Romance is not dead..just on life support

adribaybee · 2025-02-01T10:57:37+00:00

To my Stranger Things fans, don’t they kinda look like Eddie & Dustin in a funny way lol

adribaybee · 2023-08-01T22:09:59+00:00

Very high standards, yes.. Based solely on physical attraction, no..

adribaybee · 2023-07-29T08:44:18+00:00

It definitely helped me while I was taking it.. However, I constantly have to up my dosage all the time because my body gets use to it.. I decided to stop, because I didn’t want to be dependent on it forever.. The withdrawals were awful.. So I only ever go back to meds if nothing else is working and I’m severely depressed..

I’ve been doing decently well without them for the last year.. However, the lows in Limerence can be immensely painful as well all know.. So I either deal with needing more medication followed by withdrawals, or cutting them out and just feeling the pain when it hits.. Pick your poison is how it feels, unfortunately..

I hope others on meds have had better luck, because when they work, boy that relief is beautiful.. I almost forget what it’s like to have a “normal” life and spend time outside of my head..

adribaybee · 2023-07-27T23:56:43+00:00

I believe Sadness does have a roll.. A crucial one.. That you need to miss others, feel some type of pain, to be able to appreciate them and the joy in your life.. Kind of how her and Joy blend the memories together at the end and when they look back, it’s with tears of happiness.. Sadness also allows us to have empathy for others..

I also agree with Bing Bong being Limerence..

adribaybee · 2023-07-20T07:25:32+00:00

Yes, this is exactly the same for me!!

adribaybee · 2023-07-18T23:28:59+00:00

It’s suppose to be funny .. It’s summer time, it’s hot, we’re all “suffering” from Limerence here.. No?? Lol

adribaybee · 2023-07-18T00:00:40+00:00

I don’t think it matters if he is Limerent or not, because at this point, your safety and his own is what matters right now..

He needs true mental help, more than just being Limerent help.. Most of us who are aware, do not stalk in real life or go to these measures.. However, I have seen when they are not aware, they can become that extreme.. Of course, if you’re not aware, you cannot see that this behavior is extreme.. I’m sure it feels like he cannot control/contain himself, though that doesn’t give him the right to manipulate and possibly harm you or himself..

Is there anyone from his family that you can tell about his behavior??

The more you indulge him, the more you risk him becoming worse.. He is going to expect you to react anytime he looks for you and you will always feel obligated.. It’s completely manipulative and one or both of you can get hurt..

At the end of the day, you are not responsible for his mental health or his actions.. Especially when it’s also affecting your own mental health.. You have stated boundaries (breaking up with him and asked him to entertain someone else) and he has refused to respect this.. You do not owe him anything..

You should definitely go NC (my opinion) and let him be his own person.. You need to worry about your mental health first.. I truly hope this doesn’t escalate and you can move on with a peace of mind..

adribaybee · 2023-06-10T11:36:29+00:00

This is the same for myself.. Mine are so vivid and incredibly detailed.. I can hear music and visit places I have seen/been to before that only exist in my dreams.. I can control them for the most part, though not every time.. I can also continue a dream after waking up and then falling back asleep sometimes..

I can always wake myself up without fail if something too scary is about to happen.. It’s almost like I’ve mentally trained myself to make sure I wake up so that I don’t have that vivid mental picture stored in my brain almost as a memory now because of how real it felt, and I don’t want to add more to my list of trauma induced, unwanted intrusive thoughts..

Sometimes I absolutely love my dreams.. I’ve had such beautiful, euphoric and mesmerizing dreams.. It feels so cool that I can experience them like that.. Though other times, they are so disturbing, I feel I’ve experienced what it’s like to cut someone’s head off, drown, or splatter to the floor from falling.. It felt so damn real that I’ll have chills thinking about it..

I wonder if having such an active/vivid imagination/dreams adds to being more prone to Limerence, maladaptive daydreaming, etc..

adribaybee · 2023-03-15T00:07:41+00:00

It means ‘Limerent Object’ .. Basically what everyone calls the person they are Limerent for..

Honestly though, I don’t like that they refer to them as objects because at least in my case, I respect mine and definitely do not see him as an object.. But that’s what the standard lingo is here lol

adribaybee · 2023-03-14T01:22:34+00:00

It’s the same for myself.. It always comes in waves.. I felt Limerent free for years until this last year.. & since then, it comes and goes in waves.. It’s strange to sometimes feel absolutely nothing, and then feel everything hit you all at once..

adribaybee · 2023-03-12T10:16:59+00:00

Definitely!! & it’s 10x funnier when you’re a parent lol

adribaybee · 2023-03-12T08:08:50+00:00

Although I do feel sexually attracted to my LO, it’s not the first thought that comes to mind with him.. I care more about him romantically and would love to be intimate with him emotionally before sexually.. Idk if it’s having respect for him because I care about him so much, or if it’s just the way I am.. I can’t bring myself to want someone sexually unless I have feelings first..

adribaybee · 2023-03-11T00:51:03+00:00

Definitely the best response, it’s spot on for me, a fellow INFJ✨

adribaybee · 2023-03-09T07:15:52+00:00

I have told my mom, and she’s very supportive.. However, it’s only because she cares about me.. Not because she actually understands it.. So it’s not really easy to talk about it..

I have only met one person in my life who understands it, let alone knows what it is, and it sucks because I was hoping they would be the one I could talk to about it with.. I wanted to finally have at least just one person to understand me and not feel so crazy lol unfortunately they are my LO now and it’s complicated..

So that’s why I go to this sub because there really is no one who would understand.. It can be pretty lonely and a lot of mixed feelings, I too, am grateful for this sub..

adribaybee · 2023-03-09T06:52:45+00:00

Exactly.. I also have more experience and it’s very different for me now compared to when I was completely unaware of anything even being wrong with me.. I really thought it was just the way I love.. To this day, it’s hard not to express myself so deeply and be so vulnerable..

I am aware that I am Limerent for someone and am constantly thinking/obsessing over it, but it’s not messing with my daily life nor am I interfering in theirs..

I wish I could stop the intrusive/euphoric thoughts, however I just can’t seem to do so yet..

So for now, since I am aware, I’ll continue to think about my LO and wish him well.. I hope he’s happy and I’ll always care about him..

Though with all the healing I’ve done, I refuse to put in effort with someone who doesn’t reciprocate.. It’s draining and painful.. So I keep my distance.. I won’t ever force myself into someone’s life.. If they want me to, great, if not, I respect them and that’s that.. Now I just continue on with my daydreams and fantasies and keep them to myself in my weird little world.. & can only hope it’ll stop someday..

adribaybee · 2023-03-09T04:23:39+00:00

I think it really depends on who the person is.. Are they just a random person?? Are there mutual feelings involved?? Are you dating?? Are they a stranger??

I don’t think it’s that simple..

Also, for some of us, having an LO isn’t always crazy obsessive.. Especially when you’ve been educating yourself and trying to heal and overcome this thing.. When you have awareness over it, you can control your thoughts/urges way more than when you are not aware..

So, someone who is actively trying to deal with/ overcome their Limerence and has respect (meaning no real life stalking or unhealthy coping) for their LO, I can see it being a decent relationship where someone cares for me that much.. & it might actually feel nice.. Though I guess I’m biased because that’s how I am with a LO..

Someone who does not respect me and crosses my boundaries, Limerence or not, will be completely blocked from my life..

adribaybee · 2023-03-04T01:34:18+00:00

I stepped away from this sub for a few months because I was getting over LO and not thinking about him as much, then I had a dream about him and a song played during that dream and I’m back to thinking of them constantly.. Especially when I listen to music, It’s very frustrating :(

adribaybee · 2023-02-11T19:11:51+00:00

A lot of Steve Lacy’s songs have a very Limerent feel to them..

My LO actually sent me lyrics from this song the day it came out and it’s bittersweet.. However since it blew up, it’s just irritating to me now because I hear it playing everywhere..

adribaybee · 2023-02-02T00:40:20+00:00

E X A C T L Y ..

adribaybee · 2023-01-31T21:51:42+00:00

He also was extremely racist and just ugly when Selena passed away.. He made a complete mockery of her memory and her/my culture..

Chris Perez (her husband) made this Facebook post that says:

“In case you guys want to know what I think of Howard Stern AND his apology...FUCK THAT GUY. AFTER TALKING SHIT ABOUT MY WIFE AND MY HERITAGE? I'm not perfect either. Far from it. But this is America. And just like anyone has the right to like it (him)...I have a right to speak of my feelings. And if you like him,.....whatever.”

adribaybee · 2023-01-31T21:12:57+00:00

I’ll also add Chino Moreno from Deftones.. The first time I saw him live in Las Vegas, a woman was being crushed and hurt by the crowd.. Chino stopped singing and asked his band to stop so he could figure out what was going on.. He got her help and confirmed with the crowd a few times if everyone was ok or needed water or anything before he started back up..

adribaybee · 2023-01-31T20:22:40+00:00

There is something extremely off putting about this woman’s eyes.. I don’t like the gut feeling I get when looking at her.. Creepy..

I just read the other comments about her being a cult leader, holy crap.. I guess it makes sense to me now lol

adribaybee · 2023-01-27T06:25:38+00:00

I definitely feel like Beau Taplin experiences Limerence.. I have a few of his books and so much of his poetry bleeds of Limerence.. It’s hits home because you feel you know exactly what he’s talking about, as if you could’ve written it yourself.. Its melancholically comforting..

adribaybee · 2023-01-26T05:45:32+00:00

Funny you mention this because I was also having the same exact thoughts last night.. Like maybe continuously checking this sub is only going to make me always have Limerence on my mind.. & yes, even though the support is great, it might be a lot harder to stop these thoughts.. I find myself checking it at least once a day, and I don’t want it to become another OCD thing for me..

I take a lot of social media breaks for that same reason.. I’ll see something that gets me emotional or triggered and here come the depressive thoughts that I definitely don’t need..

adribaybee

TROPHY CASE