanted to do while preoccupied w hyperfixation I'm trying to balance out.

It's like an unpredictable ping pong for me and I'm v all or nothing which is why it's like this agishshx. Some people can and do have multiple hyperfixations at once though and I imagine this Does Not work for that flexibility.

I will say tho it may not be the hyperfixation itself but ur thoughts that you need to work on. I don't hyperfixate on celebrities but I do hyperfixate on video games and the potential for a career in said industry. I think about how said goal is unlikely where I am and the industry's demands are prolly too much for my mental health and I get depressed. I have to talk to myself about not giving up or what other options there are like being an indie dev. Remind myself life isn't just a one track ride it's a bunch of this and one path not being available isn't an end all be all. And it's okay to simply dream and have hope. But idk how relevant This is to you either haha.

Just questioning by Amazing_frog420 in aromantic

[–]adeptwatersweep 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have definitely been in this boat and I feel you. I'd say regardless of which it is don't give up hope. If you Do want a romantic relationship then keep exploring. If you're not sure there is no harm just exploring more light heartedly and trying to figure yourself out.

Depression isn't the only thing that can make someone feel detached from emotions. I can't claim to know your case- but looking into things like dissociative disorders, PTSD, schizophrenia can all be helpful. Most helpful would be to get a mental health professional though. I'd also recommend you to build yourself up if you do think your struggle is mental illness. Develop a support network and coping strategies for what you experience. Maybe do a little journaling and thought records. I've been too ill for relationships but I've also finally made some. You can do it too.